


Sugar burns

by jinyoungstuan



Category: GOT7
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Attempt at Humor, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, but probably not who'd you think of, kind of a road trip au as well, someone's hooking up in this because they stupid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-24
Updated: 2017-09-23
Packaged: 2018-11-18 15:21:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 47,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11293386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jinyoungstuan/pseuds/jinyoungstuan
Summary: Jinyoung always thought that it would be great to have a manual on how to read Mark Tuan; however at this point he was sure that even if he got one, it would be written in a foreign language with no translations and with a few missing pages.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello I'm back (again) (this time not to pain you).  
> me: hopefully no one will suffer here more than it takes to sort out their crushes  
> also me: *starts it backwards, leaving no clue what happened and why* :)))) 
> 
> anyway, if you're a bit confused about the title, it's not a verb "to burn", it's burns in, like, wounds. Too much sugar isn't good kids. 
> 
> also yay @ jb not being a psychopath in this one

“Chop chop, it’s _time-to-start-thinking-with-your-brain_ o’clock.”

Jinyoung, even though still more than half asleep, with hangover drilling a hole through his brain and muscles so sore he thinks he might’ve gotten into a fight last night, still finds it in himself to wholeheartedly curse the shit out of Jaebum, who let himself into his dorm room without any shame (thanks to Jackson, who probably thought they’re at the relationship level to give him a spare key).

“You can curse all you want, but you’re getting out of this bed _now_.”

“Get out,” Jinyoung wails, turning to a wall to avoid his best friend, but the bigger part of it is covered in photos they took during _the_ trip, and he definitely doesn’t want to think about that, so he plants his head into his pillow, hoping it will suffocate him. “Just leave me die.”

Jaebum, completely unimpressed, simply shakes his head and takes a free chair from his friend’s table and before sitting right in front the bed of the said friend, drags it against the floor as loudly as possible, making Jinyoung shiver from the unpleasant sound, obviously made on purpose. “So dramatic.”

“Says the one who chased his crush down the entire dorm with a bouquet of flowers, swearing that you won’t be able to live without him if he rejects you.”

“First, I was drunk,” Jaebum sighs, feeling his cheeks flushing red a little bit, as if that memory would belong to his darkest past corners that no one should ever explore. “Second, he was so touched and moved, he cried, so I still have an advantage against you.”

Jinyoung mumbles, voice a bit muffled by the early morning hoarseness and his pillow from which he still refuses to detach his face, “Jackson is allergic to flowers, that’s why he cried, you idiot. Speaking of, where _is_ he?”   

“At this moment, he should be on the phone solving the mess you made yesterday.”

“If it’s all about those few glasses I accidentally smashed, tell him not to bother, I’ll pay everything back.” Jinyoung says, feeling like he’s already a few hundreds of thousands wons poorer and that his parents won’t be very happy about that.

“He’s on the phone with Mark, actually.”

Jinyoung for a second stops breathing, as if truly hoping to suffocate and die in this bed, feeling how this time _his_ cheeks are turning pink from all the bottled up embarrassment and regrets; shame and hopelessness – that moment he feels like he’s feeling a whole bunch of emotions. However, he would rather stupidly die than to show them.

 “Oh.” That’s all he manages to let out. A long and kind of awkward pause ensues, while Jaebum is casually leaning back on the chair with a classic facial expression of _“are you really pulling_ this _shit on_ me _?”_ – lips pursed into a tight, but still slightly amused line, eyebrows raised and waiting for Jinyoung to stop acting like a three year old. The latter slightly lifts his head from the pillow in hopes and then immediately curses seeing that his best friend didn’t poof into the thin air. “I thought you left already.”

“Not going to happen.” Jaebum retorts, checking his phone that’s been vibrating like crazy for the last few seconds. “Luckily for you, Mark knows how to deal with his emotion department way better than you and he doesn’t hate you completely, but he’s leaving today. So move your ass, you’re going to the airport.”

Jinyoung finally sits in his bed, for some reason feeling like his headache gets worse every time Jaebum mentions Mark’s name. “Well no shit he’s leaving, yesterday I helped him to pack his suitcase before he— before we—“

“Before _you_ started acting like an insensitive, immature and jealous douchebag, who has absolutely no right to be jealous, because all this damn semestrr you didn’t move a single finger to do shit, that sounds about right.” Jaebum kindly summarizes, looking at the third bed in the room which belonged to Mark, now stripped off of any beddings, as the guy returned it to the dorm administration upon leaving yesterday. "But that doesn’t change the fact that he still probably likes you, even though I can’t imagine how and why.”

“He _flicked me off_.” Jinyoung stubbornly runs his fingers through his head, but flinches when they get stuck in the knots his hair is forming; but then again, he thinks, he might deserve the pain.

Jaebum crosses arms on his chest. “If you’re searching for reasons why, refer to my sentence before the last one. I’m not telling you to go to the airport, drop on your knees and propose to him – though he probably would like it, you’re both gross like that – but it’s a great time to move your ass to finally talk things out.”

Jinyoung, however, being his lame self, just falls back onto his bunch of pillows, saying, more to convince himself, not Jaebum, “I don’t even like him _that_ much, why should I bother?”

Jaebum seems like he’s running on low patience levels today, as he stands up to take Jinyoung’s phone, before the guy manages to let a sound of some sorts, and a few seconds later his face twists into a victorious and sarcastic smile. “You don’t like him that much, but your phone password is his birthday?”

“A lot of people are born on that day, he’s not special.”

“Name one more mutual friend of ours who’s born on that date, then?” Jaebum refutes and when Jinyoung’s lips form a well-known annoyed pout, which appears every time things don’t go his way, he starts laughing. “Knew it. Listen, you’ve used up your quota for excuses for upcoming ten years already, it’s not the time to get into debates. Mark’s plane is leaving in four hours and if you don’t move, it might be too late. Jackson says he doesn’t know whether he’ll be back for the next semester, mentioned some sort of a scholarship back in the States.”

Jinyoung closes his eyes and groans – out of frustration, but at the same time, more out of not knowing what do, as per usual when the topic turns to Mark. He knows he fucked a lot of things up last night, but it was nothing more than a mere attempt to save face, a try to show that he’s not bothered when he clearly was; but _then again_ , Jinyoung feels angry again – why is _he_ the one who has to make the first move? Isn’t it _Mark_ who always leaves whenever he feels like it? Why doesn’t _he_ say a thing, why doesn’t _he_ —

Jaebum abruptly ends his contemplations though, throwing a towel and dragging him towards the shower, ready to even give his best friend a bath if that means he’ll transport his self out of the dorm as soon as possible to save his already sad love life; fifteen minutes later he almost pushes the still protesting friend into a subway train, borrowing him his subway card, since Jinyoung lost his.

Jinyoung honestly feels like he’s going to a war from which he, most likely, won’t return unharmed.

And he’s not far from being right – a bit more than two hours later he’s returning from Incheon in a police car, with handcuffs on his wrists and most decidedly, without Mark next to him, thinking when the hell his life went so wrong.

The answer is quite obvious though – it leads to more than ten years back, back to their childhood.

 

*

Jinyoung was always a sociable kid, so there was no big surprise that when he was five, he made quite a statement by demonstratively plopping into sand in front of this one particular boy, ready to make new friends, because the old ones didn’t want to play tag with him.

The language in which the boy was talking to himself while playing with his toy firetruck was weird and Jinyoung didn’t understand any of it; and on top of that, the kid gave him quite a harsh side-eye after he attempted to talk to him.

Jinyoung thought that the kid was being mean, so twenty minutes later his mom was trying to come up with a believable excuse for her son purposefully stuffing a handful of sand into the said boy’s face; Mama Tuan wasn’t satisfied, contrary to her son, Mark, who was wiping his semi-fake tears away with a chuckle behind his mom’s back.

Jinyoung refused to apologize and that earned him two weeks of being grounded, but after that, it was the same boy who came up to him when he finally was allowed to go outside and asked if he wants to play together.

Jinyoung was also an observant child – even at the age of five, he didn’t take long to realize that soon he became more close to Mark than he was to any of his other friends – of course, other kids were still as friendly, always shared the cookies their moms made and were ready to fight whoever hurt Jinyoung or any other member of their little “crew” of other neighborhood kids; but Mark was even friendlier, he’d always let Jinyoung play with his toy cars or would always be the one to climb a tree whenever Jinyoung lost his precious tennis ball somewhere among all the branches.

They were inseparable, their parents sometimes had to forcefully keep them at home so they wouldn’t go outside to meet and play from the very moment the sun rose; they also were the ones to go home the latest, only after countless tired _“Mark, get back home right now, it’s almost midnight”_ or “ _Park Jinyoung, if you don’t come back home this instant, you’re grounded for a month”_ from their parents. However, their friendship was bound to face some hardships, as well.

The first time Mark had to leave it was because his grandfather died back in the States. Six year old Jinyoung wasn’t aware of what exactly the distance between America and South Korea means – Los Angeles didn’t sound that far to him, for all Jinyoung knew, it could’ve been located somewhere on the other side of the neighborhood, like, right behind the supermarket he always went to with his dad; he hoped that Mark will come back the same evening to play hide and seek with him, but the latter didn’t, even though Jinyoung sat on the pavement all day longingly looking at the road, hoping to see a familiar car returning, until his mom called him home, because it was a late evening already.

However, eventually the summer was over and Mark returned, because he had to become a big boy and attend the first grade in elementary school since he was a year older. Jinyoung always looked at his huge backpack, which Mark was barely able to carry on his tiny body, with jealousy; mostly because school meant Mark meeting other kids and Jinyoung wasn’t a fan of the thought about Mark having any other close friends besides him.

Time was passing like that as they were growing up – Jinyoung also attended the same elementary school, as well as middle one, but Mark was a grade above, so they weren’t always able to hang out like they used to. They tried to spend as much time together as possible though – all the lunch breaks and evenings were spent together kicking the ball in the football field and pulling pranks on each other, getting into detentions together. Also, fighting with each other.

Jinyoung was twelve and Mark was thirteen when they fought so bad, the older teen was sporting a black eye from the younger’s fist. It was over something stupid, a dumb argument about basketball that got too personal and they didn’t talk for three weeks that felt like an entire eternity. On top of that, a new unfortunate circumstance appeared – Mark learned that he had to leave again.

His parents were business people, they had to travel back and forth, not really having where nor wanting to leave their kids alone, so it always felt like Mark grew up in a plane between Korea and the States.

This time Jinyoung fully understood what was happening, when Mark showed on his doorstep with bits of a fading bruise below his eye about which they laughed later, after Jinyoung finally apologized; LA wasn’t across the street or behind a supermarket. Mark wasn’t sure how long he will stay in the States this time, but he promised to call and write letters, and he stuck with his promise at first, but the calls eventually got rarer and rarer, and letters never seemed to reach Jinyoung, always getting mysteriously lost in the post office. And for the first time Jinyoung felt so, so lonely.  

But even _that_ didn’t last forever – even if Mark kind of abandoned him, now calling once a month for mere five minutes just to tell Jinyoung that he’s alive and well, there was a new kid in the neighborhood, Im Jaebum, who moved to Seoul from Goyang with his family, because it was more comfortable for his parents to commute to work every morning.

They met against their will – both of them having to wear their best casual clothes, because the neighborhood moms decided to throw a welcoming party for the newcomers, all of the families and their kids gathering to a boring garden party in the backyard of Ims. It didn’t go very well because Jaebum wasn’t exactly the most talkative person ever when it came to people he didn’t know, and on top of that, one of the neighborhood girls, Nayeon, threw up from too much candy her stomach wasn’t able to handle, ruining the appetite for most of them.

Jinyoung for some reason didn’t go home immediately after his mom allowed him to – he stayed to help Jaebum clean up the yard a bit, handling the empty plates and taking them to the kitchen; even though at first he was met with a doubtful and shy, but still thankful, smile and silence, an hour later, when Jinyoung made a fool of himself by walking straight into some closed door, they were laughing and joking together like they were long lost friends.

Actually, Jaebum was quite similar to Mark, Jinyoung thinks now, personality-wise, and maybe that’s the reason why he kept being around the guy – Jaebum was supposed to be in the same grade as Mark, one year older even if born on the same year as Jinyoung; equally as caring and just _Jinyoung’s type of person_ in general.

Mark, even though still a bit of a touchy topic, was fading from his life – sure, they exchanged a few messages from time to time, but they were bland and awkward, more talking about their other friends than themselves, and as Mark was never a social media person, eventually, even the messages were gone; Jaebum slowly became the person Jinyoung always imagined Mark being in his life.

It was Jaebum, not Mark, who once got this amazing idea to bleach his hair when they were fifteen and Jinyoung kindly took the role of a hairdresser – he had seen his mother and sisters doing the same after all, it wasn’t supposed to be hard. Actually, Jaebum wasn’t supposed to end up shrieking and with a burned scalp, his sunflower yellow hair falling off in pieces either, but…

It was Jaebum, not Mark, who carried Jinyoung – sixteen and drunk out of his consciousness for the first time – back to their neighborhood when they got a little too bold after classes ended that day, somehow convincing the convenience store grandpa that they were buying so much soju because their parents asked them to. It was Jaebum, not Mark, who let Jinyoung to sleep the alcohol off in his place, calling his friend’s mom and lying through his teeth that her son just fell asleep after a tiring studying session.

It was Jaebum, not Mark, that one night when they were seventeen, who was having a sleepover at Jinyoung’s place when latter’s family was out of city; who had to quickly think of how to react then Jinyoung suddenly announced that he might like guys.

“Well, I guess there’s a way to quickly find it out.” Jaebum shrugged it off, and approximately ten minutes later they were on the living room sofa with a laptop on their lap, thinking it was a great idea to explore Jinyoung’s sexuality starting from gay porno.

Needless to say, it wasn’t anywhere near being as smooth as they both expected, because fifteen minutes into a random video they selected by judging thumbnails and playing rock paper scissors, Jinyoung slammed the laptop shut, eyes wide and terrified.

“This never happened, we didn’t see a thing.”

Jaebum was staring into the void in front of him, scarred from what he just saw, but he managed to stutter out, “Are you—“

“This. Never. Happened.” Jinyoung repeated. “Let’s just go to sleep and forget that this day even existed.”

None of them were able to fall asleep that night; Jinyoung was rolling from side to side on his air bed, since Jaebum was supposed to be sleeping in his, feeling conflicted and confused about what he just saw. It was damn terrifying and scary, but he wasn't sure if he really disliked it _that_ much. Jaebum was lying down with eyes wide open and looking at the ceiling, because for the very first time in his life, a thought crossed his mind; a thought that he might not be completely straight either.

Sungjin, Jinyoung’s classmate and another close friend of theirs, who crashed their best friend sleepover early in the morning the next day and borrowed Jinyoung’s laptop to check what movies are on in the local cinema, was pretty shocked to see a window with hardcore gay porn tagged “not for weak hearted” (the tag that the duo of best friends, unfortunately, missed), but he wasn’t the one to judge and bring it up.  

At that time, Jinyoung felt pretty content with his life, but the thought of Mark, his partner in crime, his _soulmate_ , still wasn’t leaving him alone. Sure, he had an amazing bunch of friends, he couldn’t ask for more, but Mark’s absence left him feeling weird, especially when the last time Mark called, the conversation lasted two minutes and ended with his biting, “Well, I’m sure Jaebum is waiting for you, so you might as well just hang up.”

Mark and his family’s house finally was sold when Jinyoung was eighteen, making it kind of official – they weren’t planning to come back. He knew that he shouldn’t dwell on it so much, because they all had to move on – Mark definitely did, posting photos with every single new friend of his – but even then he couldn’t help but just stand there on the other side of the street, watching a new family move in; two little kids of the couple excitedly running around and trying climb the tree Jinyoung would always climb with Mark to compare who was faster.

He soon had to forget all these heartwrenching memories though, because his senior year were approaching together with college entrance exams. Jaebum was already a first year university student, a literature major coming back home only every other weekend, Jinyoung didn’t have much time due to studying either, but eventually he made it into the same university’s politics department and even the same dorm.

There he met a bunch of other people, most importantly, his roommate, this Chinese guy Jackson Wang, who was incredibly loud and sometimes overwhelming, but downright adorable and extremely friendly. Two years of Jinyoung’s student life passed in a blink of an eye, measured by empty cans of energy drinks and deadlines for all the assignments, until the first day of their third year came and the dorm administration suddenly decided that their old room needs some repair and moved them into a triple room.

“It’s not as bad as I thought.” Jinyoung decided, plopping onto his new bed after he and Jackson unpacked their small treasures that barely survived the trip from fourth floor to eighth, feeling the new and hard mattress almost breaking his spine. “I mean the room is pretty new and there’s no mold in the bathroom.”

“Don’t be happy so soon. Our new friend might be a psychopath or a med student.” Jackson mumbled, not really satisfied with this whole moving thing. “Or worse, a future _teacher_.”

“I thought expecting the worst was my thing.” Jinyoung only laughed at his roommate’s fear of being roomed up with someone who was potentially going to become something he despised with his entire soul, a teacher, or worse, a _professor_ , searching for a phone charger in the mess of his still unpacked things. Meanwhile, Jackson stood up and went to the still empty third bed, because his eyes caught something.

He took a paper, carelessly thrown on the bed; the paper looked similar to the ones he and Jinyoung got, room evaluation sheets before moving in. “I was right, a med student, we’ll have to set a trap next to our bunk bed so that he wouldn’t secretly practice cutting people open at night.” His eyes slid to the personal info of the student and Jinyoung was about to tell him to put it down before their roommate unexpectedly came back, but Jackson interrupted, “Mark Tuan, well that’s a name. It says he’s new here, a transfer from the States, _nice_.”

Jinyoung felt like someone would’ve punched him straight in the lungs; expecting every possible worst case scenario was his thing, but even _he_ didn’t expect to hear Mark’s name ever again if it wasn’t on his Facebook feed, let alone having to _live_ with him in the same room.

Things were about to get interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> excuse any typos you'll find (and you probably will find some), it's late and i'm tired, who knew writing a potential fluff will be more tiring that writing angst.  
> anyway, hopefully yall liked it, and comments are always welcomed!


	2. Chapter 2

It was one of those early afternoons during which Jinyoung was slowly falling asleep from boredom in his new hiding place – this very special library corner where no one ever went to, except for a few lost and scared first years who were supposed to volunteer in cleaning this place from incredibly old and outdated books.

To Jinyoung, it was also one of those early afternoons, during which he was avoiding Mark, knowing very well that the older guy had a gap in his schedule just like he did, and most probably was spending it in their room – and Jinyoung genuinely loathed these afternoons.

Mostly because living with Mark Tuan in the same cramped dorm room was supposed to be unbearable – Mark was supposed to be _that_ LA dude so full of himself; his ego was supposed to explode into Jinyoung and Jackson’s faces immediately after their first meeting; Mark was supposed to hold incredible grudges against his former friend (even though the latter himself wasn’t sure for what reason) and constantly remind about them having a fallout.

In short, Mark was supposed to be a pain in the ass, and to Jinyoung, he truly was. Just that the reasons were different.

Mark was incredibly nice and down to earth, greeting them with widest smile they had ever seen that evening of their first day of school year; he didn’t even shove the fact that he knew Jinyoung and had quite a long and dramatic history with him into the younger’s face, just simply asked how life’s been going all these years when Jackson wasn’t listening (“Umm… Yeah, fine.” Jinyoung choked out, suddenly feeling like he was unable to swallow the gulp of water he ran to get from a water dispenser located in the other end of the corridor of their floor, hoping that while he wasn’t in his room Mark would poof into the thin air as a horrible hallucination).

Mark was kind of quiet, even though he had his moments of hyperactivity and hyena laugh, he never had countless friends over; he didn’t have a habit of scattering his dirty laundry in the room and he didn’t even spend three hours showering in the mornings – seemingly, there was nothing to hate him for, a lot of people would kill for such unproblematic roommate, but definitely not Park Jinyoung.

“He’s probably just pretending to be nice so he could stab me in the back.” Jinyoung declared in the shared kitchen of their floor one evening, two weeks into living together. Kitchen was an ideal hiding place as well, because Mark never used it, thinking that every inch there was a safety hazard thanks to all the mess. “Nobody is that nice after, like, four years of a total non-talking regime.”

“Looks like you’re going to stab yourself even before he even gets this thought.” Jackson noted, leaning against a counter while his friend was chopping some vegetables for dinner with such anger, it looked like that carrot had personally offended him; that, or maybe he imagined that the vegetables were Mark.

“Mark Tuan, at 3 o’clock.” Jaebum whispered into Jinyoung’s ear, waking him up from his near-napping and overthinking state, and the latter couldn’t determine why his heart almost stopped and he almost fell off the chair – because of his best friend being a creep or Mark possibly seeing him.

However, Jaebum, being as mature as he was, just silently chuckled after a few of Jinyoung’s _“Where? Where the fuck do you see him?”_ full of panic and said, “I don’t know if it’s hilarious or just sad. Calm down, he’s nowhere near, I’m sure he didn’t leave the dorm after we went back together after a class. I think he said he’s not planning to go anywhere till the evening.”

“You were going back to the dorm together?” Jinyoung frowned, still holding his palm on his chest like he would be afraid of his heart jumping out of it any second. “Since when are you such good friends with him? Did you decide to betray me like Jackson did? I _knew_ it. I knew I shouldn’t trust your asses, it probably was Mark’s plan from the very beginning, to make my friends his, and then—“

“People breathing the same air as Mark Tuan barely counts as a betrayal, you know.” Jaebum sighed. “We have the same class on Tuesday mornings and so it happened that I was walking back to the dorm after it and he joined.”

“Same class?” Jinyoung wasn’t about to let it slide so easily, because Jaebum was forced to swear that he was going to report it to his best friend if their paths will ever cross; and that was clearly what Jaebum wasn’t doing, apparently. “How is that even possible when he’s a med student?”

Jaebum shrugged. “He took the Language and Culture course as an elective it seems, and it’s compulsory for me this semester, there’s nothing to solve, Sherlock. He’s a bit clueless at these kind of things, to be honest, but that doesn’t stop half of our girls from drooling all lecture long. It’s kind of gross, especially when he doesn’t even spare a glance at them.” He concluded, now dragging Jinyoung along the bookshelves in search for some book he needed to read for his homework. Suddenly, his gaze shifted from the book to something and he incredulously told, “Damn, speak of the devil, he’s actually here.”

Jinyoung only snorted at that. “Yeah, sure. I’m not that stupid to fall for the same prank twice, so save it.” However, his eyes followed his best friend’s just for the sake of safety and, unfortunately, he indeed did see a very sleepy Mark Tuan, looking like he just woke after a nap, with a messy mop of bleached blonde hair sticking into various directions. And then Jinyoung’s mind went blank.

“Oh hey, Ma—“ Jaebum didn’t manage to finish the sentence and fully raise his hand in a greeting, as Jinyoung grabbed his arm and dragged him into the nearest section, basically very violently slamming him into a bookshelf and startling a young librarian, who started working here last week (Jinyoung was such a regular visitor by that time, he felt like he personally knows all the staff).

The worker rose her eyebrows at them and for a split second it looked like they were going to get scolded, but then she giggled, gathering all the books she was sorting out, saying only an understanding, “Couples these days.”

“We’re not—“ Jaebum tried to protest, but Jinyoung was truly determined not to let him finish any more sentences.

“Have you lost your mind?” He whispered, peeking his head out a bit to see if Mark noticed anything weird, but the latter was all the way across the library now, stuck in biology section, having zero clue about what was happening. Jinyoung sat on the ground panting a bit, because moving Im Jaebum from his place when he’s not fond of the idea is a task from the capital T. “He almost saw us!”

“Yeah, that’s usually the main goal of people greeting each other.” Jaebum said, sitting down next to his best friend and shaking his head. “Forget what I said earlier about this being hilarious, now it’s just really sad. He’s your _childhood friend_ , for god’s sake, not an ex ready to put a poisonous snake in your bed while you’re asleep. How long are you going to avoid your _roommate_?”

 _Till we all graduate, or better yet, for the rest of the eternity_ , Jinyoung wanted to tell, but he didn’t say a word, demonstratively pretending like he didn’t hear a word coming from Jaebum’s mouth. He was ready to spend the entire night here, if only that meant that Mark was leaving the library first.

Jinyoung himself didn’t really know why such drastic measures were even needed – it wasn’t like there was something, some kind of bitterness or grudges left from their ten year old arguments about why Mark wasn’t calling for months or why Jinyoung was hanging out with other people than they were used to when the older guy still lived in Korea.

Mark didn’t even seem bothered by the fact that he was replaced by Jaebum in Jinyoung’s life – only if things Jaebum was saying about Mark being friendly with him were true, and no one had any reason to believe otherwise. But Jinyoung wasn’t about to admit that probably _he_ was the one acting like an unmannered asshole.

Instead, he decided to make the best out of the time they were bound to spend stuck in this small space until Mark transports his ass out of there (and Jinyoung wished that he wouldn’t get an idea to stay there and study, because then they would be, softly speaking, screwed), and looked around. It wasn’t a book that caught his attention, just a leaflet left by someone, advertising an event and Jinyoung gladly shuffled through the contents of it, having nothing more interesting to do.

“A rice festival, wonderful.” He mumbled, tossing the leaflet away, completely unimpressed.

“A what?” Jaebum asked, lifting his eyes from his phone and quite confused about this kind of concept.

“The annual rice culture festival in Icheon.” Jinyoung quoted the front page. “I think Jackson mentioned something about having to go to this next week, all non-Korean students are advised to go and learn things about culture, all that jazz. Most of them are going only because they will be excused from classes that day, Jackson probably too.”

Jaebum stayed silent for a while, thinking about something, and Jinyoung was slowly starting to forget the things he just read about, because there were more important things – for example, how to check if Mark was still in the library, since he was gone from biology section and was nowhere to be found. However, Jinyoung’s rising panic that his current biggest problem will walk in on them sitting on the floor like dummies was soon interrupted by Jaebum again.

“Can we go there as well?”

“Where?” Jinyoung asked absent-mindedly, busy trying to tilt his head in a certain angle to see if he could get a better view of the place.

Jaebum’s answer was a barely audible mumble and for some reason he looked really flustered. “To Icheon.”

Jinyoung finally gave up on finding potential ways to break his neck and darted his stare at his best friend, not really understanding this sudden urge to travel. “It’s a festival. About rice. I repeat, _rice_. The thing you see at least two times a day, what else is there to see? I understand having all the non-Korean students going, since they know shit about history and such, take Jackson for example, but… Wait. _Wait a minute._ ” Jinyoung finally found the loose thread in this mess and he definitely wasn’t letting it go. “Jackson. That’s why you suddenly flamed up with the wish to go after I mentioned him, isn’t it?”

Jaebum shook his head as if he was about it shake it off for good, Jinyoung could’ve sworn he heard him accidentally bumping it into a bookshelf behind him. “I like rice. I _love_ rice, I’m just really interested in the history of it, I always was. Like you said, we eat it every day, so I think it’s important to know abou—“

“Cut the bullshit.” Jinyoung was smiling so wide, it physically was starting to hurt his cheeks, having a field day after finding something to draw attention from his _Mark issue_. “Since when?”

“Since when what?”

Jinyoung rolled his eyes at this denial. “Since when you’re so head over heels for Jackson Wang that you’d even go to a _rice festival_ for him?”

“I’m not head over heels for him.” Jaebum’s refusal to accept the reality confirmed it even more and Jinyoung just shook his head at that; and when the silence stayed for too long, Jaebum asked again. “So… Can we go?”

“What’s in it for me?” Jinyoung wasn’t about to sacrifice his entire day playing a cupid without having Jaebum suffering for it for the rest of his days, and the latter, seeing his friend considering a positive answer, looked like he was ready to sell his soul for that.

“I can do that homework assignment for miss Hong’s class about Korean literature, which you took as an elective?”

Jinyoung considered it being quite a decent bargain, even though he couldn’t really remember the assignment task for some weird reason; but he still nodded, what made Jaebum look like he was about to grow a pair of wings and fly away from happiness – he jumped from the ground and ditched Jinyoung, who suddenly remembered something, shouting to Jaebum’s back. “I had that class last semester you asshole, you tricked me!”

Jaebum only turned around for a second, showing him both thumbs up and yelling back, “You’re the best!”

Jinyoung sighed when a librarian told him to sign under a paper saying that he got one penalty point for being loud and cursing in the library; but hey, at least Mark was nowhere to be found, and it was lunch time already, meaning he will be able to hide himself in the dorm kitchen again.

 

“Remind me again, why on earth did I agree to do this? Aside from the obvious fact that your lame ass tricked me?” Jinyoung mumbled, feeling his feet burning from too much walking around looking at various forms of rice usage – rice cakes, rice drinks, rice paintings, rice _everything_ – and of course, it all was done without them hitting the initial goal Jaebum was still stubbornly trying to deny; Jackson was in another excursion group and they weren’t able to meet yet.

“Because you love me and you’re the best friend ever?” Jaebum turned to him, hopelessly expecting a positive answer from a guy who was unceremoniously woken up at 6:30 AM just to board a bus, probably as old as their grandmothers, just to see some rice. “That, or you thought about it and decided that it’s a great opportunity to continue avoiding Mark, since he wasn’t in the list of people going. Or at least I didn’t see him anywhere.”

Jaebum wasn’t that far from being right – without him and Jackson in the campus, Jinyoung probably would’ve spent the entire day somewhere outside, where a possibility to bump into his roommate was close to zero. He wasn’t going to admit it though, and, surprisingly, the situation was saved by none other than Jackson Wang, who appeared out of nowhere, wrapping his arms around his friends’ shoulders and telling, “Well hello, ladies. What are _you_ doing here?”

Jaebum got startled to the point he spilled the entire cup of some free (and tasteless) rice drink he got to try earlier, and Jinyoung was spitefully happy about his best friend making a fool out of himself with a stained white shirt, because that was what Jaebum deserved anyway. “Jaebum seemed to be extremely interested in all kinds of rice and I just couldn’t help myself but accompany this young soul yearning for some rice knowledge to this hell hole.” He said with a sarcastic smile.

“Your enthusiasm will truly take you places one day.” Jackson rolled his eyes, finally releasing them from his embrace as they were trying to get through a crowd looking at a Korean traditional clothing exhibition. “So, what really brings you here? Is Jinyoung running from Mark yet again?”

“Bullseye.” Jaebum was quick to change the topic from himself and he, together with Jackson engaged in their new favorite activity – roasting Jinyoung for his refusal to interact with Mark more than it was crucially needed; the latter wasn’t really down for this, but he mentally sighed thinking that he can sacrifice himself for a few minutes if that helped Jaebum to get closer to his quite obvious crush. “A few days ago we had to hide in some random library section, because Jinyoung couldn’t get past Mark picking books on the other side of it.”

Jackson dramatically clutched his heart. “I don’t blame him for not being able to get past, lord, _have you seen that smile of Mark’s whenever he sees a familiar face_?” He was so good at faking eyes dripping with affection and admiration, it was clear that Jaebum got slightly uncomfortable; a thought crossing his mind, that that was it, Jackson had a crush on Mark, but the latter was quick to clarify. “I mean, I don’t like him to the point I’d go crazy, but he’s like the nation’s first love of our university, everyone is swooning over him.”

“You don’t like him that much, but your traitor ass is still ready to help him with his Chinese essays literally in the middle of the night.” Jinyoung noted.

“So what? Are you jealous that he’s not asking for _your_ help?” Jackson jokingly fired back.

“I wouldn’t help him even if he asked.”

“Yeah, exactly like that time when he asked you to help him with some documents he had no idea about and you just mumbled that you’re late to your PE class, which, let me remind you, you don’t even have. Really nice things to do to your former best friend.” Jackson replied, when they reached a stall with a very cute old lady selling rice cakes, or more like giving it away to anyone whom she deemed cute enough. “Stop being the nation’s pain in the ass, Jinyoung, what has he ever done to you, asides being nice as hell to your obnoxious self?”

The old woman notices the trio of visitors, looking at the rice cakes with a bit of curiosity, so she immediately got on her feet, flashing the widest smile ever to Jackson. “Oh dear, what a handsome young man. And what do you eat that you grew up so well?”

Jinyoung rolled his eyes, whispering, “Jackson, I swear to god, don’t you dare to say ri—“

“Rice.” Jackson responded with his lame joke, sporting the most innocent facial expression, and Jinyoung pretended to be throwing up. Jaebum, however, found the joke incredibly amusing, and Jinyoung just sighed at this rather cute, but still unbearable sight. “So,” Jackson continued, after getting a full huge bag of rice cakes for free. “What _did_ Mark Tuan do to you that you seem to get an allergic reaction every time someone mentions him?”

“They were childhood best friends or something.” Jaebum responded instead, followed by Jinyoung making a sour expression; it felt like he had an official representative for interviews, just that this particular representative didn’t bother to check all the answers with him first. “I don’t know a lot of things, since I moved into the neighborhood when Mark was already in the States, but from the way Jinyoung spent his days moping around all sulky and dramatic, it looked serious.”

Jackson got genuinely confused. “So where’s the problem? You missed your childhood friend, he probably missed you too, boom, he moved in into the same room, he’s nice, friendly and all. Isn’t it a good thing?”

“No, it’s _not_.” Jinyoung replied in a hurry, before Jaebum managed to offer more of his insight. “Listen, he might not be that nice like all of you think he is. Time changes people, he’s not an exception.”

“In all honesty, I think you’re just seeing a problem where there’s none, because you don’t want to get friendly with him in case he has to leave again.” Jaebum said and it got his best friend wondering since when he started to get so deep into psychology, not literature. “If whatever happened after he moved out bothers you so much, have you ever tried, like… Actually _talking_ about it with him?”

“Yes.”

“No, never.”

Jinyoung and Jackson replied at the same time, and Jaebum, of course, sided with Jackson. “Why did I even bother asking.”

“I did talk to him!” Jinyoung protested. “I did say hi to him when he came back to the room that first evening after finding out that we’re going to live together.”

“With a facial expression like you were either going to have a heart attack or throw up, if not both.” Jackson corrected. “And that was the last time I saw you talking with him without being forced. He once legit asked me if you don’t suffer from some chronic pain syndrome or something, because of your face whenever you need to say more than good morning to him.”

“Oh shut up.” Jinyoung got annoyed, because _great_ , both of his friends are siding with Mark in this, and apparently, they were even having amazing small talks about him behind his back; _great, just amazing._

He didn’t open his mouth to argue anymore, being all sulky, but his friends didn’t want to deal with him acting like a five year old, so they decided that getting into a discussion about various kinds of rice was way more interesting, even though Jaebum, now having to carry all the responsibility of talking to Jackson without Jinyoung having his back, was more stuttering than actually speaking, and blushing every time Jackson slapped his back while laughing at his jokes.

This whole festival thing was slowly approaching the end, there was only a bit more than an hour left till they had to get into the busses and head back to the university, but that day karma didn’t like Jinyoung for whatever reason and decided to bite him in the ass.

The trio of them were walking towards the bathrooms, because Jackson drank too much lemonade, much like a kid not knowing when to stop himself; the crown was pretty huge on their way there, as they unfortunately were passing by some small event that had ended just minutes ago, and stage technicians were about to dismantle a portable stage.

The path was too narrow and the sun was a bit too blinding as it were the first days of spring, so Jinyoung didn’t see two guys carrying a huge piece of glass, probably left from some decorations, and he, of course, walked right into them, not noticing anything until he felt that he was lying on the ground with a pounding pain in his head, the loud sounds of shattering glass and people gasping reaching his ears with quite a delay, and something sticky running down his forehead, smelling like metal.

 _Wow_ , Jinyoung thought, feeling a bit dizzy and confused, as Jackson, accompanied by those two poor stage workers who were terrified to hell was rushing to find a first aid tent, while Jaebum stayed to make sure his best friend wasn’t about to die.

And then Jinyoung understood that him possibly cracking his skull open wasn’t the worst thing that could happen that day - Mark Tuan, returning to the accident site with his friends, flashing his stupid volunteer pass to everyone that was getting in the way, was.

“What on earth happened?” Mark bent down to look at the unfortunate soul that Jinyoung probably would’ve felt being lying among all the glass shards, if it wasn’t for that stupid dizziness.

“Walked into a piece of glass.” Jaebum reported, eyes full of worry. “The hit was so loud I thought he’ll pass out immediately. I really hope he didn’t get a concussion or something.”

Mark took out a pack of disposable gloves ready to inspect the damage to see if an ambulance was needed, however, Jinyoung wasn’t up for having him anywhere near, trying to sit up and incoherently mumbling, “No, thanks, I’m all good. Just going to get some more rice and head home, I’m totally fine, see? Bye.” His words were accompanied by a totally unconvincing swaying to sides as if he was drunk, and Mark gently pushed him back on the ground to lay still.

“Definitely feels like a concussion, if you ask me, but I doubt he got it here.” Jackson mumbled, feeling his knees still shaking, but his voice was already full of friendly sarcasm.

Yes, Jinyoung thought, with those bits of undisturbed sanity he still had, feeling nauseous on top of that; Mark Tuan, a person whom he tried to avoid at all costs, now ready to go to the nearest hospital with him, was definitely worse than a concussion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rice festival is actually a real thing that i've witnessed with my own eyes and that probably was one of the weirdest things i've ever been to tbh, but poor jinyoung suffering all kinds of injuries in my fics, from broken arms to a concussion.  
> actually, the original title of this fic was supposed to be "eleven days of rain", tho it got scrapped out the last minute; but soon it's gonna be applicable to my country, it's been raining non stop for 4 days already, and it's not a nice weather to write fluff lmao.  
> okay anyway, i hope you liked it, and as always, comments are always welcomed


	3. Chapter 3

“How do you feel?”

“ _Ugh_.” That was the only audible sound Jinyoung thought of letting out, lying in one of the beds of a hospital, not quite sure which part of Icheon he was in and how did he even get here. He felt like at some point he just passed out, even though he hoped that this unbearable headache was just a bad dream, together with Mark going to the ER with him, Jaebum and Jackson staying in the festival venue trying to find the professor who was responsible for this entire excursion.

“Can’t tell if that’s a legit response, or just a default reaction at seeing me.” Mark laughed, putting his phone away. He wasn’t mad about that though, it didn’t seem like he was holding any grudges against Jinyoung for the obnoxious behavior of the past weeks; there was nothing but friendliness, and a little bit of concern in his voice. “Your doctor should come back soon to check up on you, and if everything’s fine, we will be able to leave. Jackson and Jaebum had to go back to the university though, in case you’re wondering. Your teachers didn’t allow anyone to stay, so they all left after the doctors finished patching your head up.”

Jinyoung couldn’t help but notice that the way Mark spoke was different from how he used to talk when they were teens, he had an obvious English accent by now, which he didn’t really let slip these days, unless he was around someone he was comfortable enough with. And that realization kind of irked Jinyoung.

However, he was too tired to be mad at his friends for being traitorous asses and leaving him alone with his imaginary nemesis Mark, asking a simple, “So, how many stiches was my “karma is a bitch” day worth?”

Mark was surprised by the question, as if he didn’t expect that Jinyoung will tell him something that was made of more than two words, but nevertheless, he answered. “Five. Jackson asked the doctor if she can add a few more though, said something about needing to keep your brain in place.”

“Isn’t it amazing,” Jinyoung mumbled, knowing very well what his friend had in mind with that joke. “How my friends, who have never cracked a good joke in their entire lives, suddenly become the best comedians when it comes to situations like these.”

Mark didn’t reply to it with anything more than a smile, and Jinyoung sighed, waiting for that damn doctor to come here as soon as possible. The atmosphere in the ward was becoming weird and awkward – he was trying (and failing) to pretend that he wasn’t glimpsing at Mark from time to time, while the latter was back to his phone, texting someone and occasionally flashing a smile or two reading responses. Jinyoung caught himself wondering who he was texting, and if his head wasn’t pounding in pain, he would’ve slapped himself for such thoughts. _He didn’t care about whom Mark is texting._

The doctor wasn’t about to show up anytime soon, it seemed, and Mark had gone somewhere for a while. Jinyoung thought that he went to check when they’ll be good to go, but Mark returned alone; only with an apologetic smile and two cups – coffee for himself and a cup of tea for Jinyoung, accompanied by a cookie he got from a vending machine on the other side of the corridor.

“Thanks,” Jinyoung mumbled, when he got all of this put in his hands. “But I don’t drink green—“

“You don’t drink green tea, I know. This one is from some fruits, and least the label said so.” And there it was, Mark confirming that he still remembered those small things about his former best friend, at least some of them, and it made Jinyoung borderline uncomfortable, because he, on the other hand, knew shit about who Mark was now. “They didn’t have any sugar though, so it probably will taste better with that cookie.”

Suddenly, Jinyoung’s stomach reminded how hungry he actually was, what was more than understandable knowing that the last proper meal he had that wasn’t a rice cake of any sorts, was probably yesterday evening; so he didn’t think twice before ripping the package apart.

“Do you—“ He started, and immediately regretted this decision, because Mark’s brown eyes were looking directly at him with a questioning stare, waiting for him to elaborate. At first Jinyoung wanted to stay silent, however, after a few moments of silence, he forced himself to finish the sentence and even sound kind of nice on top of that. “Maybe you want a half of that? It’s just that I… Noticed that you didn’t bring anything for yourself… And the day was probably pretty long, and—“ The more he spoke, the more stupid it sounded and the more Jinyoung wanted for the floor to open and swallow him like quicksand.

“You’re pretty nice when you show that you know more words than good morning and goodnight.” Mark didn’t miss the chance to tease him a bit. After that he tried to refuse, saying that the cookie is Jinyoung’s, however, the younger was just as persistent, kind of hoping this half of a cookie will be enough of a thank you gift for taking care of him, and that after they come back to the dorm they won’t really need to interact any more.

Only when Mark finally gave in and came to take it, Jinyoung noticed that the guy’s fingers were all full of cuts, the wounds fresh and some still having bits of blood on them. “What’s that?” The question escaped his lips against his will, because prior to that Jinyoung swore not to say a word anymore, since every time he opened his mouth, he made a fool out of himself.

Mark’s smile didn’t budge, and Jinyoung silently wondered if he smiles like that twenty four-seven, taking a short glimpse at his hand. He shrugged and munching on the cookie, answered, “Got a few cuts because of all that glass around you in the festival, nothing serious. It should heal soon.”

“I’m sorry.”

Jinyoung really did feel guilty and sorry about it, who wouldn’t, seeing a person with wounded fingers due to your absent-minded self. He probably even _looked_ guilty, since Mark let out a slight laugh, as if trying to reassure him.

“It’s okay, Jinyoung, really.”

“Why were you there, in the festival?” Jinyoung suddenly asked, thinking that later he will be able to say that it was because of his possible concussion. “I didn’t see your name in the list of people going.”

Mark’s eyebrows rose a bit, probably because of the surprise that Jinyoung cared enough to search for his name in that list, but soon he got himself together and replied with a lighthearted, “So you checked, huh? I can bet that if you saw my name there, you wouldn’t have gone.” He was one hundred percent right, but Jinyoung wasn’t about to tell him that. “But considering how it all ended, I think it might’ve been a better idea. Anyway, there’s this universities’ fair going on as a part of the festival, so some fourth years went separately from you all, to represent ours, all that stuff. I was the only med student out there, so they put me into the first-aid tent, saying that there won’t be anything to do and I’ll be able to just chill there. They were clearly wrong though.” He finished with a laugh.

The doctor finally came to the ward to do the last check-up on Jinyoung a few minutes later, and the latter embarrassed himself yet again, subconsciously grabbing the nearest object when the doctor checked bandages on his stitched wound. It hurt as hell and that nearest object was a sleeve of Mark’s shirt, unfortunately, Jinyoung noticed it only a few moments later, letting go of it with in such speed, it seemed like it was scalding his hand.

In the end, it wasn’t a concussion; and even though he felt like dying, Jinyoung had to admit that for a person who just casually walked into a piece of thick glass and managed to shatter it to pieces, he was feeling pretty okay, except from this weird feeling that something wasn’t right.

During the span of the last hour, he a) talked with Mark Tuan like a decent human being, b) took a cup of tea and a cookie from him and even shared it, c) let out a soft smile when they were getting out of the hospital to catch a bus back to Seoul and Mark grabbed his shoulder to guide him, before Jinyoung got to the wrong direction – and that made him wondering whether Icheon doctors actually missed that concussion in his tests after all.

 

Things weren’t that tragic – Jinyoung got a week long excuse from homework because of his trauma that mysteriously got worse every time he entered a classroom, the headache becoming unbearable exactly at the same time when professors would ask him something.

Things weren’t bad with Mark as well – it didn’t seem like a lot changed in their relationship, as they still barely talked to each other, but Jinyoung didn’t set his alarm clocks to 5 AM anymore so that he could sneak out of the room earlier than his roommates and wouldn’t need to greet Mark; but that was about it. And Jinyoung still felt content with that.

“You know, I liked you more when you were unconscious on the way to the hospital.” Jackson slurred to him one late Friday night, when Jinyoung, who still was advised not to drink much thanks to his glass adventures, was dragging him back to the dorm from a party. “ _That_ Jinyoung wouldn’t be stalling.”

“Yeah, because he would be unconscious and unable to say no.” Jinyoung mumbled under his breath, cursing all the people who thought it was a great idea to build a campus on a damn hill. “Where on earth did you even get this idea?”

Jackson drunkenly shrugged, throwing his arm around Jinyoung’s shoulders and dragging him closer to whisper, as if was a secret. “I talked with Jaebum about it.” Jinyoung sighed at this, because sure, Jackson getting closer to his best friend was always a good thing if Jaebum was serious about making some moves, when it was obvious that he was smitten like a teenager. But at the same time he wasn’t sure how troublesome this combination might’ve been. “He said he’d be down for it.”

“Then why don’t you do this together?” Jinyoung humorously suggested, but he already imagined saying that to Jaebum and not seeing the end of disbelieving “how dare you to ditch me” and dramatic “I can’t do that alone”. Unexpectedly, he got the exact same reaction from his roommate as well.

“We can’t do that _alone_.” Jackson said, for some reason quietly, without his drunken enthusiasm. “It would look kind of awkward for us to go on a road trip together, like… he’s always been more your friend than mine.”

He might’ve had a point here, because Jaebum indeed was more of _Jinyoung’s friend_ – he and Jackson never hung out together if Jinyoung wasn’t present, even though they didn’t have problems occupying themselves with random small talk whenever Jaebum would come by to visit his best friend. This evening wasn’t an exception either – all three of them went to the same party, and Jackson exchanged only a few phrases with Jaebum at first; however, it seemed like when Jinyoung strayed away from them to talk to other friends, they got hammered and engaged into creating this plan.

“So basically you’re asking me to be your third wheel in case things go south.” Jinyoung teased, while they were waiting for an elevator to come. “Nice to see my place in this friendship.”

Jackson took this joke a little too personally, clutching his heart and swearing it wasn’t like that, they just came up with an awesome idea of how to spend that one and a half week they had free from studies, some sort of their university-only spring break. “Besides, you wouldn’t be the only one going, I think some of my other friends would like to go as well.”

“I’ll think about that. I actually planned on studying during that week, because I’m quite behind with all that homework skipping.”

Jackson only rolled his eyes at that, stumbling into their room as quietly as possible, it resulting only in him walking into a wall in the dark and accidentally hitting the light switch, followed by his laughing fit; Jinyoung was ready to say his apologies to Mark, who always went to sleep quite early, but then he saw that Mark’s bed is empty.

That’s right, he thought, looking at how Jackson was struggling to get into the top bunk of their bed, Mark had a life asides this room as well.

It took two weeks for Jinyoung to finally have his stitches removed and be convinced to agree to go on that road trip, his friends swearing that it is going to be super fun. They picked a bunch of cities they wanted to visit, most of them being places where Jackson, despite living in Korea for the last three or four years, had never been to.

“We can start with Jeonju, then get ourselves to Gwangju and then we’ll drop Youngjae off in Mokpo.” Jackson offered, when the trio of them were sitting down in Jaebum’s room with their laptops and notebooks three days before the trip, to properly plan the route and book places to stay. “And then we can go to, I don’t know, straight to Busan?”

“The bus from Mokpo to Busan will take us about five hours.” Jaebum told after a few mouse clicks. “Why everything in this country has to be so far.”

Jinyoung thought that it might be the time to start asking the right questions. “Who’s Youngjae?”

“One of Jackson’s friends that will be going with us. Not for the whole trip, only till we reach Mokpo, since wants to visit his family. Bonus, because we won’t need to search for a place to stay there, he said we can sleep at his place.” Surprisingly, it was Jaebum who answered, and Jinyoung frowned, wondering how did he obtain such information. “And then from Busan we can go to… Where?”

“Pohang?” Jackson’s pick was literally just him pointing a finger to any random city in the map above Busan, but none of them argued.

The entire plan, even though not really thought out properly (“If we won’t find any decent hostels, we can just sleep on some bench, nights are warm already.” Jackson said, when it turned out that all the hostels in Sokcho were either already booked or cost their liver and souls.), was finally written down in a few hours, Jackson assuring everyone that his friends who were supposed to join them will agree with whatever they decide. Jinyoung was quite surprised that in total there were seven people going, but the more the merrier, he thought.

Mark wasn’t around for the entire weekend before their trip and Jinyoung was kind of happy about the lack of distractions, because they were drowning in last minute preparations and panicking – one reservation in Pohang was lost for some reason and Jinyoung had to re-book everything again.

But that early Monday morning, around 4:50 AM when his alarm went off, earning a sleepy grunt from Jackson, he felt kind of excited. Trying to navigate through the darkness to a subway station when Jaebum and Jackson were half-asleep was a difficult task that lessened his enthusiasm though, especially when they passed out in the train and Jinyoung for a second started panicking he won’t be able to wake them up on time to get off in the right station.

They were supposed to meet the rest of the guys in the bus terminal, since they were leaving from another university station, but the trio arrived a little bit too early, so after buying bus tickets Jaebum and Jackson fell asleep again in the waiting area. The sight was kind of cute, because Jackson was unknowingly leaning on Jaebum’s shoulder and Jinyoung was already getting ready for a week worth of suffering themed “Two people have a crush on each other, but one doesn’t know yet and the other is in denial”.

Slowly, one by one, Jackson’s friends were starting to arrive to the meeting place as well; the first one being this guy named Yugyeom, a modelling major in some university and it was Jinyoung’s first time hearing such major, but he didn’t ask much questions after greeting him. Jackson opened his eyes only to say a quick and sleepy hi and passed out again, still leaning on Jaebum's shoulder.

Then Choi Youngjae followed, a first year music psychology major, and a Thai guy who kept telling them to call him Bambam, who was attending Korean language courses in hopes of passing the requirements to enroll into a university here.

Jaebum eventually woke up from his nap and took the role of the oldest, counting all the heads to see if there was someone missing. It didn’t seem like he noticed anything, so Jinyoung pointed out, “There has to be seven of us, someone’s missing.”

His best friend, however, for some reason avoiding eye contact, checked his phone and told only, “He said he’s coming. Got into a traffic jam, since he took a cab instead of subway.”

Jinyoung was getting impatient, because their bus was supposed to leave in fifteen minutes, but the mysterious guy was nowhere to be found until a few minutes later, Jackson, looking somewhere behind Jinyoung, exclaimed, “Here you are, I thought you’re going to ditch us!”

Jinyoung turned around to greet the guy and a bottle of water he just bought from a small shop nearby so he wouldn’t need to turn his neatly packed backpack upside down in the bus, slipped out of his hand, the water splashing everywhere on the floor, earning a round of wild laughter at his uncharacteristic clumsiness.

It was Mark with a backpack on his shoulders, now giving a high-five to Jackson instead of a greeting, and nodding to Jinyoung with a wide and perky smile on his lips.

Needless to say, the opportunity of excusing himself to visit a bathroom and then fleeing away, ditching this entire bunch of people, has never seemed more attractive to Jinyoung before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, maybe the idea of naming the chapters after cities won't happen, or it will get too repetitive.  
> jinyoung's suffering is never ending lmao and eventually he'll regret fucking up the reservations in Pohang, but that's for later :))))))  
> anyway, i hope yall liked it and comments are always welcomed!
> 
> p.s.: we have some progress, this one was written while listening to wee woo and russian roulette instead of as if it is your last. i just need cute songs to write something that's supposed to be fluff ok.


	4. Chapter 4

Two hours and approximately forty minutes – that was the amount of time Jinyoung had to feel sulky and mad about Mark joining their trip.

He didn’t even have to hide it - due to an odd number of travelers, someone from their group had to sit alone; Yugyeom was sitting with Bambam, everyone was threatened by Jaebum’s not so subtle stare indicating that if he didn’t get to sit with Jackson, he would kill them all in their sleep. Mark was caught up in some discussion with Youngjae so they ended up sitting together as well.

Jinyoung didn’t mind this sitting arrangement in the slightest – some alone time to sulk was exactly what he needed since he couldn’t ditch the trip after all; Jaebum, probably sensing the possibility, was holding a strap of his backpack up until they boarded the bus.

Asides that (and a few episodes of paranoia thinking that Mark was glancing at him a few times when he thought Jinyoung wasn’t looking), he had to admit that the overall trip to Jeonju went pretty smoothly, considering how prone the bigger part of their crew were to accidents – they didn’t get late to the bus, they even boarded the _right one_ , even though Jackson did have to run after Yugyeom and Bambam, who almost departed to another side of the country by accident. The bus didn’t crash and they reached the city safely – they were definitely off to a decent start.

Jinyoung, thanks to everyone letting people who were sitting in the back get out of the bus first, had a quick glimpse at his friends while passing by – Jackson was helping Jaebum to zip up his backpack, Bambam was basically on the floor trying to reach his bag he accidentally kicked too far under another seat. Youngjae and Mark seemed to be sleeping, sharing the same set of earphones.

Jinyoung only slightly raised his eyebrows at this, failing to remember when those two became such close friends to share earphones, but he told himself he didn’t really care, simply tapping Youngjae’s shoulder to wake him up.

“So, where do we need to be now?” Bambam asked, when they all were finally out of the bus, yawning and trying to stretch their bodies, stiff from almost a three hours long trip.

“I suggest we find our hostel, leave our bags there and go do some sightseeing?” Jinyoung said while Jaebum continued his dad tendencies and was counting people, making sure no one got lost yet.

Jackson dramatically sighed. “Sightseeing? Can we do something cool for once? I didn’t get here just to visit museums, you know.”

Jinyoung, probably due to lack of sleep, irritation after seeing Mark so unexpectedly and knowing that they were stuck together for one long week, immediately was up for an argument. “And I didn’t get here to keep you from trouble in clubs.”

“Okay, kids, save your arguments for when we’ll be deciding what’s for dinner.” This time it was Mark who interrupted them, knowing Jinyoung’s temper better than probably anyone here and not wanting to have fights starting form the first day. “We can go check in, do some sightseeing and then do something else in the evening, no need to fight about that.”

Jackson agreed after an eye roll and even Jinyoung had to agree it sounded fair, others either didn’t really care where to go or what to do, or were just watching the argument silently, not wanting to add any fuel to it.

“Let’s go.” Jaebum told, holding his phone. “I have a map in my phone, now let’s pray we won’t get lost on our way.”

The distance from the bus terminal to the hostel they chose wasn’t a short one, definitely, leading them through various quite shady districts; there wasn’t a lot of people, at least compared with Seoul at 11 AM on Monday, so it felt even empty.

At some point of walking around, Jaebum admitted that he was terribly lost and didn’t even know what part of the city they were in. It took a few minutes for them to find out that the situation wasn’t _that_ bad, they just needed to go to the opposite direction, but just to be safer, Youngjae took over the map app, because it felt like he at least knew how it worked.

The rest of their walk was uneventful, Jinyoung had some small talk with Yugyeom and Bambam; he learned they were best friends, and, how they called themselves, brothers that came from different families. It was heartwarming, but still made Jinyoung a bit sad, because all this best friend talk somehow reminded him of Mark, who was now entertaining Jackson with some story, earning Jaebum’s uncontrollable jealous stares.

“Subtlety is the key, friend.” Jinyoung sarcastically patted his best friend on the back. “A few more stares and you won’t even need to confess.”

“Confess what.” Jaebum mumbled, after looking around to make sure no one was listening to their conversation, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans, obviously not amused.

Jinyoung only shook his head, turning to Youngjae, who once again asked him to make sure that the address of the hostel was written correctly. “Denial was cute when we were, like, fifteen.”

“Yeah, and you’re _definitely_ the one to teach me that.”

Jinyoung didn’t bother to acknowledge the phrase, even though Youngjae glanced at them a little bit weirdly, not sure what was going on, but everyone in this trip had to be blind and deaf not to notice what was happening with Jaebum and Jackson, even though no one said anything out loud.

They finally reached their place to stay after a ten or fifteen more minutes, all of them already fed up with walking and tired from lack of sleep during what was supposed to be their holiday. The owner of the hostel was super nice and since there weren’t that many tourists that day, they got a ten bed dorm room for themselves for the same price, what was a good thing as well.

It would seem like there were enough beds to choose from, so a bunch of grown up college students won’t run like crazy to call dibs on them – however, the entire corridor of the third floor was now full of screams and laughter, some gentle physical fights as well, with Youngjae trying to squeeze himself in between Yugyeom and Jaebum so he could get nearer the door, thus getting a better chance at barging into the room first, however, none of the guys were about give up on their positions as well.

“You all seem to forget that I’m the one with the key.” Jackson grinned, holding the key up so everyone could see it. “Now, what do you have to offer for me to even open the door?”

Everyone was shouting such offers as doing his homework for the entire semester coming from Mark, and treating him to dinner from Jinyoung, who got dragged into this madness without even him noticing, and then Bambam decided to play dirty - while Jackson was considering Jinyoung’s promise to buy him meat, he sneaked from behind and snatched the key right from Jackson’s hand, sending everyone into a round of uncontrollable laughter.

Finally, the door was unlocked and a herd of guys got in, still screaming and laughing; Jackson tried to throw his backpack on the bed he wanted to get from a distance of, like, five meters, and majestically failed, the backpack almost smashing a window. Youngjae jumped into the top bunk of the bed which was the closest to air conditioner, Bambam and Yugyeom chose the bed next to the same window that was in danger a few seconds ago. Jackson, admitting his defeat, put his things on the bed in the very corner, with Mark occupying the top bunk of it. Jaebum, surprise surprise, picked the one just a few steps away from theirs, and Jinyoung established his place in the bed near the door, declaring the rest of the beds being a storage for their bags and other stuff.

It took a while for them to unpack, since they were about to stay here for two days, and when Jaebum was about to ask where on earth should they go sightseeing, they unexpectedly had to change their plans – mostly because Youngjae fell asleep while trying to catch the wifi and they didn’t want to leave him behind, so everyone unanimously agreed that a short two hours long nap had to come first.

The room quieted down soon, but a few minutes into it Jinyoung felt like he won’t be able to sleep anyway, it was too cold to sleep since Youngjae set the aircon temperature a bit too low, however, no one had the heart to wake the guy up to fix this, since only he knew where the remote control was.

Jinyoung was doing what seemed like his thousandth roll in his bed trying to fall asleep in these conditions, especially when Jaebum was already snoring, when he felt someone standing next to him. When he turned around, his heart jumped because it was Mark, holding a spare blanket that he had in his bags, saying, “Take this.”

“Th— Thanks.” Jinyoung mumbled, but it didn’t seem like Mark was listening, rubbing his sleepy eyes and returning back to bed.

The blanket had a scent of Mark’s perfume on it and Jinyoung got weirded out, feeling almost like he was sharing the bed with his childhood friend. He didn’t have time to think about it though, dozing off a few minutes later.

Their alarms went off exactly two hours later, even Jackson didn’t have much trouble waking up, what was automatically a miracle, and off they went after Jinyoung googled some places for them to visit.

They ended up visiting a folk village nearby first; Bambam got excited after hearing that some popular Korean drama was filmed in it, and started taking photos of every possible thing he could find, with a plan of sending it all to his mother, who apparently was a Korean drama fan. They spent some time walking around the museum in the village, staring at ancient findings and some notes explaining everything, one of them making Jackson frown in disbelief.

“It says that all these dudes,” he pointed at some figurines that were supposed to recreate some kind of a tradition, “Were gathered only to transport a painting of some king from one place to another several times a year. Who needs hundreds of people just to carry a damn _painting_?”

Youngjae joined him too look at it as well, saying. “Well, look at it from the brighter side, hyung. Imagine being that king whose portrait they were carrying. If you have so many people only to carry your face, imagine how you yourself would be treated.”

“Wow.” Jackson’s eyes got wider, imagining things. “King Jackson, I kind of like the sound of it.”

“They’d probably behead you three days into the reign for some dumb shit, just saying.” Jinyoung laughed passing by and Jackson looked at him with a sour expression.

Mark was always a few steps behind him though, and it kind of irked Jinyoung, but he didn’t show it, pretending that some old transcripts about how many donkeys some ruler had were way more interesting. Their museum visiting ended early though, after Yugyeom was thrown out for trying to take photos of something that had a clear sign of “no photos allowed”.

It was already evening, when they were done climbing every possible hill in the folk village to see how the city looked from the top and take a few occasional group photos, Jinyoung trying his best to be on the opposite side than Mark in every one of them. Jackson decided that he was too tired and his legs were burning too much to go clubbing, so they agreed on making a little feast in their hostel room instead of that.

“There’s not much we can bring back there, asides ramen and some takeouts, if we find them.” Mark noted, when they all were sitting on a bench on a hill they just climbed trying to figure out what to have for dinner, the first official one of this trip.

“To be honest, I’d eat like five bowls of ramen right now without even chewing, thanks for bringing it up.” Jaebum started talking louder to hide the sounds of his growling stomach. “I haven’t eaten since yesterday evening.”

Luckily, they found some chicken delivery number in a leaflet that was comfortably left on the ground next to the bench as if for them to find, and they hoped for the number to work; some of them found a few restaurants to order something else in case the chicken didn’t work out, and Mark asked, “I need to find a convenience store before going back, does anyone want anything?

“Maybe.” Jackson shrugged. “We can take a few bottles of soju or something, to celebrate the holidays, you know?”

Jinyoung was quick to protest. “No offense, but there are kids here.” He said, thinking of everyone that wasn’t at least twenty-one in this bunch of people as of toddlers.

“No offense, hyung,” Bambam told, mimicking his voice, “But those kids were already doing questionable things way before _you_ turned legal, so relax a bit.”

Jinyoung needed a few short moments to hide his perplexed face and a few longer ones to be fully convinced, because he wasn’t fond of the idea of drinking here in the first place. He had an idea how terrible it would be getting wasted in an unfamiliar city, but in the end he agreed, not even noticing how he turned to Mark to say, “No soju for them though, search for the weakest beer for them or something, alcohol-free even.” It made them laugh again, even if Mark’s laughter came quite delayed after a bit of poorly hidden surprise that Jinyoung was talking to him.

The chicken delivery number turned out to be working, so they ended up with tons of food, trying to make somewhat a circle on the floor in the room. They had some trouble with that, because there wasn’t much space to begin with, but they somehow managed to fit everything. Mark and Jaebum, who offered to go with the latter to the convenience store, returned right on time to see Jackson doing an impersonation of sleeping Jaebum, and if it wasn’t for the hidden fact that Jaebum had a hopeless crush, he probably would’ve been dead already, even though, in Jinyoung and Youngjae’s opinion, the impersonation _was_ accurate.

The latecomers joined the circle and Yugyeom told it feels like they belonged to some black magic cult, ready to summon demons. Jaebum laughed at that, trying to find a pair of chopsticks. “Actually, I think we did that in the second year of high school, didn’t we, Jinyoung?” The latter nodded, the memory of that day was still terrifying. “He ran out of the basement screeching, though.” Jaebum added, now munching on a chicken wing.

“Well fuck you too.” Jinyoung bit back. “You were trying to convince your parents to move out of the country being sure that a demon cursed you.”

Jaebum was never known for filtering his words, especially when he was busy enjoying the bliss of stuffing his stomach, so a few moments later Jinyoung suddenly felt the urge for the floor to open and swallow his best friend alive. “Couldn’t leave you alone in this country, that shit would’ve hurt.”

An awkward silence ensued after he realized what he said, with Youngjae, Yugyeom and Bambam having no clue what just happened, Mark suddenly not being able to lift his stare from the cup of ramen he was eating and Jinyoung, awkwardly clearing his throat. Luckily, the situation was saved by Jackson, who immediately took a cue to raise his bottle of soju, offering a toast. “To the most awesome trip ever and not so awesome friends. But I still love you all already, so there’s that.”

Although happy to change the topic, everyone rolled their eyes and for a while the room was full of the sounds of bottles and beer cans clinking against each other, until Yugyeom decided that they needed some music, ready to offer his entire playlist, however, Bambam snatched his phone earlier than he managed to move, telling, “We’re not listening to the entire discography of Chris Brown, I suffer enough of that on a daily basis, thank you.”

“And I’m _not_ listening to Bieber.” Yugyeom fired back, and they were about to get into a fight, because he wanted to get his phone back, until Jaebum sighed, having to leave the ramen he was now eating to get up and separate them like troublesome kids.

“Everyone gets three songs of their choice to download into my phone and I’ll put them on shuffle, so it would be fair.” He said, feeling like in a kindergarten, sending his phone in a circle and smiling when Jackson complained about a separate password for the photo gallery to keep people like him away.

Nobody knew what songs were downloaded as everyone deleted every possible notifications about it for the sake of surprise, and Jaebum finally pressed play after a few minutes.

The first song that came up was some of Chris Brown, what made Bambam roll on the floor, wailing “ _just kill me_ ”. Jinyoung’s song picks were literally the first three trendy ones that popped up in his head, so he got surprised that one of his favorite older songs suddenly started playing. It was really old, released when he was barely a teenager, and it suddenly hit him that Mark probably was the one who downloaded it, because he definitely had to know it, and others didn’t seem to enjoy that kind of songs, but he tried to ignore this thought.

Feeling the joys of a full stomach, they had a few rounds of sharing ridiculous stories – from how a teenager Yugyeom was thrown out of his house completely naked when he came back home later than he agreed with his parents to a toddler Youngjae getting stuck after climbing a tree and having a whole fire department of their district trying to take him down. The only people who didn’t talk much about their childhood were none other than Jinyoung and Mark, mostly because their stories involved each other in one way or another, and no one wanted to bring them up. But.

“Wait, you both know each other, right?” Youngjae pointed at them. Both of the guys nodded, waiting to see if an elaboration was needed, but it wasn’t, and they were more than happy with that. “I’m just trying to understand who knew who before this trip. So Jackson knew Jaebum hyung, you both knew each other, I knew Yugyeom and Jackson knew both— It doesn’t make any sense anymore, I’m lost.” And maybe it was due to the fact that Youngjae was quite tipsy.

“It would be fun to play some truth or dare, or something, considering most of us here know someone’s secrets.” Jaebum suddenly said.

“Yeah no.” Jinyoung said, excusing himself to the bathroom. “Some confessions might slip out by accident.” No one understood what he had in mind, especially when Busan accent came out thanks to him being tipsy as well, except for Jaebum, who mouthed a sweet “fuck you” to him.

When he returned from bathroom, some of them were engaged in a semi-drunken rap battle that was quickly put to an end when Bambam and Yugyeom’s duo unexpectedly roasted Jaebum’s ass with a diss, both of the guys having to run for their lives as they were threatened to find those used chopsticks in places it shouldn’t be stuck in, but Jaebum was full of nothing but empty threats, as always; and it was kind of surprising that seven people could be getting along so well despite being so different. Well, some things had to be worked on, but they were okay with it.

Jinyoung finally decided that it was enough partying for him when he found himself dozing off leaned against a wall. While he was taking a quick shower in that cramped shower shared with the entire floor, the rest of the guys started getting ready to sleep too – Yugyeom and Bambam were in Yugyeom’s bed watching some youtube video, Youngjae was in his pajamas searching for earplugs in his bag (“I’m not listening to Jaebum hyung’s snoring again.”); the only ones not sleepy at all were Jackson and Jaebum, now sitting on the floor next to Jackson’s bed and talking about something, some random outbursts of laughter escaping their mouths.

The way Jaebum looked at Jackson when the latter didn’t see was cute though, Jinyoung had to give them that.

“Hey.” He heard Mark’s voice next to him again, the guy now leaning in closer, so that no one would hear. “I see what’s up with those two, so maybe you won’t mind if I take the top bunk of your bed tonight? Yours doesn’t have that many stuff on it, and they will be able to spend some time together, I just don’t want to make it obvious by starting to clean a whole separate bed from our bags to sleep in it.”

Mark was always like that – considerate and ready to go an extra mile if there was something needed to be done about the situation, and his plan didn’t sound completely stupid, so Jinyoung nodded. “Yeah, sure.”

Soon, the lights were turned off and the only audible sound was that unbearable giggling from Jaebum and Jackson, to which Bambam sleepily groaned, “Will you two ever shut up, I’m trying to sleep.”

Jinyoung was about to drift away to his dreamland, when Mark for some reason leaned over from his bed, ridiculously close to falling off of it and whispered, “Goodnight, Jinyoung.”

It wasn’t without a bit of hesitation and awkward pauses, but eventually Jinyoung responded, “Goodnight,” trying to doze off immediately after, as if his brain would be shutting down in order not to overthink it.

However, they all were woken up approximately four hours later by terrified Bambam for some reason screaming in the bathroom, but what scared Jinyoung wasn’t that – it was the fact that Mark’s blanket still was wrapped around him and he was tightly clutching onto it, as if not wanting to let it go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> no one in this story is as subtle as they'd want to be lmao  
> i thought it would be hard for me to write this chapter, but then when i started editing i was like "holy shit how to fit into like 4k of it" lmao and here's the outcome.  
> i hope yall liked it, excuse the possible typos, and comments are always welcomed, now excuse me, i myself have a bowl of almost 1 am ramen to finish


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter in a nutshell: too much fuss over a damn blanket feat. "why didn't someone tell me to write this fic while listening to the markjin anthem Higher before, because it would've solved like 95% of my inspiration problems".

Bambam’s shrieking wasn’t due to anything _that_ terrible – turned out, he woke up to pee and accidentally lifted his eyes to look up at a mirror only to see something reminding of a very realistic bug painted on his cheek with a permanent marker.

It resulted in the entire floor of the hostel being woken up to confirm that no one was getting murdered in the shared bathroom that night; though the real culprits, who fell asleep not bothering to hide the marker properly, Jaebum and Jackson, didn’t even budge in their beds (or bed, since they, technically, fell asleep in the same one). All of them, laughing the initial scare off, decided that it probably was a revenge for all those remarks of Bambam’s, telling them to shut up and let him sleep.

“How am I supposed to wipe it off?” Bambam whined, the sound of it appearing more like of a wild animal growling than an actual whine due to the 6 AM sleepiness. They tried everything – water, soap, wet tissues, Yugyeom even tried to convince his friend to wash his face with cola, because “that shit takes off everything”, however, to no avail, Jackson and Jaebum made sure it would be a hell to remove.

“Try rubbing alcohol.” Youngjae mumbled, getting back to bed, hair sticking into various directions and eyes bloodshot, the guy regretting all the soju shots he took earlier in the night. “And don’t wake me up till the evening, I don’t want to see any of you.”

The suggestion wasn’t exactly helpful, since even Jinyoung, the most responsible person in this trip, in his own humble opinion, after throwing his entire backpack upside down had to admit that he didn’t have anything similar. Mark as well, and when Bambam mumbled that he’s a damn med student, he told only, “That’s doesn’t mean I’m carrying an entire surgery kit with me everywhere I go.”

Jinyoung, still freaking out about the _blanket situation_ how he called it, tried to ignore Mark’s entire existence, pretending he wasn’t doing that because of his own thoughts, but only because Bambam’s problems were more important. “Go to the reception, I’m sure they must have first-aid kits. You should find rubbing alcohol there.”

“Yeah, and make a fool of myself with a fucking fake bug on my face, great. Assholes.” Bambam replied, kicking Jackson and Jaebum’s bed, but that resulted only in him screeching from pain because he hurt his toes, Jaebum mumbling something in his sleep and Youngjae throwing one of his pillows at them.

The room quieted down soon as Bambam decided that he can embarrass himself in the reception a bit later, at decent human hours, so they all returned to their beds. At first, Jinyoung was determined to simply wrap himself in blankets and pass out till midday, but soon he remembered whom the blanket belonged to, so he tossed it away from himself as far as possible, as if it was a huge spider threatening to kill him while he was asleep.

Despite all the attempts though, Jinyoung couldn’t close his eyes at all, rewinding memories of Mark being so close around him, doing all those things – he always was the first one to help if Jinyoung would forget to bring a towel to the bathroom in their dorm; he always made sure that Jinyoung wouldn’t sleep through his alarms, at least those that didn’t set off at 5 AM.

He never did that obviously, never forced himself into the private space of his former best friend – he’d leave extra towels in the bathroom or he would just slam the bathroom door a little louder so that Jinyoung would wake up on time, something like that.

Now as well, Mark was nothing but always willing to help, even if it was only a stupid blanket, and what bothered Jinyoung the most, was the fact that he realized he didn’t hate Mark for it; rather than that, he felt sorry.

Objectively speaking, he couldn’t be the only one affected when Mark needed to move back to the States; Mark had lost a best friend as well, and family circumstances that made him leave definitely wasn’t a thing for Jinyoung to be petty about just because he didn’t have a person to get in trouble with for a few months, till Jaebum moved to the neighborhood.

Several minutes later, Jinyoung, on the verge of finally passing out, thought that all of this, the trip, change of scenery and nice spring weather with sunshine already dripping into the room, was only making him too soft.

When he woke up a little before eleven, more than half of the beds were already empty, there was only him, Jackson who still was lazing around in the bed, and Youngjae, who seemed like he’s going to stay true to his promise to sleep until the evening.

“Where’s everyone?” He silently asked, after taking a not so subtle glimpse at where Mark was supposed to be sleeping; thankfully he wasn’t there.

“Everyone decided to have their alone time, I guess.” Jackson shrugged, finally getting up and bumping his head into the top bunk. “That’s why I hate bunk beds.” He complained, rubbing his forehead.

“Serves you right though. I thought Bambam will scream his vocal cords off.”

Jackson only laughed, ignoring it. “Anyway, he and Yugyeom said they’re probably going to look around in stores for some clothes, Jaebum went for a walk, and I don’t know where Mark is, I didn’t really ask.”

Jinyoung wasn’t against the idea of spending some time alone either, since being stuck with a bunch of people all the time wasn’t the greatest idea ever – it was more than easy to get sick of each other like that, and he _especially_ didn’t mind not knowing where Mark was. The less thinking about him, the better.

“Wait, is that Mark’s blanket?” Jackson said after Jinyoung took a shower and was making his bed. His voice sounded weird, exactly like he would be wondering what on earth went wrong with this world _and_ like he’d be slightly making fun of his roommate, whose cheeks immediately flamed up with a pink tint, though Jinyoung would've liked to put the blame for the blushing on the air conditioner that someone turned off; it was just _too hot in the room._

Eventually, he decided to admit the truth, knowing that Jackson will see right through his lies anyway, they knew each other for too long not to know. “Yeah, I guess.”

“Do tell.” Jackson’s satisfied smile got even wider, much to Jinyoung’s disgust, while the latter was neatly folding the said blanket and putting it onto Mark’s bed.

“Nothing to tell. Yesterday when we all were napping, he thought I might feel cold, since Youngjae left the aircon blasting.” Jinyoung told, more to convince himself than his friend. His head was hurting due to lack of sleep and overanalyzing, so he didn’t want to get back there.

Jackson gave him one of those “are you kidding me right now” stares he was famous for. “Yeah, he just gave you a blanket, because he thought that our little fragile flower named Jinyoung won’t survive a two hour nap without freezing his ass off, sure. If he was so concerned about the temperature, why didn’t he give it, let’s say, to Yugyeom or whatever?”

“What are you implying?” Jinyoung swallowed, trying his best not to think, searching for a pair of his sneakers, as he was ready to go out for a walk himself.

“I’m implying that you’re stupid.”

“What’s the big deal, god damn it, he gave me a spare blanket, that’s all there is to it.”

“Thing is, my blind friend,” Jackson dramatically sighed, as if not believing his stupidity, “It’s not a _spare_ blanket, it’s the only blanket he took with himself. Mark sacrificed his own stuff to sleep in a terribly smelling, probably not washed for ages hostel blanket because of you.”

Jinyoung could swear that his heart started to beat so loud that everyone could’ve heard it without even trying to listen. “Bullshit.”

“Nope.” Jackson finished, heading to shower. “If you gave at least a tiny bit more shit about him on a daily basis, you’d know that it’s the same blanket he uses in the dorm, I’ve seen it countless times.

Jinyoung jumped from his place, ready to run away screaming, because Jackson was probably right, but before leaving he defensively said, “Well, at least I didn’t fell asleep with him in one bed, unlike you and Jaebum.”

“How the fuck is _that_ relevant to the topic?”

“Thing is, my blind friend,” Jinyoung sarcastically quoted, not even caring that he might be throwing his best friend under the bus for this; he just wanted to change the topic before his heart stopped, and everything was acceptable at that moment. “You’re just as stupid as I am.”

 

Jinyoung had absolutely no idea where he was going, he didn’t even bother to check the map. He was content with a long walk that was leading nowhere, because he needed time and activity to clear his mind from all the unnecessary thoughts. He knew the surroundings though, at least a little bit, he was sure they were here yesterday evening while walking back to the hostel.

His growling stomach eventually announced that it’d been too long since the last time Jinyoung ate, so he decided to crash a nearby convenience store whose ad he saw in the distance, a sandwich and a cup of hot coffee seeming like everything he needed at the moment. However, a few minutes later, it started to look like a huge mistake.

There were quite a few people in the store, mostly high schoolers with their uniforms and Jinyoung frowned at all the noise they were making. He picked his sandwich and waited for his coffee to be made by a machine, not really watching his surroundings, what was mistake number two. When he finally stood in the line to pay for all the goods in his hands, Jinyoung almost dropped everything on the floor, flinching and earning a few judgmental stares from the same high school students.

Of course, Mark was standing in the same line, with a cup of coffee in his hand and waiting for his turn to pay, out of all the convenience stores there could possibly be located in this district picking the same one as Jinyoung.

The latter was thinking about all the escape plans, because he was one hundred percent sure that thanks to his bad luck Mark will definitely notice him; he even thought about getting out of the line and hiding behind shelves until his roommate pays for his things and leaves. But soon he realized how dumb and embarrassing it would be, so Jinyoung just sighed and hoped for the best, the best that didn’t come after all, and it wasn’t even Mark’s fault. It was his own.

“Declined.” The cashier said to Mark when he tried to pay with his card. Mark was slightly confused about it, because he was sure it worked pretty fine yesterday, however after a few more attempts, the girl repeated, “Sorry, it still says declined. Do you perhaps have cash with you?”

Mark shook his head, because he wasn’t a fan of carrying cash around, especially while travelling. He was about to say something, when Jinyoung, watching all this, after a few moments of contemplation and nervous lip biting loudly exclaimed, “It’s okay, I’ll pay for that.”

It was only then when Mark noticed him, getting just as surprised as Jinyoung was earlier, but probably without ridiculous escape plans. “You don’t have to.” He said quickly, as people behind them in the line were starting to mumble and complain about the delay.                

“It’s fine.” Jinyoung said, giving the girl his own card, which worked without any problem. He himself didn’t really know why he did that – he could’ve waited for Mark to return his things and go, since it seemed like he really won’t notice Jinyoung; but maybe, it was some kind of way to return the favor for that blanket. Maybe.

“I don’t know what happened.” Mark said, when they finally got out of the store, much to the cashier and other customers’ relief. “It worked just fine yesterday and now it’s just… I’m sure my account isn’t empty though, it would be ridiculous if it suddenly got empty during the night.”

Jinyoung thought for a while before coming up with a theory, taking a sip of his coffee. “Show me your card a bit.” Mark, although a bit surprised about how casual Jinyoung was with him all of a sudden, didn’t show it, handing him the card, and Jinyoung nodded because he was right. “It’s a foreign card. Those don’t necessarily work everywhere, especially outside Seoul. I suggest you to find the nearest ATM that would work on your card and take out some cash. You might be having this trouble a lot.”

“Damn it.” Mark laughed at the absurdity of the situation. “I didn’t want to carry a bunch of important stuff with me, so I left all my cards in the dorm, and took the American one by mistake. Thanks though, you’re a lifesaver.”

Jinyoung didn’t reply to it, but even he couldn’t blame the weather anymore when his cheeks got red again. Mark didn’t mention it, even though he obviously noticed, and for a while they were walking like that, without any pre-decided destination, until Mark asked, “I hope you don’t mind that I tagged along like this?”

“No, of course not.” Jinyoung was so quick to answer that he almost choked on his coffee. “I mean, the more people traveling with us, the merrier, right?” It sounded so stupid, awkward and unnatural, he knew he was going to beat himself over it for ages.

“I meant now, since you were obviously walking alone, but…” Mark said. “Yeah, I guess that question works for the entire trip as well.”

Jinyoung thought he wished that the ground would open and swallow him alive a few times too many considering it’s been less than two days.

“I didn’t mean… I—“ At this point he himself didn’t know what on earth he was trying to say right now, stumbling over his own tongue more and more, making a fool out of himself again. “I don’t mind neither you travelling with us, nor taking a walk with me now, really.”

Jinyoung wasn’t sure if he meant that completely honestly though, but Mark’s face obviously brightened hearing it, his laugh became louder and smile got wider, what Jinyoung unsuccessfully trying to ignore. It was hard, when his childhood friend was trying to make him laugh with the weirdest facial expressions ever, and for a while it felt even nice and relaxing, like a throwback to their young days.

“How did you end up going, though?” Jinyoung breathed out the most important question that’s been on his mind ever since he saw Mark in the bus terminal yesterday, however, he never asked anyone, hoping to hide that he was so interested in the answer.

“I heard Jackson talking with Youngjae on the phone the other day, when you were out somewhere.” Mark replied, and Jinyoung tried not to think that he probably was out somewhere _hiding_ again. “They were talking about some kind of a road trip, and later I just asked what was that all about. He told me about the trip you all were planning and asked if I wanted to join.”

That sounded painfully a lot like Jackson Wang, being friendly to everyone anytime, so Jinyoung wasn’t even surprised, mostly because he knew that even if Mark refused at first, Jackson would’ve pestered him to the point of probably packing Mark’s backpack for him. That’s how Jinyoung ended up going after all.

“I agreed after he reassured that you won’t mind me going, but now it seems like he didn’t even ask you, judging from how you looked at me in the bus terminal.” Mark suddenly added, and the taste of the sandwich Jinyoung was eating became bitter.

“Why… Why did you think I’d be against?” He asked, immediately regretting the question, because he wasn’t ready to hear _because you were acting like an asshole for like a month, duh_ or something like that.

But Mark was always tactful and nice, wrapping his words into cotton candy to make it seem like everything wasn’t Jinyoung’s fault. “I just don’t want to make you uncomfortable, you know. The way our friendship ended wasn’t the nicest one, and I just kind of… Reappeared out of nowhere after all these years, no shit that you’d feel weirded out.”

Something inside Jinyoung sank a little at Mark declaring their previous friendship being over. He never thought about it that way – yes, they hadn’t talked for _years_ , they even stopped wishing each other happy birthdays, but Jinyoung still didn’t think about it as a dead friendship. Paused, put on halt – maybe, but probably… Probably Mark was right, maybe it was over indeed.

“Indeed.” He managed to say. “I was weirded out.”

Mark softly laughed. “You know what they say, some things have to fall apart for better ones to fall together. Maybe it was just better that way.”

“Yeah.” Jinyoung told, not even listening, just continuing to eat his food, the sandwich now for some reason tasting like plain wet paper.

It was awkward again, they were exchanging only a few default sentences about the scenery as they continued to walk around, making circles around the same neighborhood in order not to get lost. Mark spotted an ATM to take care of his card problems and Jinyoung waited for him with his stare locked on the pavement.

It was nearing lunch time, and since they all agreed to eat together (more like it was decided by Jackson, who sent everyone the same message telling to get their asses to the hostel, because they’re going out), Jinyoung and Mark were walking back, when the latter suddenly said, “Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah?” Jinyoung lifted his eyes, voice full of some weird and foreign anticipation.

“Yesterday, when we all were eating dinner…” Mark started after a bit of hesitation, words slow and coming off like he was still thinking about how to put it so his question would make sense. “When Jaebum said that thing about you being hurt if he moved out of the country… It seemed like it was kind of directed at me in a way. We used to get along quite nicely, everything seemed fine but…” He took a deep breath to finally finish his question. “Is he mad at me for something? Is that why he said it?”

_Oh._

The question wasn’t about Jinyoung, it was about his best friend. Mark wanted to know if _Jaebum_ was mad about something that happened way before he even started living in Seoul. Great.

“No, he’s not.” He responded, voice noticeably colder; he wasn’t even looking at Mark anymore, walking as fast as possible, so they’d return to the hostel quicker. “He just worded it weirdly, he didn’t mean anything bad. So no worries, _Jaebum_ isn’t mad at you.” He finished with a sarcastic smile.

They all got puzzled when Jinyoung refused to go eat lunch with them, telling everyone to leave him alone, not even giving in to Jaebum’s convincing to talk things out after everyone left them alone in the room, shrugging their shoulders about this anger fit. Jaebum talked mainly with Jinyoung’s back though, because the latter was facing the wall while lying in his bed, pretending to be asleep.

They all were still just as puzzled in the evening, because Mark wasn’t talking much either, Jackson for some reason was not so subtly avoiding Jaebum; it continued all the way to the next morning after checking out of the hostel and boarding a bus to yet another city.

Jaebum sent Jinyoung a text message when they were halfway Gwangju, asking for how long he was going to ignore him and everyone else for that matter. Jinyoung took out his phone to read it, but deleted the message right away, and everyone saw that.

 _Jaebum can talk with Mark, they’ve been doing that a lot anyway_ , he thought, even though he had no idea why he was this angry over one simple question.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh boi. jinyoung's mad, mark's confused, jaebum's confused, jackson's acting weird, youngjae probably is regretting his choice of befriending all of them, and it's not even the peak of mess :)))  
> no but seriously, Higher is a bop, i spent like 4hrs with it on repeat while editing and didn't get tired lmao
> 
> anyway, i'm shutting up, i hope you liked it, comments are especially welcomed


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> before we get into the chapter, a bit of shameless not markjin-related promo. there's a markbum fic fest that's now in the sign ups stage, so if you want to take a shot at it just hit the [twitter](https://twitter.com/markbumficfest) link for more info.
> 
> also, idek what this chapter is tbh, also notice those damn new tags :))

Their Gwangju part of the trip went relatively quietly, in all the possible meanings – there weren’t many things that could’ve happened during their few hours long stay, since they all decided to save some time and money, heading to Mokpo the same evening instead of being in Gwangju for two days like they initially planned.

There weren’t many things that could’ve happened in their relationships as well; well, maybe Jinyoung decided not to be such obvious pain in the ass, simply isolating himself and taking a walk around the city alone, asides that talking only a little and only if there was no way to avoid it – and sometimes there wasn’t, because all the hostel bookings up until their return to Seoul were done in his name; that probably was the only reason why he didn’t ditch the remaining trip in the first place.

Jinyoung, walking around in some museum and looking at a random painting two hours till their departure to Youngjae’s hometown, wasn’t exactly sure why he was feeling so angry about Mark thinking that Jaebum was mad at him. Jinyoung didn’t even think he was mad actually, it just felt unfair – after not speaking with each other for years, asking how _Jaebum_ was feeling, especially when a few months earlier the latter knew Mark only from those few stories Jinyoung was forced to tell him, was definitely _unfair._  

He got so deep into his thoughts, just standing still in front of some exhibit, he didn’t even realize his phone was ringing; Youngjae, probably the only one that still had patience to deal with this unexplainable sulkiness fit, called to tell him that he needed to move his ass, because apparently Jackson misunderstood the schedule and the last bus to Mokpo leaves in forty minutes.

When Jinyoung finally boarded the bus, out of breath from running all the way to the bus terminal, all of his friends were already there; he could tell that something was off – and he probably should’ve known, when Jaebum grabbed his sleeve and dragged him to sit together, his already usual bus partner Jackson sitting with Youngjae this time, leaving Mark to be the one to sit alone. It didn’t seem like Mark was against it though, it took less than an hour to get from Gwangju to Mokpo anyway, besides, he seemed to value some alone time, already with his earphones in and eyes closed for a short nap.

“We need to talk.” Jaebum whispered to him so that no one around them would hear when Jinyoung wordlessly stuffed his backpack under a seat in front of him and glued his stare somewhere at the ground, ready to ignore everyone and everything.

“About what?” He mumbled, not in the mood to talk about anything, especially if the topic was supposed to be exploring the reasons why he was like that.

And it was, as Jaebum sighed and started his monologue. “Who rained on your parade this time? I mean, okay, I know who, because leaving you alone with Mark for so long probably wasn’t a great idea, but how did that happen?”

“How are you so sure it’s because of him?” Jinyoung said, defensively crossing his arms on his chest, as if that would’ve blocked all the questions.

“I saw your face when you came back together, besides,” Jaebum made a pause, not sure if he should say it. “I talked to Mark a while back, he didn’t want to talk about it either. So, what happened?”

“Oh, of course you talked to him.” Jinyoung sarcastically replied, accompanying his words with cold laughter.

Jaebum frowned, because nothing that was happening made any sense. “What on earth is wrong with the fact that yeah, we’re not assholes to each other, unlike you are to him, and talk once in a while?” And then he made the worst and the most absurd conclusion ever. “Are you jealous because you think that I’m not going to be your best friend anymore now that I’m friends with Mark, or what?”

“I’m not a six year old.” Asides the incredulous stare Jinyoung was beginning to realize that it indeed was stupid, neither Jaebum nor anyone else in this group of people were guilty because of the mess with him and Mark, and he probably was making a fuss out of nothing.

“You sure about that?” Jaebum told, but sparkles of an upcoming laughter fit were already forming in his eyes, and they both knew he didn’t mean it. “So, what happened?”

“Nothing. It’s stupid.”

“Just spill the beans.”

And Jinyoung finally told, feeling how relieving it was to let it all out – how they met in a convenience store, about Mark’s declined card and how he paid for him, about how they actually talked with each other; about how Mark told that their previous friendship was over. “And then,” Jinyoung started to ramble and Jaebum had to gather all of his listening skills to understand what was spilling out of his best friend’s mouth. “He suddenly says that he wants to ask something, so I say yeah, go ahead, and then he fucking asks if _you_ are mad at him about something, because of what you said joking about moving out of the country.”

Jaebum for a while looked even puzzled than he was before. “So… Where’s the problem?”

“What do you mean ‘where’s the problem’?” Jinyoung had to control himself so he wouldn’t raise his voice, remembering that they still were in a bus. “After all these years, he doesn’t even ask if _I_ am mad about something!”

“You know where the problem is?” his best friend decided, already knowing that the conclusion won’t amuse Jinyoung in the slightest. “The problem isn’t the far-fetched assumptions about my unintentional assholeness he made. It’s just you, jealous that he’s not spending his entire time asking for forgiveness.”

“What the fuck are you on?” Jinyoung hissed, because this was just _absurd._ “I don’t care about apologies, he has nothing to apologize for. People drift apart, friendships break, that’s life, I’m peachy about that.”

“Sure.” Jaebum slowly said, almost mocking his answer. “That’s _exactly_ why you get your panties twisted whenever Mark shows a little more affection to anyone that isn’t you.”

Jinyoung wasn’t about to listen to his blasphemy any further, changing the topic. “What’s up with you and Jackson?”

Jaebum, spending a good half of his life with Jinyoung, was used to all these topic changes whenever it was comfortable for the latter, but even he had to take a few moments to process this one. “I don’t see how that’s relevant to the topic.”

“I told you about my stuff, you’re going to tell me about yours, that’s how.” Jinyoung kindly explained.

“I don’t know, he just started avoiding me out of the blue.” Jaebum shrugged, but it was clear that he was bothered by this. “At first I didn’t pay much attention when he didn’t reply after I came back to the hostel yesterday, like, we don’t need to greet each other every damn time we see each other in the place we’re staying or whatever, but then during lunch he obviously dragged Bambam to sit in between us, and now he’s doing the same in the bus, just with Youngjae. Maybe you know what’s up with that?”

Jinyoung had an idea, remembering yesterday’s conversation with his roommate, but he didn’t quite want to admit that due to his stupid outburst when Jackson was simply stating the obvious, he might’ve ruined Jaebum’s chances by bringing up the fact about two of them falling asleep in the same bed.

“I’ll try to talk to him.”

 

When they reached Mokpo, Youngjae’s hometown and the latter’s last stop since he wasn’t planning on going with them to Busan (if Jinyoung didn’t know it was because he wanted to spend a little bit more time with his family, he definitely would’ve thought that the actual reason was Youngjae being sick of all the poorly hidden drama that was happening around), it was already evening; luckily, his household wasn’t that far from the bus station.

Even though spacious, the house wasn’t huge, surely not suited to house this many people all at once, and they could only sigh in relief learning that Youngjae’s sister and brother weren’t home, so they had two spare beds.

“I’m sorry, but I never promised a five star hotel.” Youngjae told, but they all unanimously reassured him that it was fine.

And it really was – they had a free roof above their heads, homemade food mama Choi was more than happy to make for them; it was okay even despite the fact that four of them (Mark, Jackson, Jaebum and Bambam, because they lost a round of rock paper scissors) had to share the floor in the living room, drowning in all the pillows and mattresses Youngjae’s dad could find for them in the attic; Jinyoung won a bed in Youngjae’s sister’s room and Yugyeom had the brother’s bed, sharing the room with Youngjae.

The only one who seemed bothered was Jackson, having to sleep near Jaebum, but he tried not to show it.

It was fun to hang out like that, without any big plans or schedules – Mokpo wasn’t exactly the place for sightseeing, unless you count a natural history and maritime museums, but none of them fancied them much. It also was nice to talk with Youngjae’s parents at the dinner table; to go to sleep without setting their alarm clocks. They had two nights in Mokpo before going to Busan, and it felt relaxing to have nowhere to rush, no check-out deadlines, no bus schedules.

Jinyoung decided to ignore Jackson dragging his mattress and blankets across the entire living room, almost ready to sleep in the corridor, in order not to be nowhere near Jaebum. Things were definitely complicated there and Jinyoung thought it would be better to deal with them in the morning, even though his conscience was uneasy.

They were dead tired, travelling and lack of proper sleep was getting to all of them, so it wasn’t a surprise that they all fell asleep in an instant. It wasn’t a surprise anymore either, to wake up to someone screaming, so Jinyoung tried to ignore the yells and arguing, and someone’s laugh in the living room hours later. It was already morning and he had no idea for how long he slept; Youngjae’s parents were supposed to be out for the entire day, so maybe that was why they all were yelling so damn loud in that living room, so Jinyoung stumbled his way to the source of noise, frowning due to all the light of almost early afternoon.

The reason for the argument that was taking place was kind of sad and funny at the same time, and a little awkward, because Mark was apparently the main hero of it – his entire hair was covered in red blotches of something that reminded of dried hair dye.

“Why do you all have to be this loud, what’s going on?” The most important question was asked by Yugyeom who stumbled into the room almost at the same time as Jinyoung did, equally as sleepy.

“It was an accident and I already said I’m sorry.” Bambam was quick to defend himself, giving away that he was the one responsible for whatever mess that was happening.

As Jaebum explained, because Mark was too furious to speak, Bambam decided to get his revenge for the fake bug by dyeing Jackson’s hair with red dye which were supposed to wash off immediately, however, the plan typically failed – combine Bambam knowing shit about hair dye, his sometimes disappearing Korean reading skills and sleepiness, and you will get him picking bright red permanent hair dye and mixing up people in the darkness. And of course, Mark, looking like his head was bleeding from several wounds.

“What the fuck am I supposed to do now?” Mark said, running his fingers through his freshly blow dried hair that looked very… interesting with this weird mix of still blond and red patches.

“Bleach it back?” Yugyeom suggested, treading on eggshells, because it looked like Mark could explode any second, and that was scary, because Mark Tuan was always smiling and in a good mood; well, at least most of the time.

“I don’t recommend.” Jackson said, rubbing the nape of his neck, trying to come up with a solution. “One of my coursemates always told that red is a pain in the ass to bleach, he might turn orange or something.”

Jinyoung didn’t know whether he felt an urge to sigh or to laugh, because it started to become so typical for them, to get into shit like that. And a few moments later Mark was probably more surprised by the fact that Jinyoung was talking directly to him again, moreover, offering _help._ “We can dye it dark brown for now, and once we get back home you can find a hairdresser to fix this mess, since I don’t think we’ll find someone professional working here on Sunday.”

“So what are you saying exactly?” Jaebum asked, while Bambam was trying to apologize for the hundredth time.

“I’m saying that someone can go to the nearest decent drugstore, buy hair dye and I’ll dye his hair, since I don’t trust any of you to do that.”

“I… Don’t think it’s that great of an idea.” Jaebum bit his lip, war flashbacks returning to his head. “I still have scars on my scalp from the last time you dyed my hair when we were teens.”

Jinyoung shrugged, trying to ignore Mark’s terrified expression hearing all that. “This time it’s not bleach, and unless Mark has a better solution or is actually digging this look, that’s the only thing I can think of.”

Mark thought for a while, because he _definitely_ wasn’t a fan of looking like that, probably dreading the moment he agreed to meet all these people, especially Bambam, but then he just sighed. “I guess, it’s time to get back to brown hair. I trust Jinyoung not to burn my scalp off anyway.”

It felt weird, hearing that Mark trusted him, but he tried to ignore this feeling by taking Youngjae’s laptop to google what kind of hair dye would be the best for this situation, and eventually Jaebum and Youngjae were sent out to the store with clear instructions and screenshots in their phones; Bambam was following Mark everywhere apologizing every second, he was so afraid that Mark hated him now, the latter eventually found it amusing and kept telling that it was okay, it was fixable. Hopefully.

Jinyoung thought that if that happened to him, Bambam wouldn’t be walking on the surface of this earth anymore, but probably that was where Mark’s magic was – being chill and taking things lightly where it was due.

Half an hour later Jaebum and Youngjae came back, looking cheerful and laughing at some joke, which didn’t sit well with Jackson, reminding Jinyoung that he had one more task to do here, but it was postponed, since now he was stuck with Mark in a bathroom, because they didn’t want to ruin Youngjae’s house with even more hair dye.

The bathroom wasn’t the biggest one, it was cramped and it felt awkward, especially when the only convenient solution to get the job done was for Jinyoung to sit down on a toilet and Mark to sit on the floor in between the younger’s legs.

“Who would’ve thought,” Mark suddenly laughed, catching Jinyoung off guard and causing a bit of dye to fall on his jeans, probably ruining them. “That after all these years we would end up in a bathroom hundreds of kilometers away from Seoul with you dyeing my hair.”

“That truly brings me memories about dyeing Jaebum’s hair.” Surprisingly, Jinyoung laughed back, forgetting his entire _let’s-be-awkward-with-Mark_ demeanor. “He ended up with his hair falling out in pieces, because we left the bleach in for too long, I’m surprised he didn’t get bald.”

“Okay, that’s enough for me.” Mark pretended to be standing up and fleeing the bathroom in order to save those bits of not yet ruined hair he had. “Speaking about Jaebum, though…” Jinyoung’s heart started beating somewhat heavily at these words, but Mark proceeded anyway. “I think there was some sort of misunderstanding.”

“Misunderstanding?” Jinyoung repeated in attempt to sound casual, trying to get that one part of Mark’s hair where the dye didn’t want to stick at all. “What are you talking about?”

The older guy kept silent for a while, unsure how to proceed with all of this serious talk in situation and surroundings as ridiculous as these. “When I asked you if Jaebum is mad at me—“

“Forget it, it’s okay.” Jinyoung was quick to interrupt.

“No, listen, I just…” Mark wasn’t about to shut up so easily. “I just thought he’s mad because I hurt you, since you’re best friends and all.”

Suddenly Jinyoung felt like there wasn’t much air to breathe, and the atrocious smell of hair dye in a barely ventilated place had nothing to do with it. “He wasn’t mad, really, he just sometimes doesn’t think what he’s saying, and you— You didn’t hurt me, at all.”

That might’ve been a slight lie, and Mark was quick to spot it. “I basically ditched you after moving out, let’s be real, there’s no reason to hide it.”

However, Jinyoung thought that he’d rather die than face a conversation about what he felt then and what he was feeling right now, luckily, he was already done with the hair, so instead of responding, he dumped the bowl with leftovers into a sink, telling, “Instructions tell to keep this in your hair for half an hour and wash it out then.”

When they finally got out of the bathroom, trying to inhale every bit of fresh air, everyone was sitting in the living room quiet and proper like never, and it was obvious that they were trying to catch every word that was told in the bathroom, since the walls weren’t that thick and the bathroom was quite close; Jinyoung could only pray that they didn’t hear much.

Approximately an hour later, when Mark’s hair was washed and dry, they all had to give some credit to Jinyoung, because the overall sight wasn’t that bad, or at least it was better than before – the color was a little uneven, but Jinyoung wasn’t a professional, despite years of experience while helping his mom, and Mark’s hair was a whole mess to begin with, so this had to work for the upcoming week before coming back to Seoul.

Due to all the panic and fuss about the hair, they didn’t really have time nor wish to do something more, asides that hour or two in the backyard playing volleyball; the only person not playing was Jinyoung, because he opted for taking a blanket to lie on the grass with a book borrowed from the shelves of Youngjae’s dad. Jackson eventually joined him too, for some reason looking like he was determined to snap Jaebum’s neck only by the force of his stare, despite them being in the same team.

“If you have a problem with him, you should just talk it out.” Jinyoung noted, turning the page.

“Sure,” Jackson hissed, looking at Jaebum, who was now arguing with Yugyeom that the latter was breaking the rules. “Going to do that the same second when you talk with Mark. Oh, just look at him, pretending to know the rules and all.”

Jinyoung just shook his head, thinking that Jackson is weird when he’s in love, because he usually expresses his love while being angry at the person (later, looking back at it, Jinyoung will think that this could’ve been applied to some certain situations of other people as well, but that wasn’t important at the moment), but his eyes caught Mark, trying to solve the ongoing argument with a wide smile and a few jokes; and then Jinyoung caught himself trying to hide a small smile behind the book. That one felt weird too.

It also felt strange losing another round of rock paper scissors and ending up sleeping next to Mark in the living room during their last night in Mokpo, with Mark obviously not able to fall asleep, waking Jinyoung up every five minutes with his unbearable rolling around.

“I’m sorry.” Mark whispered an apology, so he that he wouldn’t wake up Yugyeom and Jackson who were sleeping right next to them. “I usually listen to music to help me fall asleep, but I lost my earphones somewhere in the house.”

Jinyoung at the time was ready to give up on sleep and was listening to music as well, so he didn’t say anything else, simply giving one earphone to the guy next to him, both of them lying on the floor looking at the ceiling and listening to the same song.

“We’re good?” Mark whispered again, as if wanting to be sure that the lightheartedness in their conversations that lasted all day wasn’t about to disappear again.

Jinyoung simply nodded, but for some reason, he still felt strange.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mess inside a mess inside a mess. even though youngjae is temporarily leaving the fic, no worries, you'll be hearing about him in THE pohang chapter where all kinds of mess will be happening, and that's gonna like, 2nd chapter after this one. 
> 
> but at the same time, idk when that's gonna be uploaded, i'm taking a break. some things were said, some things happened, sometimes some people just need rest with no writing at all.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello i am alive

This unexpected peaceful turn in Mark and Jinyoung’s relationship brought only good things so far, everyone would say.

Despite the quite poorly hidden surprise about Jinyoung behaving like a mature twenty-two year old with manners and even helping Mark, who offered to set the table for their last breakfast in Mokpo, all the guys appreciated seeing no unexplainable anger fits or awkward silence.

Scratch the last one, because the silence coming from Jackson and Jaebum definitely _was_ awkward, both of the guys trying to avoid any possible verbal and any other contact; Jackson was trying to burn a hole in a sandwich that Jaebum passed to Youngjae and it probably looked like suddenly everything was turned upside down – to be sulky out of nowhere was more a Jinyoung thing.

The latter, however, was quite cheerful, putting the last plates on the table and exchanging glances with Mark, who was also looking and Jaebum and Jackson, and had to turn around to contain his laughter when Mark made a face at him.

The said breakfast passed quickly and rather uneventfully; soon they had to get their backpacks again, ready to leave for Busan, one of the last stops of their trip. They exchanged hugs with Youngjae’s parents, politely refusing their offer to cancel their remaining plans and just stay here till holidays ended. Youngjae also said his goodbyes, mostly to Jinyoung, Mark, Jaebum and Jackson, since they were from different universities, and made all of them promise that they will soon meet in Seoul.

Jinyoung should’ve felt a disaster approaching when Jaebum for some reason stayed a little longer to talk with Youngjae about something, the latter looking kind of worried; but then he decided to ignore it, because Mark also saw what was happening and put his arm around Jackson’s shoulders, trying to occupy him with some random talk. Luckily, the trick seemed to work.

The five hour long trip from Mokpo to Busan wasn’t as unbearable as they thought, mostly because the majority of them fell asleep the same second they fastened their seatbelts and woke up just before entering the city. The only people not sleepy at all were Yugyeom, Jaebum and Jinyoung, the latter being tortured by his best friend sitting next to him and blasting a playlist of sad love songs so loud, it was clearly heard everywhere around even despite the earphones.

“Honestly, the only thing I’m not going to miss after we go home will be these stupid ass buses and terminals.” Bambam complained when they finally got off in the middle of nowhere, since the bus station was quite far from the city center, almost in outskirts. “So, how many years will it take for us to find the hostel?”

“It’s not that far.” Jinyoung yawned out, feeling dead sleepy. “We’ll just need to take the subway, transfer to the second line, then a few more stops and we should be in the right neighborhood.”

His speech was so unexpectedly confident and fast for someone who didn’t even have a map with himself at the moment, Jackson couldn’t help but frown. “Woah, okay. How do _you_ know the way so well?”

Everyone, including Jinyoung himself, tilted their heads in confusion when Jaebum and Mark responded instead of him, at the exact same time. “His grandparents used to live here.”

Jinyoung wasn’t that surprised about Jaebum knowing it; in the end, it was him who always used to get all sulky and petty about Jinyoung’s parents sometimes sending their son to Busan to spend a month or two there during summer holidays. Mark still remembering this, on the other hand, was somehow touching and nice, even though not exactly shocking either – they did visit Jinyoung’s grandparents together once, when he was eleven and Mark managed to convince his parents to let him go.

Even now, almost ten years later, Jinyoung wouldn’t even bat an eyelash before declaring that it was one of the best summers of his life, even if he did end up all stung by the bees in his grandparents’ garden because Mark accidentally hit a beehive with a baseball ball. The memories brought a short-lived smile on his lips, however, he wasn’t sure that Mark remembered all of that.

“Do they still live here?” Yugyeom asked, finally deciding to join the conversation instead of being stuck to his phone all the time.

“No, they moved to countryside when I was in high school. They kept saying Busan was too loud for them.” Jinyoung explained, guiding them through the bus terminal to the subway station, which was connected with the main building.

“There’s barely any people here though.” Jackson said and Jinyoung could agree with him to some extent.

Everything seems a little empty and too quiet when you come from an unending chaos that Seoul is; even places which would look huge for other people start to feel so, so small and secluded, but he tried not to think about it – young adult crisis and existential questions could’ve waited till they come back to a whole bunch of midterm preparations and homework.

Jinyoung’s “not that far” turned out to be a half an hour ride to another station where they were supposed to transfer, so instead of talking they all gladly caught some free wifi from the train, with an exception of Mark and Jackson, who were sitting farther from everyone else. Jinyoung wanted to go to them and lecture their asses about how they should stick together so that no one would get lost, but Mark, seeing him, gestured him not to.

It was slightly unsettling, because the gesture was only a mere glance, but they seemed to have found a way to communicate without words again, so he stood in his place, scrolling through his phone apps and listening how Bambam is trying to mimic the voice announcing the names of the stations.

The whole thing was even more tiring than before, because it seemed that a heatwave, so not typical for mid-spring, reached Busan as well; when they were finally (and unfortunately) out of the refreshing coolness of an underground subway station Yugyeom asked, “There’s a beach here, right?”

“Yeah.” Jinyoung responded, by now officially declared the Busan expert by his friends, trying to brush the sweat off his forehead, feeling how his backpack straps are cutting into his skin, making him want to throw a fit. “Not near here, but it’s not that terribly far. We can go there later.”

“I mean,” Jackson quickly caught what Yugyeom actually had in mind. “We’re going to be here only for one night, and it’s too hot to be suffering in some shady cheap ass room, so we can just… Sleep in the beach or something, it would be awesome.”

“And probably illegal.” Jaebum mumbled with some certain sarcasm in his voice, but Jinyoung silenced him by shoving an elbow into his side. They didn’t need more arguments and drama, but surprisingly, Jackson didn’t say anything back.

“The beach security isn’t the strictest one as far as I remember from when I was, like, fifteen and used to go there to get wasted with my friends.” Jinyoung said after a moment of thought. “So I guess, if you all really want, we could. But we will probably need to pay the cancellation fee for the hostel anyway, since we’re bailing out the last second.”

The rest of the guys didn’t contemplate for long, the idea of sleeping in a beach without even having any proper gear for that, asides a few blankets, sounded pretty attractive, especially with the exciting possibility of getting in trouble, so they all nodded.

“I can try to talk to the manager about that cancellation.” Mark said with a mischievous grin on his face and Jinyoung looked at him incredulously. Busan people were always known for their stubborn and heated personalities, so there little to none chance of them getting out of this clean, but Mark was just as stubborn and still left, joking about being too cute to resist.

Somewhere in the back of Jinyoung’s head, a tiny annoying voice whispered that Mark had a point there, but he decided that he was getting out of his mind because of the heat.

Ten minutes later, to all of their surprise, Mark returned with a wide smile and both thumbs up, and even with a detailed city map resting in the pocket of his shorts.

“What kind of miracle did you do there?” Jinyoung asked, when they were searching for the nearest convenience store to buy water and some ice cream before going to the beach.

“I have my ways.” Mark laughed. “I walked in when the manager was talking with her daughter over the phone, the girl apparently is an exchange student in the States, so we had some topics to discuss. By the way, I kind of pretended to be you, since the reservation was made with your name, so there’s that.”

Jinyoung only smiled at it, because the situation sounded too hilarious – Mark, pretending to be him and trying to swoon the manager into not charging Jinyoung’s card with the cancellation fee, sounded just as ridiculous as their past teen year adventures together did.

Bambam and Yugyeom were not so subtle wiggling their eyebrows seeing their friends hanging out around each other so casually, but Jinyoung pretended not to understand what it was all about.

As expected, the beach was crowded due to the hot weather despite it being Monday, but somehow they managed to snatch a decent spot at a place where sun wasn’t shining right into their heads. Jinyoung wasn’t exactly a fan of getting shirtless, but the heat was unbearable and his shirt was sticking to his skin in all the nasty ways, besides all the other guys got rid of theirs the same second they sat down on the sand, so he followed suit.

Later, a few local guys came up to them asking if they would like to join their team for a small basketball competition, and Yugyeom, together with Mark, immediately dropped whatever they were doing at the moment (building a sandcastle); Bambam, being a good friend he was, tagged along to cheer for them, dragging Jackson together.

Jinyoung watched them comfortably lying on his blanket, because the small self-made basketball arena wasn’t that far from them; for some reason he couldn’t contain his smile whenever Mark would score a few points, or his curses when the other team fouled against him. Jaebum kept scoffing at that, because Jinyoung was never into sports, so the latter, returning to the book he was reading all flushed from embarrassment, swung a handful of sand for his best friend to shut up.

Jaebum, cleaning the sand from his blanket, rolling his eyes at this elementary school-like behavior and then deciding to go for a short nap probably was a bad idea, since the four guys, proudly returning from the basketball competition with a bronze medal an hour later, had a plan to prank him.

Or to be more specific, not really to prank – rather just openly surround him (Jinyoung shamelessly joined, because he enjoyed Jaebum’s misery) and drag the poor guy, yelling and trying to get out, all the way to dunk him into the water.

“You’re dead.” Jaebum tried to say, when he finally emerged from the water, but his words were easily outvoiced by a teasing round of laughter. “I swear to god, you’re all dead.” Nobody expected him to do anything immediately, but Jaebum always stayed true to his words, and Bambam didn’t even manage to react in any way when Jaebum jumped on him in almost WWE style and dragged him under the water too.

Few moments later it was a whole water battle between all of them, laughing and screaming; Jinyoung was yelling because someone jumped on him from the back and was trying to make him fall back into the water again. Turned out, it was Mark, with a wide smile on his face, hands still on Jinyoung’s shoulders, and it made the younger feel a little weird.

It wasn’t a bad kind of weird, this one felt warm and somehow fuzzy, but Jinyoung didn’t know what it was exactly, nor wanted to find out now, the only thing occupying his mind being getting revenge for being drenched.

It took a few more minutes and a very annoyed lifeguard telling them that someone reported their playfulness as a mass attempt to drown people for them to finally get out of the water, still happy like little kids. It was lunch time already and they were hungry, so they were bound to leave the sea soon anyway.

Jinyoung kept not subtly watching how Jackson borrowed his towel for Jaebum to dry his hair, two of them now looking like the past two days of unbearable tension didn’t exist.

Time was passing incredibly fast for some reason, probably because they were truly having fun, and none of them even thought about regretting the decision to stay outside, especially when the heat started to die down, leaving them with a refreshing warm breeze. They packed their things when beach security started to walk around getting all the late swimmers out of the water for the night; the plan was to walk around a little to see other places and to find a pharmacy, because they needed something to treat Yugyeom’s sunburn, then go back.

“Any ideas for doing something interesting?” Jackson told, fighting mosquitos that were circling around when they finally returned to the beach after midnight to find a nice place. They were calm about it – they weren’t the only ones planning to stay for the night, there were a few people here and there, mostly couples though.

“None of us seem to be sleepy yet, so we can play something.” Jaebum answered, munching on a sandwich he bought on their way back. “Like truth or dare, or whatever.”

“You’re so suspiciously into this, I start to feel like you have some hidden intentions.” Jinyoung noted, putting his phone down after checking buses to Pohang for tomorrow. Responsibilities always came before fun for him. “But I don’t mind, just nothing wild for dares.”

All the remaining guys excitedly agreed, and they started off with a few harmless questions, which caused Yugyeom to get a breakdown when Bambam admitted that he was the one to break his phone screen a few months ago and put the blame to supposedly drunk Yugyeom, and not that bad of tasks for dares, resulting in Jackson having to place a peck on Yugyeom’s forehead, which made the atmosphere a little awkward, but they soon laughed it off; however, the more into the night, the braver the dares got and the more complicated the questions became.

“Have you ever thought about Jinyoung like… Not as a best friend, but something else?” That was the question Mark threw at Jaebum when the latter chose truth, and it caught Jinyoung off guard. Mark was smiling as brightly as ever, and it was impossible to see whether he had any other underlying thoughts about the question.

“Something else? Like, as an asshole who sometimes deserves to be dead in the ditch? Yeah, plenty of times.” Jaebum laughed in response, but it was obvious that Mark didn’t mean it like that, so he soon got silent and thinking. The silence was more for the show and creating a dramatic mood, since everyone was anticipating a juicy answer, but in the end it was short and clear. “Ew, no.”

Jinyoung felt relieved for some reason, Mark seemed to be satisfied with the answer as well, a light relaxed smile appearing on his lips and disappearing just as quickly, because Jaebum threw the question, slightly modified, back, not even bothering to acknowledge that it wasn’t even Mark’s turn.

“Do you like someone at the moment?”

The atmosphere was awkward again and deep inside Jinyoung even thought that he didn’t even want to know the answer, and was quite sure that Mark will tell Jaebum to fuck off, because he was always private about his feelings. But Mark soon hid his surprise, shrugging and telling a vague, “Maybe.”

“Maybe?” Yugyeom repeated. “Either you like someone or not, there’s no maybe in my book at least.”

“It’s complicated.”

For whatever reason Jinyoung’s mood immediately dropped after hearing this, most probably he was tired already, and a few rounds later he decided to withdraw from the game altogether. It was past 3 AM already and they all were getting sleepy, so no one questioned it, the game stopping soon after.

They tried to get as comfortable as possible, coming to terms with the fact that they will wake up with sand literally everywhere in their stuff; but it was a nice adventure, so after wishing each other goodnight and mosquitos to die in pain, they all snuggled into their blankets seemingly satisfied, with a light refreshing breeze caressing their skin.

However, Jinyoung couldn’t fall asleep no matter how much he rolled around.

At some point, maybe around five o’clock, he finally gave up and stood up to take a walk along the beach. Dawn was slowly passing, leaving the place for a sunrise, a few rays of sun peeking out the clouds, tinting everything with warm undertones.

Jinyoung didn’t know why it was so hard for him to fall asleep, especially when he hadn’t slept properly for a few days. Actually, he had a vague idea why, but wasn’t about to admit it, aimlessly walking back and forth to tire himself out, but it just wasn’t happening.

His heart fell somewhere to his knees when he felt someone next to him, but after learning who it was, he managed to get himself together. “I thought you’re sleeping, Mark.”

Mark shook his head as a small sleepy smile curved his lips upwards. “I tried to, but then I felt someone walking around and thought it’s the beach security or something. Turns out, it’s just you.”

“Sorry.” Jinyoung told, looking somewhere under his feet instead of the guy next to him. “I couldn’t fall asleep.”

“That’s okay. Besides, us getting out of there had some nice effects, apparently.”

Jinyoung looked back to see what Mark was talking about and noticed that now sleeping arrangements were suddenly changed into Jackson and Jaebum sleeping back to back, even if he was sure that there were at least two more people between them earlier, and Jinyoung let out a smile.

“Well that was quick and painless.” He noted. “By the way, what did you talk about with him in the subway earlier? When you got separated from the rest of us.”

Mark shrugged. “About things. Opportunities, dumb arguments. The birds and the bees.” He started chuckling and Jinyoung didn’t even realize how he lightly hit the older guy’s shoulder for messing around. “Anyway, I see he made some right conclusions, and that’s a thing to celebrate.”

“Thanks for sparing me a headache. Though I guess it was all my fault to begin with, I blurted out some things.”

For a while they were walking in complete silence, just listening to a few lazy waves crashing, until Mark asked, “Is this the same beach your grandmother took us that one time when I was here too?”

Jinyoung got surprised, he didn’t expect Mark to remember it, because he himself barely remembered this particular outing, the most vivid bits and fragments of that day being both of them going to buy ice cream to a convenience store near the beach. There was one bugging bit as well, in which Jinyoung was sure that they were holding hands back then, but he didn’t know for sure and didn’t want to ask Mark about it.

So he settled only for a short, “Yeah, the same one.”

“It was fun back then. It’s fun now too.”

Suddenly, maybe caught up in some weird loop of nearly 6 AM honesty and simplicity, Jinyoung’s mind changed the course of memories and decided to return to the current times. “Why is it complicated?”

Mark clearly wasn’t awake enough to understand this shift of topics. “What is?”

“Your crush, or whatever.”

Jinyoung was trying to sound nonchalant, but was clearly failing. He expected Mark to make fun of him or something, because it was none of his business, however, Mark’s smile seemed a little fake, when he repeated, “It’s just… complicated.”

“Do I know that person?” It was a little too straightforward and off-limits, but Mark didn’t mind – they were best friends for years anyway, they used to know everything about each other and maybe it was about time to get back to that place, at least a little bit, in some way.

“I don’t think so.” Mark told. “Sometimes it feels like he doesn’t even know himself.”

Jinyoung thought he could relate to that person, but didn’t say anything, feeling this certain foreign uneasiness and deciding that it was only his sleepiness finally acting up. He suggested Mark to go and try to sleep; Mark said he wanted to look at the sea for a bit, but Jinyoung dragged him away telling that it could wait, Pohang has a seaside too and he will be able to look at it for however long he wanted as soon as they get enough of sleep.

Pohang had a seaside, but it had a whole mess happening there as well, but they weren’t about to find it out until the upcoming night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> finally we're getting to the almost-peak of the story and THE mess, honestly i can't wait lmao  
> but yay @ all the ships finally getting to their senses, even if it's for one short moment. hopefully you liked this, and as always comments are very welcomed


	8. Chapter 8

“It has to be some sort of a mistake.” Jinyoung said petrified, his words almost coming off as begging. Flashbacks of messed up reservations were popping up in his mind, slowly making him realize that if there indeed was a mistake, he can be one hundred percent sure he made it _himself_.

“That’s exactly what I’m saying, young man.” The manager of the hotel replied to him, frowning and looking at the screen of his computer in the reception again. The fact that he looked like he didn’t really know how to use the device, which was kind of understandable considering how old he was, didn’t help at all – Jinyoung only felt even more anxious, almost to the point he was about to ask if he could look at the reservation himself. “There was a mistake, but it seems to be coming from your side, not ours.”

“Can we… Settle this somehow?” Jinyoung leaned in a bit, making his voice more silent so that his friends, who were dozing off on the sofa thanks to this unexplained strange tiredness from sleeping on sand (and the fact that Pohang bus terminal was like five kilometers away from the hotel and they went by feet), wouldn’t hear about the possible disaster. “We could pay extra money or something.”

 _He_ could’ve paid extra money, at that point, he didn’t even care anymore - his monthly stipend from the university was supposed to be transferred to his bank account soon anyway, so money wasn’t the biggest issue. He was eager to survive off instant ramen for the rest of the month to prevent a tragedy.

The manager looked at the computer screen again and apologetically shook his head. “I’m sorry, there’s nothing I can do. It’s quite busy for us right now, the entire first floor is booked for a family celebration and we can offer only exactly what you reserved, even if it was a mistake.”

“Why is it taking so long?” Yugyeom yawned, trying to stretch out his stiff and pained back, when Jinyoung finally returned to them, after telling the old man he wanted to discuss it with his friends. “Is there something wrong?”

“Well, not exactly _wrong_ , but…” Jinyoung trailed off, trying to postpone the announcement. In his honest opinion, it would’ve been better if the hotel just said that it was impossible to get a room at all due to the mistake; sleeping on some bench in a park or in a beach again seemed like so much better idea. Jaebum smacked his shoulder for stalling, so Jinyoung just sighed, preparing for all the possible reactions. “It seems like I somehow messed up the reservation, because the system was crashing every few minutes when we were picking places to stay, and they mixed up things. Instead of dorm room, we have one room with two beds and… two rooms with double beds. Meaning that four of us will have to share beds.”

All of this litany received only a silence, because no matter how comfortable around each other they had become over these days, the only people who wouldn’t have felt awkward about that were Yugyeom and Bambam, as they were like long separated twins anyway, and maybe Jinyoung with Jaebum. And this option would’ve been bearable, if not for the latter frowning and saying, “I’m definitely not sleeping with someone like Jinyoung in one bed, the last time it happened when we were seventeen, I was walking with bruises on my legs for months.”

“Is hyung that wild?” Bambam wiggled his eyebrows, but it earned only a lighthearted smack on his head from Mark. “Ouch, it was just a _joke_ , relax.”

Jackson scratched his head as if it would’ve helped him to come up with a solution, swearing that he saw some sand still coming off. “So what are we going to do? The place is nice though, and the sea is like only a few steps away, besides, we can’t be sure if we’re going to find rooms somewhere else.”

Mark finally decided to offer his insight about this whole mess. “It’s only for two nights, and I don’t think we’re going to spend much time in our rooms, literally no one will care where to sleep since we’re all tired as hell. So I suggest to just take what we have and then rock paper scissor through it to decide who’s rooming up with who. It sounds the most fair to me.”

Everyone nodded their heads without much thought, because the location _was_ incredible for the price paid, and no one had to offer anything smarter at the moment either. Jackson clutched his heart, telling, “Truly the oldest hyung, sorting everything out for us.”

It was a joke, a typical case of Jackson making fun of everything moving to brighten up the situation, however, it seemed like for some reason it hurt one particular person’s pride, and surprisingly, it wasn’t Jinyoung.

“I’m the same age as him though, he’s not _the_ oldest.” Jaebum mumbled scandalized, while Bambam and Yugyeom were exchanging eye rolls at this pettiness and bantering.

“Shut up, we both were born in the same year, which literally does make Mark the oldest if we count it _normally_ , not by this absurd system.” Jackson fired back, which caused Jaebum to get even sulkier, but he quickly let it go, only flashing a smile, because he didn’t want to get into an argument again. “So I guess we’re staying.”

Ten minutes later, when they were standing in a corridor of the second floor of the hotel with Jinyoung clutching a bunch of keys from the rooms, he probably should have known that luck wasn’t on his side throughout this entire trip. And now that he’s looking back at it, it wasn’t on his side probably ever since Mark barged back into his life.

After a few arguments about cheating in rock paper scissors and Jackson almost breaking Yugyeom’s fingers trying to catch the youngest quickly changing the signs, it was decided that one of the rooms with a double bed will be occupied by Jackson and Jaebum, who were not unhappy about that at all (Mark mumbled that they looked like they were even hoping to get one, but no one heard), Yugyeom and Bambam got the “regular” room with two beds.

“So that makes…” Mark trailed off, waiting for Jinyoung to show any kind of reaction, while they all were still standing with their hands frozen in game gestures.

 _Yeah_ , Jinyoung thought, but couldn’t open his mouth. That pretty much made him Mark’s bedmate for the upcoming two nights. And that concept was making him want to set himself on fire, because the last thing he ever wanted was to share a bed with Mark, no matter how much their relationship had improved over the time. He even hoped that someone will step in and say they were going to exchange places with him; but Jinyoung knew that nothing would’ve forced the two couples to separate.

Things were about to get very messy, they all had a feeling, watching how Mark and Jinyoung took their key and entered the room to put their stuff somewhere and look around in an unpleasant silence.

The bed of their room was huge though, so at least there was no reason to be _that_ close to each other during the night; the view was really nice since the windows were directed right to the beach and Mark even found a few packs of instant coffee and ramen in the shelves for them to use. And a coupon with more than fifty percent discount for drinks in the a club that was somehow connected with the hotel's main building or something, what seemed like a really good idea for Jinyoung – to drink the night away before having to sleep together with Mark sounded great. Nothing could've gone wrong with a plan like this, he thought, right?

Wrong, definitely wrong.

 

Jackson, hearing the offer to spend the night clubbing, was shocked, because it was coming from _Park Jinyoung_ , the person who was planning what museums they were going to visit when they were still in the bus, but none of the friends were against it.

The club wasn’t a huge one, it felt a little cramped for a place like this, with loud music blaring out of every speaker, but that didn’t stop Yugyeom from disappearing somewhere in the dancefloor and dragging Bambam along to be his wingman, because he found a very pretty girl and didn’t want to deal with her friend; Jackson and Jaebum were _somewhere_ , out of the sight after a drink or two. Jinyoung thought he saw them exiting the place, but then again, feeling another shot burning his throat, he decided he shouldn’t trust himself this blindly – he was _very_ tipsy even before midnight, which was a new low for him.

“How come a guy this cute sits here all alone?” Jinyoung didn’t even manage to notice how some girl took a seat at the bar next to him. Indeed, he was all alone, ditching his friends after a few mandatory group drinks, because he wanted to be alone for a while, mentally preparing for two long nights, as dramatic as it sounded. “You seem like you need company tonight.”

“Certainly not yours.” Mark appeared out of thin air, sitting down next to Jinyoung from the opposite side, putting his arm on the younger’s shoulder. He definitely was slightly tipsy as well, but not as drunk as his friend who dedicated his entire evening for trying out various drinks with that discount coupon. “So I suggest you get going.”

Jinyoung had a hard time understanding this entire exchange, since Mark was clearly pissed off and usually never talked like that with strangers. However, the girl seemed even angrier, abruptly standing up and mumbling something. It probably was quite offensive, because Mark looked like he was about to go after her, but Jinyoung stopped him, ordering yet another drink and asking, “What was that all about?”

“Don’t keep your things in pockets so obviously, she’s most probably a pickpocket. Didn’t take her eyes off your wallet.” Mark defensively explained, turning to a bartender. Jinyoung felt kind of weird, because that also meant that Mark was _keeping an eye on him_ , what was pleasant, but still, strange. “He had enough drinks, don’t make him another one, thank you.” The bartender, in the middle of making some sort of a cocktail, wasn’t really satisfied with that, neither was Jinyoung, determined to get hammered and nearing his goal.

“I want to dance.” He suddenly announced, a bit too loudly, but the music drowned everything anyway. His mouth felt barely able to make coherent sounds, and that was the first serious sign that everything should’ve ended right there – Park Jinyoung never dances. _Never._

Unless he’s nearing an alcohol poisoning, what was exactly the case.

“I honestly think it’s better for you to go to sl—“ Mark tried to say, but Jinyoung quickly made him shut up, putting a finger against his lips, what was the most intimate case of physical contact between them in ages. It was enough to catch Mark off guard, though he got even more shocked when Jinyoung stood up, grabbed his hand and dragged him to the dancefloor, pretty gracefully considering his state.

Bambam, all sweaty and flushed red from all the heat, reaching the bar the exact time those two left, just gave them a humorous glare, shouting his congratulations.

Of course, by the time Mark and Jinyoung reached the dancefloor, some slow song started playing, getting most of the people out of there and leaving mostly couples. Jinyoung didn’t seem like he cared, focused on having the time of his life.

Another problem of him being drunk was that he was extremely touchy, clingy and needy – and this time it translated into Jinyoung wrapping his arms around Mark and forcing him to sway to sides in a tune of some sappy love ballad. He didn’t feel that his friend became extremely stiff thanks to this, as if he was nervous for some reason, but Mark knew that arguing with Jinyoung was about the same as arguing with a wall or a chair when he was _sober_ , so it probably would’ve been even worse when he was shitfaced drunk, so he didn’t put much fight, suffering it through.

It took approximately three ballads for Jinyoung to get bored, but he didn’t notice that with every step they took Mark was guiding him out of the club, slowly, so that the younger wouldn’t notice what was happening and wouldn’t throw a fit. A few moments later, he was regretting not taking the elevator, because Jinyoung started to fidget and whine about how hungry he was and how sick he was feeling.

“I guess you would let me go back to the club if I was your mysterious crush.” Jinyoung drunkenly mumbled, when Mark barely managed to turn around in time, because while he was searching for the key of their room, Jinyoung was about to run somewhere again. “I mean, everything for the crush, right?”

“We’re not discussing it when you’re about to pass out.” Mark sounded somehow strict and not amused by the topic turning to this, firmly holding Jinyoung’s wrist to secure that he wouldn’t go anywhere this time.

“Why not.” Jinyoung told, stumbling a little, causing both of them half-fall into the room. Mark tried to be angry or to want to slap some sense into his friend, but in the end, Jinyoung did look like a very adorable mess, hair sticking into various directions and the guy trying his best to focus on raiding the shelves for that instant ramen they had. “Wouldn’t he get jealous if he knew you’re sharing a bed with me?”

Mark only laughed, seeing how Jinyoung was stumbling to sit on the bed with his food after a few minutes, accidentally making his noodles with cold water instead of hot. But probably it was better that way, since boiling water and drunk people wasn’t a good match to begin with. “I don’t think he would really care about it right now. Since he has no idea I have a crush on him.”

“That’s sad.” Jinyoung said, stuffing his mouth with food, not even noticing that something was off with it. His mood took a shift as well, to a whole another end of the emotion spectrum in a blink of an eye; now he felt downright terrible for Mark because _the guy had a one sided crush on some stranger whom Jinyoung didn’t even know for god’s sake_ , and it honestly looked like he was about to cry. “Why don’t you tell him?”

“It’s not the best timing right now. He’s a bit… confused. But that’s okay.” Mark smiled, sitting down on the bed too, but his eyes were kind of sad; Jinyoung obviously had no idea what on earth he was doing with remarks and questions like these.

“I’m sorry.” Jinyoung told, but it didn’t feel related to the topic. And it wasn’t, it was only a drunken honesty, taking the better of him. “I’m sorry for being such a pain in the ass all the time. You don’t have to put up with my whiny and petty self all the time, but you still do.”

Mark appreciated the apology, but he was too tired and it wasn’t the right occasion to talk about things like that, even though his heart kind of hurt, as he admitted to himself for probably the first time. “Shit happens, don’t sweat about it. Now be a good boy, finish up your food and let’s go to sleep. I’m dead sleepy and you need to sober up too.”

Jinyoung wasn’t into sleeping yet, it seemed, because he turned to Mark with a mischievous smile. “If your crush doesn’t know you like him, it might be a good idea to get him feel something by making him jealous. Jaebum always says so.” He started, but quickly stopped again, in deep thought. “But he’s dated like one girl for four hours in middle school and some idol through a dating simulator game, so I don’t know how true that actually is.”

“It probably isn’t. Unless you’re in middle school, or living in a drama.” Mark noted. “And besides, how would you even make him jealous?”

Jinyoung seemed to be thinking about it really hard, at least trying, because ramen he just ate didn’t help to sober up his mind at all, making him feel like everything was floating around due to all the alcohol. However, a few moments later he seemed like he came up with the solution.

If he was a little more sober, at least a _bit_ , he would’ve never done that, even if someone offered all the world’s money for it; but that moment, he just _really_ wanted to help Mark with his mysterious crush that wasn’t even in the room (according to him). And even though the aftermath of his idea was threatening to be very uncomfortable at the best case scenario, he still leaned in and placed a light kiss on Mark’s lips.

It was barely a kiss, their lips hardly brushed against each other, because Jinyoung’s mind decided to finally shut down and make him fall asleep, hitting his head into Mark’s shoulder. The latter sat there for a few moments completely stunned, because he certainly wasn’t expecting _that_ out of all things, but… it did feel nice.

Weird but nice, however, he wasn’t sure if Jinyoung will remember it the next morning, or whether did it even mean anything. So Mark decided to postpone overthinking for other times and carried his friend to bed properly, putting a blanket over him. Jinyoung only sighed and mumbled something as Mark was trying to carefully get into the bed himself, ready for a sleepless night.

It wasn’t exactly sleepless though, at some point, just before the dawn, Mark finally passed out while reading his pathology notes he took with himself in case he needed a distraction and because he had a test from it right after they were supposed to come back to Seoul. However, the sleep didn’t last long – they were woken up by some ordeal in the corridor; someone was yelling and slamming doors, and then shouting even more. Jinyoung, still a little drunk, could’ve sworn he heard something breaking, probably glass.

“What the actual fuck.” Mark groaned, stuffing his face into his pillow and Jinyoung turned to him surprised, as if forgotten he was sharing the bed with someone.

Mark was sleeping almost glued to the wall, leaving enough space for him, and Jinyoung was thankful for that, feeling his head already pounding in a terrible hangover headache. It seemed like Jinyoung didn’t remember a few details of the last night, finding some holes in his memory in between drinking a ridiculous amount of alcohol, dancing with someone and then returning to the room somehow, but those details could’ve waited, because someone screamed again, yelling something similar to, “You fucking asshole!”

“I’ll go see what’s happening there.” Mark mumbled, getting up and dragging himself to the door. Jinyoung could’ve already told that some major shit just went down from the way the older guy cursed, “Oh shit.”

“Get the fuck out of here!” Only then Jinyoung, jumping from his bed, finally realized that the voice belonged to Jackson.

What Mark and Jinyoung, and half of the other residents of the floor sans Bambam and Yugyeom, witnessed, reminded of a tacky sitcom – Jackson apparently was busy throwing Jaebum’s stuff out of the room, the latter yelling some incoherent curses back and trying to explain something.

“What on earth are you two doing here?” Mark asked, coming nearer and almost getting hit by something Jackson threw again, and they all hoped it didn’t belong to the hotel. Jinyoung took his place as a human shield for Jaebum, because Jackson looked so furious, nobody would’ve been surprised if a physical fight occurred.

“Ask this piece of shit was is he doing, or better yet _who_.” Jackson said, trying to get out of Mark’s grip and kicking air, what resulted only in him hitting his foot in the corner of a wall and screeching from pain.

“What the hell does that even mean?” Jinyoung asked, having a very bad feeling in his guts, the one that had nothing to do with nausea from his hangover.

“While in Mokpo, this bitch ass hooked up with Youngjae, that’s what!” Jackson yelled almost right into his face.

And then Jinyoung decided that god really hated him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we have a kiss (almost) and youngjae making a comeback in a way not too graceful, i'd say we're progressing lmao someone save those poor ppl  
> anyway, hope you liked this mess, excuse all the possible typos, and comments are always welcomed!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm here a whole day earlier, wow

It seemed like they were totally used to these kind of situations, wordlessly taking the cue to fix all the problems in that corridor in the quietest way possible, even though it was quite late for doing any kind of damage control; Bambam and Yugyeom, who got back a few seconds later and had absolutely no idea what happened (though probably the never ending curses of Jackson’s and half of Jaebum’s things scattered in the corridor were quite self-explanatory) were shooing people back to their rooms, telling that there was nothing to stare at; it took of a short glance for Mark and Jinyoung to decide on how to share the responsibilities too – Mark dragged Jackson back to his room, Jinyoung helped Jaebum to finish gathering his things and brought him to their room.

Maybe it was the wisest arrangement for this situation, since there still was some sort of tension between Mark and Jaebum after that stupid round of truth or dare back in Busan; the last thing they all needed was another fight.

Jinyoung had enough decency not to attack his best friend with questions immediately – he allowed the guy to settle down a little, which meant Jaebum throwing his belongings anywhere and falling into the bed, face first into a pillow and mumbling something similar to _“I’m an idiot”_. Jinyoung was about to note that he might have had a point, but didn’t say a word - it didn’t seem like a situation to joke around, so he kept his mouth shut, getting into the bed himself to have a long serious talk.

For a while, it might have seemed like a sleepover of two best friends, just that this time it wasn’t fun at all, due to all the drama that was happening around - at this point, they could’ve been completely sure that Yugyeom and Bambam hated them all for constantly ruining the vacation.

“What happened?” Jinyoung asked, checking if his best friend wasn’t shamelessly sleeping, because he didn’t move at all, just kept lying there with his face buried into the pillow.

But Jaebum wasn’t asleep, after a few seconds he turned on his back to face the ceiling, telling, “I’m a dumbass.”

“That we will confirm or deny when I know the details.” Jinyoung sounded even soft, trying to understand the exact amount of mess they were about to start solving here. “So?”

He definitely didn‘t expect Jaebum to admit everything so bluntly - of course, his best friend wasn’t a person to blatantly lie right into his face, but Jaebum, especially when feeling wronged, would usually put up some fight, trying to prove it wasn’t his fault only, that everything was a misunderstanding. However, now he just sighed. “Pretty much everything Jackson was yelling for the entire corridor to hear was true.”

“You really... hooked up with Youngjae?“ Jinyoung repeated unbelievingly. All this time he gave Jaebum the benefit of doubt, because during this entire trip they never seemed to be interested in each other, spending more time separately than interacting, one moping around because Jackson wasn‘t talking to him, another one just obliviously enjoying the holiday. “When did that happen?”

“During the last night in Mokpo.” Jaebum told and Jinyoung closed his eyes trying to remember that night, but it took some atrocious effort – with everything that was constantly happening around, hangover weren’t helping either. “We were sleeping in one room.” Jinyoung now remembered, Jaebum indeed won yet another round of rock paper scissors that night, but even then it didn’t seem like he or Youngjae would be extremely happy about that or something. Or maybe nobody noticed. “We couldn’t fall asleep, so we ended up playing some card game on the floor. Jackson wasn’t talking to me at that time and I was really frustrated about it, and Youngjae was just there and I… went for it.”

Jinyoung was never the first one to judge (well, in most of the cases, at least), but even he couldn’t help but shoot a disbelieving stare. “For god’s sake Im Jaebum, are you completely out of your mind? Who sleeps with other people _because they were ‘just there’_? Especially, when Youngjae is Jackson’s friend on top of that?”

Jaebum sat up looking defensive for the first time and a little scandalized as much as his sleepy and tipsy mind allowed him to, because neither one of the entire bunch of friends were completely sober that night. He looked at Jinyoung frustrated and annoyed, as if accusing his friend of completely missing the point. “We didn’t sleep together, Christ. Thanks for the trust though.”

Jinyoung wasn’t convinced, only skeptically raising his eyebrow. “They why did Jackson—“

“He got batshit crazy after hearing half of the story and blew everything out of proportion, though I don’t blame him. We kissed a few times, nothing happened after that, we just went to sleep.” Jaebum buried his head in his palms. “It wasn’t supposed to mean anything, ever. But Jackson didn’t even allow me to explain all this.”

Jinyoung finally remembered something more, something that was supposed to be the biggest hint that some things happened that night, but they all were too busy with moving and their own tproblems to notice. “The next morning, when we were getting ready to go to the bus station to depart to Busan, you were talking with Youngjae so long, we almost got late. He looked kind of worried, so it probably was about that, wasn’t it?”

“Yes. We talked and decided to forget everything that happened and just remain friends. Shit happens, he told me not to overthink it.”

“Yeah,” Jinyoung snorted, because he couldn’t understand what kind of logic was that. “Shit happens, friends truly do make out on a daily basis. Anyway, if this was supposed to be a secret, how did Jackson know? Did Youngjae snitch on you or something, because if he did, I swear to God—“

Jaebum interrupted, shaking his head and letting out a small chuckle, but the sound of it was sad. “No, I trust him. I told Jackson myself, when we returned to our room before this whole mess woke up like half of the hotel.”

Jinyoung wailed, not able to understand what was more stupid in this situation – Jaebum making out with Youngjae or him willing bringing this storm onto himself with a confession. “ _You idiot._ Why did you have to open your mouth, are you insane? If you fucked up like this, you should’ve kept your mouth shut for the upcoming eternity, nobody tells these things to a person they love, _oh my god_.”

Jaebum, however, didn’t look like he was regretting this decision and that somehow looked very genuine and kind of naïve. Sure, it didn’t cancel what he did, but the wish to stay as honest as possible even if he wasn’t cornered to admit the truth after a major screw up, was admirable, adorable even.

Jackson clearly thought otherwise though, as Jaebum explained, “We returned to the room quite late and things kind of got… there.” Jinyoung couldn’t help but crack up – a whole twenty-two year old grown ass man was brave enough to get himself into this kind of mess, but still couldn’t openly admit to his best friend that he and Jackson were about to have sex. “And then I… just _had_ to tell him, you know? I didn’t want to get Jackson into a situation as vague as that, so I told him there’s something he doesn’t know. At first he joked that if I’m about to tell him that I’m a virgin, he doesn’t care, but then I told him the truth, and… yeah. You probably heard all the rest.” Jaebum finished with another sigh and Jinyoung honestly felt sorry for him.

“This all is just terribly stupid.” Jinyoung finally said, resting his head on a bed frame, feeling how his headache was gradually getting worse and worse. “I mean, I understand where Jackson is coming from – what would happen if everyone started hooking up with the nearest person just because our crush isn’t talking with us for a moment? I don’t know how many hookups I’d have by now for all the times I and Mark didn’t speak with each other.” He finished unexpectedly, not really thinking about what he was saying and Jaebum, using every opportunity to shift the topic, turned his head to his best friend with a weird smile.

“Woah, did you just imply that you have a crush on Mark?” He whistled, Jinyoung smacked his forehead in denial.

“It was just an example and don’t think I’m done roasting your stupid ass.” Jinyoung replied, trying to understand what kind of shit was running through his own mind so that he used Mark as an example in a context like that. “One thing’s for sure though, you screwed up big time, Jackson can forgive basically everything, but not a betrayal. Good news – he doesn’t know it was only a kiss, so we can try to save the situation later.” Jinyoung’s words sounded almost matter-of-factly, stating everything in a calculated and summarizing manner, much like he would be presenting news. “I don’t know what’s happening there right now or how Mark is trying to deal with Jackson’s wrath, but I suggest waiting. And sleep a bit, we all need to be as fresh as possible to deal with this.”

Jaebum weakly smiled, as a sign of gratefulness for Jinyoung always being there to listen to everything stupid he had done and cover his burning ass. The latter only told him to stop being all mushy and sentimental and to go to sleep, but still gave him an extra blanket with a soft smile in return. A few minutes and Jaebum gave in to his tiredness, already asleep, quietly snoring; Jinyoung was about to close his eyes too, but then he heard someone silently knocking.

It was Mark, looking just as drained as Jinyoung was, and when the younger asked how did everything go, he told, “Jackson took his things and left, he’s going back to Seoul alone. I couldn’t convince him to stay, but I don’t think it’s a bad idea to keep them both away from each other for a while.”

Jinyoung wasn’t really surprised about that, when Jackson would get sulky about something, he always was stubborn like that, now the situation was a hundred times worse. And while he didn’t really fancy the idea of having Jackson wandering around the country alone in a state like this, he couldn’t do anything. “Yeah, I guess so. How is he, though?”

“Angry, sad. Heartbroken probably. I didn’t expect anything else.” Even though Mark was speaking silently, Jinyoung still stepped out of the room and closed the doors behind himself so Jaebum wouldn’t wake up and hear all this. “Seems like he really likes Jaebum, so… yeah. It’s just really shitty, to have your crush hooking up with someone else. Your friend, on top of that.”

“It wasn’t exactly a hookup, thank god.” Jinyoung told and shortly explained everything Jaebum told him earlier. “And, now that I think about it, Jackson wasn’t talking with him because _I_ pointed out it was a little strange for them to sleep in one bed if they’re only friends when we were in Jeonju, so it kind of means that I’m also responsible for this mess.”

Mark only laughed at this conclusion, shaking his head. “It doesn’t mean that. You didn’t sit there and smash their heads together to kiss. They’re all adults, Jinyoung, no one has any control over them. But if they only kissed a few times, maybe we can save this somehow. It would be a pity to let them give up, but we need some time.”

“Exactly my words.” Jinyoung yawned, feeling how the sleepiness was kicking in into every cell of his body. “What are your plans for today?”

“Before all this mess all I wanted was some sleep, but I don’t think I’ll be able to fall asleep now.” Mark shrugged. “So I actually planned to get some coffee and maybe continue revising for my pathology test next week. Do you want to tag along or are you going to catch on sleep?”

Actually, all Jinyoung wanted was to pass out for a few hours, or better yet, for the entire day if possible, since they had another night to spend in Pohang, but he didn’t even bat an eyelash before agreeing to go, asking Mark to give him some time to take a shower. The older guy nodded, telling that they were meeting in the lobby thirty minutes later and asking Jinyoung to search for study notes he left somewhere in the room.

They ended up buying instant coffee from a convenience store on their way to the seaside, which was only a few steps away from the hotel. Pohang’s beach was pretty bland compared to Busan’s, it was significantly smaller and little dirtier, but they didn’t complain – it was cloudy that morning and it looked like it was about to rain soon, quite an accurate depiction of the mood of this entire trip, so there weren’t a lot of people around, what always was a welcoming thing.

Mark wasn’t exactly a talker in general, but it was even worse when he studied, so minutes were passing like that, just with them both sitting on the sand with the older guy reading his notes and mumbling something from time to time, trying to memorize all those weird diagrams and diseases while Jinyoung was enjoying his coffee, looking at those few waves in the sea.

“How’s your hangover?” Mark asked, finally putting his notes down after some time, when it felt like he was about to throw up if he read one more sentence.

“Terrible. It’s the last time I drink this much.” Jinyoung swore, still feeling the nausea messing with his stomach from time to time, but caffeine definitely made it more bearable, at least the headache was sort of tolerable now. “I barely remember anything that happened last night, and I don’t really like this feeling. Who knows, maybe I also hooked up with someone.” The joke was in a poor taste, at least judging from Mark’s hardened facial expression, if Jinyoung read it right.

“You didn’t.” Mark sounded somehow strict, but at the same time, as if he was trying to be humorous as well, which only made it more obvious that he wasn’t happy about something. “I walked you back to our room myself after some girl almost stole your wallet. And after you dragged me to the dancefloor.”

Jinyoung was shocked, not only by this straightforwardness about the previous night, so unusual for Mark, but also by his own actions – now it was clear whom he was dancing with, despite the fact that he was burning from embarrassment that it was his friend.

“I’m sorry, I… I shouldn’t have—“

“It’s fine.” Mark laughed, and this time it finally sounded natural. “None of us were too sober, so it’s okay. I brought you back in one piece and without any other adventures, asides you being completely hooked on dancing to ballads, trying to run away a few times and making ramen with cold water.”

 _Yeah, definitely sounds like drunk him_ , Jinyoung thought, carefully asking, “Did… anything else happen?”

Mark seemed like this morning he was advocating honesty and teasing. “You started talking about my crush and how you’d make him reciprocate my feelings by making him jealous.”

Jinyoung had a tough time understanding whether Mark was just plainly and shamelessly making this up or not, because that was too wild and crazy even for a drunk him, but from the way his friend’s smile didn’t budge, he knew it probably was true. “Did I do something that crossed the line?”

Mark thought for a while – Jinyoung clearly didn’t remember the kiss, so he was contemplating if it was something very important that would’ve needed a separate mention. It probably was and for a second he looked like he was about to say something, but then Mark quickly changed his mind, deciding that it would just scare Jinyoung away once again. “No, you just fell asleep.”

Jinyoung sighed in relief that he didn’t fuck anything up at least this time and changed the topic. Kind of. “So, how are things with that mysterious dude? With all this drama around, you’d think at least someone deserves happiness and a little love.”

Mark’s eyes were radiating anything but happiness about having to talk about it again, so his response seemed rather rude. “Forget about that crush for once, will you.”

Jinyoung shrugged it off, thinking it wasn’t his business and took Mark’s notes instead, shuffling through pages full of unfamiliar complicated words and quite bizarre illustrations of all the stuff his friend needed to know, offering help in revising. Mark didn’t seem against it, so they spent most of the morning with Jinyoung making various questions out of what he saw in the notebook and Mark answering it, most of the times correctly and more elaborately than it was noted, telling a few jokes about the topic or stories of what happened in his classes. By early afternoon, Jinyoung felt like he himself could pass the test with quite a solid grade; Mark only laughed at that, telling that if Jinyoung was a doctor, he probably would come up with some weird treatment that would probably kill someone, because that's how lucky he was; and Jinyoung couldn't argue with that much.

“You know, there’s this weird thing I noticed.” Mark said, when they finally reached that last topic he was supposed to revise. “They say that sugar burns are one of the most painful ones in their category, because the melting sugar sticks to the skin and it’s not easy to take it off quickly.”

“And what’s weird about that?”

“Some people also use sugar _for_ treating burns. My grandma always used to tell me to wet the burned part and pour sugar all over it, so it wouldn’t leave blisters and scars. It’s weird, isn’t it? You’re legit cured by something that hurt you.” It felt strange, like the words had some deeper meaning, at least it sounded so, but Jinyoung, of course, had to ruin it with his questionable sense of humor.

“Isn’t it slightly impractical? Imagine burning your private parts and dipping it into—“

“Get your mind out of the gutter, Jinyoung, gross.” Mark frowned, but eventually started laughing as well.

Their studying session was disturbed only by rain, the clouds unable to contain all the water anymore and letting it pour down; what started off as a few big drops, in a few seconds turned into a rain so heavy, it felt like someone was pouring buckets on them.

The two friends, however, only laughed, trying to secure the notes by putting them under their sweaters. The least needed thing right now was them getting drenched and catching a cold, but that didn’t stop them from running around the beach like kids, enjoying the rain and chasing each other, ending up face down in the sand, because Mark decided to play dirty and grabbed Jinyoung by the latter’s leg, making them both fall.

Jinyoung felt his stomach hurting from laughter, looking at Mark who was lying next to him breathless and trying to avoid rain getting into his eyes; their clothes were full of wet sand, but they both felt incredibly happy at that moment.

And suddenly, completely unexpectedly, Jinyoung caught himself thinking that he would give away everything in a heartbeat if he was able to listen Mark laughing like that for the rest of his life.

This conclusion for some reason didn’t scare him, it felt natural, like it was always somewhere there in his heart; but then again, Jinyoung remembered that Mark’s heart belonged to that mysterious crush of his, and he thought that he finally truly realized what Jackson was feeling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that... winter bird reference. :)) 
> 
> technically, less mess, but also more mess because jinyoung apparently needed some sand in his sweater to realize that damn, he might have something for mark; but since he's too dumb to take the hint, let's just let them suffer for a while lmao  
> so, we finally know the meaning of the fic title as well, something that heals you after it hurts you, like wow so subtle, i wonder what was that all about :))) 
> 
> okay anyway, i hope you liked it and comments are always welcomed


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> after this fic my playlist will be officially banned from playing jessica's summer storm, blackpink's as if it's your last, pristin's wee woo and we like, and weki meki's i don't like your girlfriend, istg i haven't listened to anything else while writing this entire fic (sans higher, but well, that's a given)

“Oh, it’s you.” That was the only thing Jackson mumbled to his roommates when they finally returned from Pohang the next day.

Initially they were supposed to head to Sokcho before coming back to Seoul, however, Bambam and Yugyeom, after hearing a condensed version of why they had to deal with the entire floor of the hotel complaining about the noise and trying to take a peek at whatever drama was happening, suggested to stop the trip there, because nobody was in the mood to travel anymore. None of them argued with this, Jaebum didn’t even show up to discuss it properly, so Jinyoung simply sent him a text that he should start packing instead of trying to drown himself in misery.

The only people who had their moods somewhat better than the rest of them were Mark and Jinyoung; the latter could’ve sworn that Yugyeom coughed out an “ _ew_ ” when on their way to the bus terminal Mark started to laugh at Jinyoung’s joke so hard, tears spilled from his eyes.

Jackson never texted them the entire time, even though Mark told to let them know once he reached the dorm. Jackson didn't even bother to talk to them at all actually, no matter how hard they tried – he declared _all_ of them guilty for the shit that went down just because they were associated with Jaebum; Jinyoung, as his best friend, of course, suffered the most out of them.

The room was scarily quiet the first day as Jackson demonstratively didn’t say a word to Jinyoung, and Mark, instead of trying to hold a conversation, was gone to a hairdresser to fix the disaster he still had on his head, the brown dye with which Jinyoung tried to save the situation starting to fade and turn into an ever more ugly mess.

The days were passing like that – midterm week came and went, all the homework assignments were turned in; Jackson slowly, in baby steps, started telling more than hello and goodnight to his roommates, however, it still was a little awkward and Jackson still always turned around seeing Jaebum somewhere in corridors.

Time passing brought another new thing as well – the wall next to Jinyoung’s bed was now full of photos they took during the trip, and he could never look at them without flashing a smile. There was a photo of them all in Jeonju, Jinyoung and Mark standing on the opposite sides of it; there was one where he and Jaebum were fighting for the last chicken wing, one where Yugyeom, with a blanket wrapped around his body imitating a dress, was singing some girl group song in Mokpo; there was one where they all were making the ugliest faces they possibly could think of.

There also were two photos from Pohang – one just a simple picture of the sea with all the ships rushing to their destination somewhere in the horizon. Another one was a selfie of Jinyoung and Mark that they took the last day before departing home.

It was blurry and shaky, because Bambam “accidentally” tripped and crashed into them as a joke, and Jinyoung wasn’t sure why he still insisted on printing it out – there was nothing special about the photo, asides the fact that if he wasn’t so blind, he could’ve seen an evolution of some sorts, from him and Mark standing as far as possible from each other to getting closer and closer.

He also wasn’t sure why his heart sometimes fluttered in a weird manner on their way back to Seoul, when Mark would flash a sleepy smile at him or when Mark finally fell asleep on his shoulder as they were sitting together in the bus.

“If it’s Jaebum, tell him I moved out of the dorm or something.” Jackson told one Saturday afternoon hearing someone knocking, when they both were lazing around in their room alone, since Mark was out somewhere yet again.

Jinyoung only rolled his eyes at his, getting up from his bed to see who was knocking so persistently. “You know, it’s been an entire month. Even if you hate him to guts, I think the best option would be to just talk with each other. He might have something to tell you.”

“I don’t care.” It was a blatant lie, because it was obvious that Jackson cared, even if he was searching for his earphones in order to zone the guest out if it really turned out to be Jaebum, having no shame to drop by. “I have a reputation to maintain and I’m not going to allow some asshole hook up with my friends.”

“I’m sorry, but you have no reputation left.” Jinyoung snorted. “Not after you stole Jaebum’s photo from my wall and fell asleep with it on your pillow.”

Jackson didn’t respond to this, pretending he didn’t hear it, even though Jinyoung knew he did – even though with earphones, Jackson wasn’t listening to music, trying to hear everything that was about to be said if it indeed was Jaebum.

And it truly was, Jaebum was a frequent visitor these days, always coming with the same question. “How’s Jackson doing?”

Jinyoung sighed, closing the doors behind himself and stepping out into the corridor, so his roommate wouldn’t eavesdrop. It was ridiculous to be some sort of a mail owl in order for those two tragic lovers to have at least some sort of connection, but he thought that he really didn’t a have a right to complain. “Like a piece of damp bread, figuratively speaking. Sad to watch.”

Jaebum laughed at this comparison, but the sound of it was a little sad and desperate, as he said, “I don’t know what to do anymore, he keeps refusing to talk to me.”

“Well, you _did_ screw up big time. Considering he started talking to me and Mark about two weeks after we returned, when we did absolutely nothing to him, I think he’ll be chill enough to breathe the same air as you, like… Three years later?” Jinyoung joked, but that seemed not to be sitting well with his best friend, as the guy looked downright terrified of this possibility.

“And here I thought sending him a message explaining everything will be a good idea.” Jaebum mumbled, sounding like he was on the verge of giving up on life. “Anyway, since when you’re referring to you and Mark as ‘us’? What happened to _he wants to set my bed on fire when I’m asleep_ and _I can’t stay in one room with him for more than two seconds_?”

“First of all, that’s absolutely irrelevant.” Jinyoung refuted, feeling how for some reason his heart started to beat faster and faster, his cheeks getting slightly pink. “And second, you did _what_?”

Jaebum cursed under his breath, because he wasn’t planning to disclose this, since it failed so tremendously, and neither Jinyoung nor Mark seemed to know about it anyway. So he sat down on the floor of the corridor, ready for a long talk, with his best friend joining him, and admitted, “A few days ago I met up with Youngjae and asked him to talk to Jackson for me.”

Jinyoung’s eyebrows rose up to his hairline as he was staring at Jaebum in a total disbelief. He always thought that his best friend could be stupid only that much to go on a making out spree to patch up his hurt heart, but to go searching for the guy he made out with and tell him to talk to Jackson – that was beyond any kind of stupidity he could possibly imagine. “This is the part where I’m supposed to say _you idiot_ , but I don’t think that’s going to do any justice for what I think about it, and I don’t know an insult profound enough to express it. Why on earth did you do that?”

“Okay, I’m stupid, I get it. No need to rub it into my face like that.” Jaebum said. “It didn’t work out though, seems like he blocked Youngjae’s number or something, so… So one night I texted him myself.”

“Just when I thought this can’t get any worse.” Jinyoung sighed. “What did you write?”

“I wrote him a long ass text about everything that happened in Mokpo, and some other stuff. I know he read it, but never replied.”

Jinyoung frowned, because he was sure he would’ve known about such happening, since Jackson never missed a chance to drag Jaebum in one way or another nowadays, or to sarcastically scoff every time they met somewhere by accident. And then Jinyoung remembered something. “When exactly did you text him?”

“Two, three days ago, why? How’s that important when he didn’t even respond.”

Jinyoung didn’t take long to do some math in his head, and the conclusion both surprised him a little and almost made him cringe, as well as smile, because he couldn’t believe how much of dumbasses his friends are. _Two, three days ago_ was exactly the time when a photo of Jaebum doing some weird shit in Gwangju disappeared from Jinyoung’s wall and he couldn’t figure out where it went until he and Mark, coming back from an impromptu lunch after ditching classes together, found Jackson casually napping with it, tightly clutched in his hand.

Maybe things between them weren’t ruined that badly, after all.

“Why are you smiling like a creep, stop it.”

“Nothing.” Jinyoung shook his head. “But you know, keep trying. You’re doing quite well, surprisingly.”

Jaebum got surprised by this turn of events, but didn’t say anything more about this whole situation, changing the topic. “How are things between you and Mark? Yugyeom keeps texting me about having nightmares thanks to you both being so lovey dovey in Pohang.”

Jinyoung internally swore to himself to snap Yugyeom’s neck in perfect little pieces once they all meet. That wasn’t that far into future – they were planning to join some student festival next week, well, least the after party of it in some club. “We weren’t lovey dovey.”

“He said Mark brought you back to the hotel on his back because you were _too tired to walk_. Let me remind you our hotel was literally five steps away from the sea.” Jaebum noted, spitefully happy to make his best friend miserable in return.

“Okay, _listen_.” Jinyoung hissed, looking around to make sure that no one was in the corridor to hear this conversation. “First off, I got a cut on my foot thanks to some stupid seashell we found, and Mark just wanted to help me out. Second, stop listening to what Yugyeom says, that brat probably still thinks that the Earth is flat. Third, it’s not like something will happen between me and Mark, because he has a damn crush on someone.”

Jaebum’s eyes glimmered with mischievous sparkles hearing this heated speech. He couldn’t hide his amusement at Jinyoung being so up in arms over Jaebum and Jackson’s stupidity and avoidance of their own feelings, but in the end acting exactly the same as them. “So… That means you _did_ think about the possibility of something happening.”

Jinyoung wanted to protest, saying that no, he didn’t, but he never knew how to be convincing once cornered and Jaebum always saw through his lies anyway. He tried to nonchalantly shrug, as if telling it wasn’t that big of a deal. “Maybe. People think about various stuff throughout their lives.”

“No, not really. I mean, I never thought about something happening between us, or something.” Jinyoung wanted to slap that dumb smirk away from Jaebum’s face as the latter continued. “And I don’t think you should worry about his crush.”

“What do you mean? Do you know who it is?” Jinyoung sounded a little too eager to know and his best friend’s smile got even wider, making his cheeks blush ever redder.

However, Jaebum, instead of a normal, straightforward answer, told only a mysterious, “Well, it’s not like you should be worried about fighting against someone like you yourself.”

That made absolutely no sense to Jinyoung, so he told only, “I don’t understand a thing, but keep it in mind and tell Yugyeom – stop spreading shit to each other before it got to Mark. Nothing will come out of this, I don’t even like him—“

It was then that they got interrupted in the most ambiguous part of Jinyoung’s sentence, without even letting the latter finish. Caught in some weird Saturday afternoon’s honesty, he wanted to tell he didn’t think he liked Mark that much to make a move first (which was both truth and a lie at the same time), however, Mark, coming back to the room, heard only the first part, responding to it with, “Poor guy if you don’t even like him. It is someone I know?”

Jinyoung cursed, feeling an urge to have the floor opening and swallowing him alive, because he didn’t know how much Mark heard and why the latter’s face looked like he was trying to fake a casual smile.

“Nah, man. Just talking about my problems.” Jaebum quickly took the cue to come into rescue, but the weird expression on Mark’s face didn’t budge, and it was gradually making Jinyoung feel more and more like an asshole.

“Cool.” Mark said, but didn’t look any happier. “I’m going out again soon, maybe you saw where I put my black jeans? The ones ripped at the knees.”

“Jackson borrowed them a few days ago, search for it in his wardrobe.” Jinyoung replied, surprised that he _knew_ where Mark’s clothes were and that it sounded so sickeningly domestic. It honestly wasn’t anything unusual for them, after their trip they stuck back together just like they did when they were kids, but from the way Jaebum was looking at this scene – with a barely hidden grin – Jinyoung thought that maybe it wasn’t that much of a “it’s only because we’re friends” thing.

Mark wordlessly nodded at it, entering the room, and Jinyoung leaned against a wall, feeling how he slowly was starting to panic, asking, “You think he heard?”

Jaebum never was the most compassionate person ever, bluntly replying, “Yeah, I think he might’ve heard, so I think you also should take your own advice and sit down to talk about things with him. And I should be going, I agreed to meet my friends later as well.”

“To talk with him about what exactly?” Jinyoung mumbled, feeling his heart being very uneasy. It wasn’t like Mark liked him more than a friend; and it wasn’t like Jinyoung was hoping for something either, he was totally cool with being friends.

This conclusion was absolutely wrong, but that evening he got proven wrong only the second part of it.

 

A few hours later, when Mark disappeared from the room again, all this time not saying a word to Jinyoung as if he didn’t exist, the latter decided that there was no reason to wallow in his paranoid thoughts and let Jackson do the same, so he dragged them for a walk outside, to get some fresh air. They ended up walking around the entire neighborhood for hours, which surprisingly was a huge help for Jackson to finally return to his never shutting up self – and even though it was slightly tiring, Jinyoung enjoyed it this time, letting Jackson talk however much he wanted, happy that things weren’t awkward anymore.

The two friends decided to head back just a few minutes before the midnight curfew their dorm had, together with a whole bunch of other residents who decided that this Saturday night wasn’t the most suitable for partying it up. That caused a little commotion at the entrance, with people lining up with their dorm IDs to show them to the security guard, and stopping in the lobby to have a chitchat with their friends. Jackson wasn’t an exception, as soon as he set his feet in the lobby, he met a coursemate of his and engaged into a conversation of some sorts, making Jinyoung bored, because he didn’t know the guy.

But then suddenly, and quite typically to their lives by the time, things soon turned to a more interesting side.

“Jackson Wang, we need to talk.” Someone exclaimed, and Jinyoung rolled his eyes, knowing way too well whom the voice belonged to. That someone was none other than a shitface drunk Im Jaebum, seeming like he was waiting for them to come back, and Jinyoung thought that he should’ve figured out earlier why Jackson was stubbornly declining someone’s calls earlier and refusing to tell Jinyoung who it was.

“No, we don’t.” Jackson said, trying to slowly move backwards to the entrance of the guys’ side of the dorms to avoid a public scene, because Jaebum certainly didn’t look like he was about to let this opportunity go. “Talk to Youngjae, if you want it so much. Or do whatever you both like to do when you get left alone for a few hours.”

His voice didn’t sound like he was mad, though, Jackson was more wary of the people looking at the scene with curious stares, thirsty for some good angsty student drama before starting a new week.

“I don’t want to talk to Youngjae, I want to talk to you.” Jaebum insisted, slurring his words to the point it was hard to understand, and Jackson shook his head in annoyance.

“Sober up, Jaebum.”

“I love you.”

The entire lobby, including the security guard, who was about to go check what was this mass of people doing in the lobby for so long, froze in their places. Jinyoung was stunned, because he had never heard Jaebum saying these words seriously to anyone except his parents, so he must’ve been truly smitten to openly admit it to Jackson while a shitload of people were listening.

Jackson tried not to show his facial expression changing, but it was obvious it got a little softer, however, he only rolled his eyes and told, “Yeah, sure.”

And then it seemed like Jaebum got out of his mind completely, because suddenly he grabbed Jackson’s arm, with the latter trying to back away while closing his eyes as if afraid that Jaebum would hurt him; but the gasps from people made him look again, only to see Jaebum, drunk out of his mind, on his knees and with a few flowers in his hand.

Jinyoung had to bite his cheek in order not to start laughing, because while it was truly adorable, it was also extremely funny, reminding of a romantic comedy you’d see in cinemas – the flowers were obviously from a small garden they had behind the dorm, and they were definitely picked a few hours ago, already withering right in front of them, the leaves and petals dropping on the floor with every movement.

“What the fuck are you doing, get yourself together.” Jackson hissed, trying to pull him up from the ground. “Okay, we can talk tomorrow if you want it that much, just stop embarrassing yourself.”

“I know I fucked up and that I’m an asshole,” Jaebum cut him off with his speech, the one he probably won’t even remember the next morning, but that wasn’t the point at the moment. “But I’m sorry, and I truly do like you. I’m just so sad and pathetic, and you make me smile so much, so please, love me back?”

A few _awww_ s coming from some girls followed his words, and even Jinyoung found himself genuinely smiling at this confession. Even though drunk, sentimental, mushy and causing a scene for the whole dorm to talk about for days later, Jaebum subconsciously knew where to aim, because Jackson didn’t hold his smile back anymore either, cheeks red and eyes looking warmly at the romantic dumbass that Jaebum was.

“You really mean it this time?” Jackson asked, still pretending to be unconvinced.

“Yes.” Jaebum put his hand next to his heart, swearing by all the saints he knew, and nodding as hard as his drunk body allowed him, meaning that he almost planted his face into the floor. Thankfully, Jackson was there to catch him and finally pull him back up on his feet.

“We’ll see about that, then.” Jackson said, trying to hide the fact that he felt like he was going to cry for some reason, as his eyes started watering and he started to feel like he was about to sneeze. “Jesus, you reek of alcohol.” He noted when Jaebum hugged him like a huge teddy bear. “Let’s bring you back to your room first, okay?”

Jinyoung would’ve been extremely happy that night, for his friends solving their mess and (probably, as they still needed a sober confirmation) finally becoming an official couple, if not for one thing he saw when he turned around for a split second.

And it was Mark Tuan, returning from his own adventures just in time to witness this entire scene, and curiously coming closer to see what was happening. It was nothing weird at first, if not for one small detail – there was a guy with him, Jinyoung thought he knew the guy, he was this another exchange student from Canada, Brian Kang. That particular Brian Kang had his arm wrapped around Mark’s waist all the time – and that was where Jinyoung got proved wrong.

Deep inside Jinyoung must’ve hoped for something to happen between him and Mark after all, because why else did it feel like it was hard for him to breathe looking at that sight?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah, now that one mess is finally cancelled with the mushiest and most sugary love confession my mind could possibly work with, we have a new mess, hello youngk. good news tho - only three more updates and you'll get rid of me lmao
> 
> anyway, i hope you liked it, and all the comments and complaints, and screams are welcomed in the comment section.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> honestly, 90% of the problems in this fic would be solved if people weren't constantly drunk here, i sometimes feel like altering the rating just because of the amounts of alcohol consumed in this story lmao

Jinyoung suddenly felt cold, really really cold upon seeing Mark and Brian not wasting much time to look at the sight of sneezing Jackson trying to drag hammered Jaebum back to his room, contrary to a whole bunch of other residents of the dorm, who stayed to gush about what just happened in front of their eyes and how cute it was.

The two guys disappearing in the blink of an eye, with Brian’s arm now around Mark’s shoulders, left Jinyoung shivering for a reason that definitely had absolutely nothing to do with the weather, since late spring’s warmth was hitting the city with full force; the biggest problem was that he had no idea what the reason was _exactly_. To accompany this weird sensation, Jinyoung felt how his mood was also gradually sinking and hitting every possible low, in a span of few seconds travelling through the entire spectrum of emotions – from fake indifference, to surprise, to disappointment, to just… feeling stupid.

A few moments later, when Jinyoung was forced to snap out of this weird blur and shift his stare away from the entrance of the guys’ side of the dorm – the last place he saw Mark waiting for an elevator and laughing at some joke of Brian’s – it was because of his phone impatiently buzzing in vibration in the pocket of his jeans. The caller ID surprised him as much as the call itself, as well as tied his insides into a weird anxious knot, since it was none other than Mark.

At first, Jinyoung didn’t want to pick up at all, knowing that his voice will give away that something was wrong in seconds, besides, he was sure that Mark still had the ability to read him like an open book better than anyone else, Jaebum included; however, a few more buzzes later, he finally decided that there was no reason to avoid the guy anymore – he’d done enough of that already and look how it ended. “What’s up?” that was the only careful sentence he managed to tell after answering the call, still standing in the lobby like an idiot.

“Where are you?” Mark asked, sounding like he just had a laughing fit, and Jinyoung could hear quite clearly that Brian was still laughing somewhere near. Probably something must’ve been truly funny, he bitterly thought.

Jinyoung wanted to say he was out for the night, maybe with his friends, but he wasn’t sure if that would’ve worked – knowing his luck, or the chronic lack of it, Mark could’ve actually seen him watching Jaebum’s impromptu confession or something, so he came up with another lie, to create himself a reason to avoid their room for as long as possible. “In the laundry room, remembered I had some stuff to wash.”

“Laundry at midnight? Well that’s something new.” Mark wasn’t exactly convinced, but even if he felt that something about this answer was odd, he didn’t show it, as there apparently were more important things to discuss. “Listen, I have a favor to ask.”

“Yeah?”

Jinyoung didn’t know what he was expecting, maybe Mark asking him to sleep elsewhere for tonight, so he and Brian would have some private space for _doing stuff_ , or something else that fit into the so-called “bro code” where he wouldn’t have had any right to refuse, but it took a bit different turn. “My friend probably lost his room keys and there’s no way for him to get a spare one since the security in the lobby don’t keep them. The dorm administration will work only in the morning, so I was wondering if you would mind if he slept in our room for the night till his roommate gets back? Jackson said he’s not planning to return for the night, probably because of Jaebum.” Mark suddenly chuckled, straying away from the initial topic and asking if Jinyoung knew about the love confession. After the latter’s response that yeah, he did, which was totally weird considering he declared being in the laundry room all the time, Mark continued, “So anyway, Jackson said he doesn’t mind someone sleeping in his bed, but I thought I’d still ask you, just in case you’re uncomfortable, or something.

Jinyoung started to feel like the main character of some weird sitcom, where bad things happen all at once – after getting punched in the face by the fact that he for some reason felt upset about someone else being the reason behind Mark’s smile, now he was asked if _it was okay for some Brian to sleep in their room_. Honestly, he wanted to say no, because he wasn’t into self-torture that much to listen Mark and Brian happily talking all night, or worse, doing something else; however, he didn’t want to make a scene either, knowing that all these late realizations were his own fault anyway.

“Jinyoung?” Probably he was silent for a tad bit too long for it not to seem suspicious, because Mark called his name several times, before the younger found it in himself to answer.

“Okay, sure.” He knew that nothing good will come out of this sleepover, at least for his sanity, but it wasn’t like he had another choice without having to explain it somehow. And Jinyoung didn’t want to explain anything to anyone, as he was just as confused about all these newly found feelings.

He took his time to return to the room, slowly dragging himself up the stairs to the eighth floor instead of waiting for an elevator, his burning legs perfectly working as a distraction from his thoughts. However, the stairs weren’t endless, he was bound to reach the right floor after some wandering – it was 1 AM already, and he couldn’t keep walking back and forth the corridor of their floor for the entire night, looking like a weird creep if someone took a look at the CCTV footage.

“Didn’t you say you were doing laundry?” Mark asked, when he finally entered the room, empty-handed and forgotten about all the previously told lies. The fact that he was wearing clothes that were used more for going out and taking walks rather than just staying inside didn’t help much either.

Jinyoung mumbled something vague and unclear to the question, so his roommate didn’t really understand, but Mark didn’t have a chance to ask something more, because Brian basically jumped from his bed in front of Jinyoung, introducing himself and thanking for letting him stay for what seemed like thirty times; Jinyoung had to put on his best fake smile and suffer through all the guy’s blabbering.

He saw that despite the late night time the two friends (or lovers, who the heck knew at his point) were far from being sleepy, and Jinyoung wasn’t about to listen to them trying to talk to each other shouting from two different beds, so he ended up offering Mark to sleep in his bed for tonight, so he and Brian would occupy the entire bunkbed Jinyoung usually shared with Jackson, and Jinyoung would sleep in Mark’s, just for that extra internal suffering.

Mark gladly took the offer without thinking twice, and that’s how Jinyoung, after taking a shower, ended up in his friend’s bedsheets dragged up till his nose, pretending to be asleep. Unfortunately, his racing thoughts didn’t allow him to, even though he wouldn’t have minded passing out for the upcoming week.

He heard the two guys still talking, or more like still whispering, as they had enough decency to at least try to stay as quiet as possible; it made Jinyoung sad though, because some weird frightening clearance was creeping into his mind – Mark’s crush was real and it most probably was Brian Kang, judging from how comfortable they seemed around each other, with all those warm smiles and inside jokes. And Jinyoung had no clue what Jaebum was trying to say when he told that fighting against Mark’s crush he would be fighting against himself – he was nothing like Brian, therefore, there was no chance for something to happen.

With all these thoughts suffocating him, Jinyoung drifted to a restless sleep only after a few hours, dreaming all kinds of disturbing nonsense, for example, trying to kiss Mark; it felt somehow familiar, but Jinyoung, waking up with cold sweat on his forehead just to see Mark finally dozed off in his bed, didn’t know why.

 

The following weeks didn’t bring many news at first – only Jinyoung avoiding Mark, which was already kind of an old thing, and Mark for some reason clearly avoiding Jinyoung, which was new, with the younger creating more and more morbid scenarios why. Brian dropped by to meet his friend more and more often, but they never stayed inside, mostly leaving Jinyoung with Jackson for the latter to shoot weird glares at his roommate if he wasn’t busy being gross with his now official boyfriend Jaebum.

During the last week before their final exams, however, the same day all seven friends of more than tragically dramatic trip around Korea decided to meet in some club downtown to let off some steam, Jinyoung learned a shocking fact – Mark was going home. He came to know it accidentally, coming from his classes earlier that Friday to take a nap before getting ready to club all night, and walking in on Mark packing, or more like sitting on the floor among piles of clothes totally stressed out.

“What are you doing?” Jinyoung carefully asked, stuttering a bit, as they probably were talking to each other for the first time in days.

“Packing, obviously.” Mark laughed a little while standing up, but it sounded somehow fake. “My plane leaves tomorrow. Oh, I probably forgot to tell you, sorry.”

To say that Jinyoung was shocked was an understatement, because _who the fuck forgets to tell such an important information as leaving the country?_ No matter how he felt about the whole Brian thing, Jinyoung wasn’t ready to let Mark go again, at least as a friend, but the fact that Mark didn’t bother to tell him, hurt. A lot. “Wait, how? Why? There’s still the exam week.”

“I asked the professors to let me take all the tests earlier.” Mark explained, searching for something in his wardrobe, and it started to finally make sense why during the last few days he barely slept, always having various textbooks in his hands. “There are some family things going on, so I need to get back to the States as early as possible.”

“Well,” Jinyoung bitterly smiled, knowing the feeling of Mark leaving Korea way too well. He thought that over the years it should hurt less, but he was proven wrong once again, feeling something stuck in his throat. “At least we’ll meet in August again.”

But these words, unfortunately, were met with an apologetic smile. “I don’t know about that yet. This was just an exchange program for me, and I’m not sure if I’m going to stay for another semester.”

It seemed like these words were meant to say something else, having some sort of an underlying meaning as if Mark wanted to get a certain reaction, but Jinyoung had no clue what reaction it was supposed to be, thinking that it would be great to have a manual on how to read Mark Tuan; however at this point he was sure that even if he got one, it would be written in a foreign language with no translations and with a few missing pages. Jinyoung was clueless and probably with a hopeless crush – and with a huge pride that stupidly made things only worse.

“Need help packing, then?” He didn’t even realize what he just said and how cold it sounded. It was obvious that Mark didn’t expect this, lips twitching as if he was about to say something, but none of them spoke up anymore, just the older guy daringly, with some sort of challenge and sarcasm in his voice, asked Jinyoung to help him zip up the suitcases once he was done.

If a few weeks earlier Jinyoung told that Jackson looked like a piece of damp bread, wallowing in misery and angst, now he was feeling exactly the same way even after a few hours of napping and a few shots of soju he drank once they all met up in the club.

Apparently, Mark forgot to tell he was leaving only to Jinyoung, everyone else knew, so their meeting turned more into a sappy farewell party with tipsy Youngjae (whom Jackson forgave after he made things clear with Jaebum and unblocked his number) saying dramatic toasts and speeches, Yugyeom and Bambam making fun of everything moving, mostly Jinyoung, because of his obvious damp bread state.

Originally, Jinyoung was determined to remain sober this time, remembering how much trouble he brought on himself after getting wasted in Pohang; but when a certain Brian Kang appeared next to them, “accidentally” being in the same club with his friends (which sounded like an utter bullshit if someone asked Jinyoung, but, unfortunately, nobody did), and everyone agreed to let them join their crew, he decided to fuck up all his plans.

“Mark talks about you a lot, you know.” Brian said to him a few hours later, when most of the people were out on the dancefloor. Mark, on the other hand, was probably somewhere else as he didn’t show much interest in dancing that night.

“Oh really.” Jinyoung replied, downing another shot of alcohol; it probably wasn’t soju anymore, but his throat was already numb and couldn’t tell the difference, but whatever worked to zone the unpleasant conversation out until at least someone from his friends return.

“Yeah.” Brian wasn’t the most sober either, but he spoke clearly and in a friendly way.

That was the biggest problem – Jinyoung couldn’t bring himself to dislike Brian, because the guy wasn’t shady at all, he was always friendly and funny, wishing only good for other people while wearing his heart on his sleeve, and it was obvious why others liked him so much. There was nothing complicated about Brian, unlike about Jinyoung, and if there was someone else he wanted Mark to end up with, it probably would’ve been someone like Brian. And that conclusion hurt as hell.

“What did he say?” He wasn’t looking forward to the answer though.

“He said that sometimes you’re a pain in the ass,” Among many other traits, Brian seemed to have some brutal honesty at times. “And that you ignore him whenever you feel like so without explaining anything, but he still likes you. You were his best friend since childhood and all, you’re like a brother to him.”

That might’ve been not the best wording ever, Jinyoung choked on yet another drink as he was downing them as if he was drinking water, because he certainly didn’t want to listen anymore. Words “like a brother” were probably one of the worst things in this situation – because only this moment, when Jinyoung was on his way to get an alcohol poisoning again, and when Mark was supposed to leave the country next day and maybe never come back, it was quite fitting for his heart to admit that maybe he indeed _was_ feeling something to his friend.

That was the only logical explanation of why Jinyoung’s heart was fluttering and jumping out of its place every time Mark even looked at him, but sadly, the realization came a little too late, making Jinyoung… angry.

“Great. Since things are like that, tell him that his brother went home.” He told, standing up without much confidence about his legs keeping him up, felling all wobbly and uncoordinated. Brian didn’t manage to ask where the hell and why he was leaving, as Jinyoung was surprisingly fast, deciding to visit the bathroom before getting out of the club.

Unfortunately, there was a huge line in front of it and his eyes met none other than Mark, still waiting despite the fact that it was good fifteen minutes since he left. He looked at Jinyoung surprised, as if not expecting to see his friend, but still waved him over saying, “You can wait with me, so you wouldn’t need to stand in the line for the upcoming few years.” He sounded like he wasn’t drunk at all, and he probably wasn’t, considering that he still had a flight to catch in the morning and wasn’t a fan of having a thirteen hour long trip hungover.

However, Jinyoung was totally drunk, feeling all those drinks kicking in, _and_ angry, what wasn’t the best combo out there, so he simply glared at the guy and spat out a sarcastic, “No, thanks. Your _brother_ can wait.”

Mark only looked at him questioningly, having no clue what was that about, and his natural reaction was to say, “What are you talking about?”

“Oh, don’t play dumb.” Jinyoung knew that he probably was going to regret talking like this, but that moment he didn’t really care, he just wanted to yell his frustration out. “You go around talking shit with your crushes about how I’m your childhood best friend and how I’m like a brother to you, and then you act all surprised when it reaches me.”

Mark finally understood what Jinyoung was talking about, lips pursing into a tight line, grabbing his friend’s arm and dragging him out of the bathroom, as it wasn’t the best place to sort their relationships out. “So you talked with Brian, I see.” Mark’s voice was strict as he was leaning against a wall in some corner, where there weren’t that many people to eavesdrop.

“More like he talked to me.” Jinyoung told, feeling angrier and angrier as the conversation continued. He didn’t mention any names on purpose, wanting to see what conclusion Mark was going to make, and to hear that he immediately thought about Brian upon mentioning his crush was the biggest proof of everything Jinyoung was thinking all this time. “What’s his problem anyway, why does he think he has any right to be bragging about how you talk about me with him?”

“I don’t know,” Mark finally snapped, voice full of sarcasm. “Maybe because all this time it was him who acted like an actual friend? Maybe it was him who got me through all the shit that I encountered getting back to Korea after ten years without ignoring me and playing this stupid push and pull whenever he felt like it?”

It was strange seeing Mark like that, losing his shit and looking so, so angry, but Jinyoung only scoffed at that, completely failing to read between the lines. “What shit could he help you with? You know him for two weeks, tops.”

Mark unbelievingly shook his head. “I’ve been mentioning him since the day I got here. Maybe if you listened at least once, you would’ve heard his name somewhere. I was going through a whole lot of shit lately, but you didn’t even seem to care enough to ask, so don’t act surprised when there are people who actually are willing to help others.”

“Oh for god’s sake, don’t play a victim.” Jinyoung almost prayed that someone would stop him from speaking, but the feelings that were bottled up for so long finally reached the surface for him too. “As if you ever asked how _I_ feel after you left to your stupid America.”

“You didn’t seem that lonely, remember how our phone calls always went with _Jaebum this, Jaebum that?_ ” It was petty, Mark knew it himself, but he was pushed to his limits thanks to everything was going on around him and constant stress. “But I’m not going to explain myself to you when you’re wasted, I see no point. Just get it in your head – Brian isn’t my crush, he’s here just because he’s a _friend_ , something that you failed to be this time around.”

Jinyoung wanted to say something insulting, to pay back for the hurtful words, but got silent in the middle of the sentence, now knowing that once again he fucked things up by overthinking. “He’s… not?”

“No.” Mark shook his head again, and it was obvious he was done with this entire conversation as his cheeks were red from anger. “And anyway, why do you care so much who my crush is? You didn’t seem interested in me all this time, asides when you almost kissed me in Pohang.” He cursed under his breath, because he didn’t plan on ever revealing it, but now it was too late.

“I… What?”

It seemed like Mark won’t answer, but slowly, he opened his mouth. “When I brought you back to our room, we talked about my crush and you decided that you have a plan on how to make him jealous by kissing me. You fell asleep halfway, so thank god nothing happened.”

 _Thank god_. These words cut deep into Jinyoung’s ears, cancelling out any music coming from speakers, for a while even making him forget that they were in a club to begin with. _Thank god nothing happened_. Mark didn’t want anything to happen, it was simple as that – he didn’t like Jinyoung at all, what was the most natural conclusion, considering their relationship.

“I was drunk, it didn’t mean anything.” Jinyoung told defensively. “I wouldn’t have tried it if I had at least a tiny bit more sober mind. It’s all your fault anyway.” He blurted out, without really meaning it. He just wanted to push away the imagery of him kissing Mark, because it felt so, so scary, as it was nothing but a proof that Jinyoung was an idiot. A drunk idiot who apparently was in love even before he realized it. “Sending all those mixed signals, being all nice and flirty and shit, then ignoring me for the last weeks, “forgetting” to tell me you’re leaving, what’s up with that? Well, anyway you still have your crush to go after don’t you, good luck.”

It cut the cord within Mark, and he suddenly seemed like he got drained out of all emotions, it was just his voice, calm but scarily angry at the same time. “You know what, Jinyoung, fuck off. If you’re blind, I don’t know how to make you see things.”

Jinyoung wasn’t a fan of being talked with like that, and especially being told to fuck off, so he turned around even faster than Mark managed to leave, trying to get through a bunch of people to finally get out of there, because he thought that one second more and he’ll start breathing fire.

_Stupid Mark, stupid everything, who does he think he is to talk to him like that._

Jinyoung felt that he might’ve broken a few glasses while passing by the bar and walking into people on purpose to let his anger out somehow, trying to blink out those few angry tears that seemed to be sobering him up a little. He saw Jackson and Jaebum still on the dancefloor stuck together so close that it looked like someone poured a few tubes of superglue between them, then, on the way to exit, he bumped into Youngjae and Bambam, those two having countless bottles of various drinks in their arms.

Bambam grabbed his arm, shouting into his ear to outvoice the music. “This is going to be amazing, the drinking game of the century! Go big or go home, hyung!”

Jinyoung, however, shook his arm off, leaving both of his friends confused. “Well luckily, I _am_ going home, so you can go big on your own. Oh, and tell Mark that he can fuck off himself.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my friend, who has read this chapter earlier, @ the line "Jinyoung had no clue what reaction it was supposed to be" : "well idk maybe something obvious like, I'M A DUMBASS WHO LOVES YOU SO PLS LET'S SIT DOWN AND TALK THINGS OUT AND DON'T LEAVE", and honestly, mood
> 
> okayyyy, markjin's definitely messy, but well, we're back to the things that happened in chapter one, and they're at least making progress in talking about their bottled up feelings, finally, so it's safe to say that the ending is very near, only two weeks left lmao, maybe even less if i suddenly start feeling like double-updating one week.  
> anyway, excuse all the possible typos if there are any, i hope you liked all this messy mess, and comments are always welcomed


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, at first i think i should explain things about this chapter's structure a little.  
> this entire story started from a scene where jaebum wakes up jinyoung from his drunk messiness after fighting with mark because mark is going back to the states and jaebum is a strong supporter of the idea that markjin should talk about things. in the very same chapter, jinyoung kind of starts rewinding everything that happened all the way back to their childhood, so basically chapters 1 (or at least, the 2nd half of it) - 11 were some sort of memories, hence the past tense, since you may have noticed that chapter 1 actually starts in a present tense.  
> so now, after chapter 11, the "circle" is kind of closed now, are we're back to the present times of the same day jaebum wakes jinyoung up, however, i didn't feel like it was fair to just paste half of the first chapter for you all to read again, so i just dropped a few details and links to it and continued on, so you'd actually be able to read new things from me. if anything's unclear though, feel free to get back to the chapter 1 first, haha, and skjhdfkdsja i'm sorry for not thinking things through and any confusion you might experience!!!

_“You don’t like him that much, but your phone password is his birthday?”_

Jaebum’s words keep endlessly echoing in Jinyoung’s head as he’s trying to take the quickest shower ever, zoning out the latter’s yells that he has to move his ass if he doesn’t want to get late to try fixing his sad love life. Truth is, he himself never realized what his phone password is exactly – sure he _does know_ the digits, but Jinyoung never associated them with Mark specifically, completely forgetting that it’s his birthday date.

But now that he thinks about it, it probably was his subconscious working in its own magical way, putting everything into neat little shelves deep in his mind – Jinyoung got the phone as a present from his parents a few weeks after the new semester started and by that time Mark was already living with him and Jackson.

So maybe it indeed is a sign that Jinyoung didn’t hate the guy as much as he pretended to after all, and that realization strikes him whole few months too late, but hey, better late than never; the only problem is that airports don’t work that way.

Honestly speaking, Jinyoung would still gladly chicken out and run away to hide for the rest of his life, and it’s not because he’s afraid of finally expressing his very confusing and complicated feelings – it’s because Mark was right last night, he truly wasn’t the textbook definition of a good friend, and nobody can predict whether words like _“hey I know that I was an ass all this time, but I think I like you, so please don’t go?”_ will be enough in this situation. However, Jaebum, being a true friend he is, holds his elbow the entire time they speed walk to a subway station for his best friend to catch a train going to the airport, so that the latter wouldn’t get any second thoughts after they stormed out of the dorm as if there was fire, Jinyoung’s hair still wet. Jaebum doesn’t join him in the subway itself though, saying that he has to do it alone.

The trip from their dorm to Incheon is not short by any means, and Jinyoung, finally done transferring to the so-called airport railroad, catches himself impatiently tapping his foot and nervously looking at a clock while sinking into one of the seats. At least it’s an express train, so they won’t stop in every possible stop, going straight to Incheon without any disturbances, it seems, meaning they will save…

A short glimpse at a small screen inside the train showing the schedules tells him they’ll save about nine minutes, and Jinyoung curses under his breath. Some foreigner, also headed to the airport, chuckles at him.

Jinyoung closes his eyes irritated, the pounding headache both from hangover and this absurd situation not helping the fact that he’s about to spend around forty minutes aimlessly panicking before reaching his destination. He starts thinking, probably not the best activity when you’re this prone to overthinking and drawing all the wrong conclusions, trying to nitpick every possible emotion he has ever felt for Mark Tuan; unfortunately there are just _too many_ of them – hurt, sadness, jealousy, anger, annoyance… Happiness, attachment.

One episode from their childhood suddenly finds its way back into Jinyoung’s mind; he can’t be one hundred percent sure about how accurate it is, because his memories about this particular day are quite foggy, considering it’s been, like, a bit less than fifteen years, but he’s pretty sure it _did_ happen.

 

_Jinyoung was seven back then and Mark had just celebrated his eighth birthday, and they were playing in the playground of their neighborhood; or more like Jinyoung was sitting in the swings ranting about his first days of elementary school while Mark was pushing him, patiently listening to the ramble._

_“It’s just boring.” Jinyoung complained with a little lisp, since he lost his front tooth a few days ago as well. He just could believe it – Mark always told school was really interesting and cool, they played a lot of soccer and gathered to play tag during the lunch break, and Jinyoung’s class had_ none _of that. “We’re learning to read, hyung. To_ read.” _That was the most insulting to Park Jinyoung, who started reading children books at the age of five, because now he had to wait for his classmates to finish a sentence while he was done with the entire page. “And our teacher always nags at me thinking I’m too lazy to study, when I actually I finish all the tasks even before others start. It’s just so unfair, hyung, your classes are so much cooler.”_

_Mark didn’t say anything for a while, waiting for his best friend to finish, knowing the kid way too well to try interrupting; he just kept pushing the swings even though his arms were already starting to hurt. Only when it seemed like Jinyoung won’t say anything more, Mark softly told, “Not every kid is as smart as you are, Jinyoung. Just be more patient and let others catch up. Besides, our classes aren’t that cool anyway, math sucks in second grade.” He even made a face to strengthen the effect of true elementary school horrors and make his friend feel better._

_Jinyoung was trying to hide his smile hearing that, because for some reason he always liked and felt proud whenever Mark praised him, so he only dramatically sighed instead. “I guess you’re right, I shouldn’t be mad about that. Besides I’m already in trouble at home, I don’t need to fail school too.”_

_Mark finally got tired of pushing Jinyoung due to his aching arms, so he plopped into the empty swings next to his friend and asked, “What did you do?”_

_“My sisters kept trying to convince me to let them paint my lips, so I called them dumb cows and while they were sleeping I threw away all their lipsticks.” Jinyoung pouted and Mark started laughing. This boy truly was something else ever since childhood. “Now I won’t be getting allowance till I pay them back. Why do girls even need it though? But my dad only laughed at and said that once I grow up and start buying lipsticks as presents for my girlfriend, then I’ll understand.” Jinyoung frowned, still scandalized about this statement. “As if I’m going to date, girls are stupid, dating is stupid.”_

_Mark enthusiastically agreed with all his eight years worth of experience and wisdom. “My sister was dating someone recently, I walked in on them kissing,_ yuck _.” He shuddered remembering this bizarre happening. “She didn’t talk to me for a week, because I told our parents, but they didn’t even say anything, just patted my head while laughing and said I’ll understand when I start dating myself.”_

 _“Do we_ really _have_ _to date someone when we grow up?”_

_Mark shrugged, neither his parents nor sisters haven’t disclosed him that yet. “If they say so, I guess?” After a short pause, he came up with a brilliant idea, brightly smiling and enthusiastic. “We can date each other when we grow up! We’re friends already, so we know everything about each other, I know what cereal you like and you know what games I like to play, it’s perfect?”_

_Jinyoung looked at Mark in awe, as if the older boy just made a groundbreaking discovery. “We can do that? Date each other?” After his best friend nodded without even actually knowing the answer to this question, Jinyoung slowly nodded as well. “Okay then, let’s date.”_

_“Once we grow up.” Mark reminded him._

_“Once we grow up.”_

_They didn’t touch the topic anymore, the childish promise still lingering in the air. One of the neighborhood girls strolled into the playground and started making faces and teasing them, so the two friends exchanged annoyed glances and jumped from the springs to catch the girl and teach her a lesson._

_Dating was long forgotten when both of their parents a few hours later were lecturing them about why it’s not okay to threaten to pull out a girl’s hair, even if she called them sissies first._

Jinyoung warmly smiles remembering this – it’s such an old memory, he still called Mark hyung back then, the agreement to drop all the possible formal titles coming only after a few years when Mark told him that nobody calls their best friends like that in the States; and that’s what they were at the time, best friends.

He can help but think how naïve they were back then though, thinking that all you need to know for dating is what cereal another person likes, or what toys they play with. Being kids, they didn’t realize all the possible complications – drifting apart, arguments, pining, jealousy; they didn’t even specify when their “once we grow up” was supposed to be.

And none of that matters now anyway.

The clock in Jinyoung’s phone tells they still have around twenty minutes of being stuck in the train, the view through the window offering quite a nice sight of a late morning in suburbs, as if to make fun of his misery. He doesn’t dwell on that for too long though, his attention caught by the screen in front of him changing into a flight departure schedule. For a split second Jinyoung’s heart sinks after he fails to find a Los Angeles destination, fortunately, it turns out he only skipped it out of impatience – Mark’s plane is supposed to set off after two and a half hours.

Jinyoung starts praying to all the possible gods out there that he wouldn’t be late; a flight delay would be ideal now, or even better yet, the checking-in system unexpectedly shutting down, but he knows there’s only a slim chance of it actually happening.

The last few minutes before the subway train finally arrives to the airport station and Jinyoung gets off are plain hell – he has to gather all his remaining sanity in order not to start pushing through all the people, who trying to gather their suitcases and bags.

The airport itself isn’t his friend today either – after running up the escalator to what seems like a good fourth floor, he gets stuck at the subway exit gates, Jaebum’s card for some reason unusable anymore, and his hysterical speech about not being able to get into the airport’s main building immediately putting off a staff worker.

She only raises her eyebrows, letting him in through the staff-regulated entrance after telling that he ruined the card somehow, because it’s now dented, but Jinyoung doesn’t care, Jaebum can roast his ass about that later.

From there, Jinyoung feels like in some sort of a drama, looking around like crazy. Mark can be anywhere in the building – maybe he decided to grab a meal before checking-in, maybe he thought that it’s a great idea to take a walk around the airport for some reason, maybe he’s in one of the many corridors leading to the departure hall; there are so many possibilities, it’s scary.

Thank god, his brain isn’t completely fried by all the stress, so while running down a corridor to reach the departures, after stopping to quickly check where passengers bound for LA are supposed to check-in, he takes out his phone and actually tries to call Mark. However, the latter doesn’t pick up, and Jinyoung thinks it’s disappointing, but definitely not surprising. He brought it upon himself, but that doesn’t make it less stressful and terrifying.

People stare at him like’s crazy when he keeps running around the check-in area, but Jinyoung couldn’t give less fucks about others’ opinions right now – he can’t tell if there’s a familiar figure waiting in the line, because there are just too many people with their piles of luggage. So he does the second most logical thing in this situation – takes out his phone again and dials Jaebum’s number.

“Should I say my congratulations already? It’s a little too early, so I didn’t manage to write a sappy speech, bu—“ The latter picks up pretty quickly, however Jinyoung cuts him off in the middle of an unbearable joke.

“Call Mark and find out where exactly in the airport he is.”

“I—“

“Just find out where he is and text me!” Jinyoung yells out finishing the call and looking around once again, attracting a few more judging stares.

After starting to lose hope, what happens approximately three seconds later, because the airport is just too huge and crowded to find someone, feeling like it’s the same as searching for a needle in a haystack, Jinyoung goes straight to a security guard who’s walking around, and asks, “Excuse me, did you perhaps see a guy here, brown hair, somewhere around my height, maybe only a bit smaller? He has a flight to Los Angeles to catch, so I’m sure he should’ve been here.”

The security guy is less than thrilled, because he has more work to do than to answer weird questions of every twenty-something, but still asks, sighing, “What was he wearing?”

“I… Don’t know.” Jinyoung bites his lip, because he truly has no clue – they haven’t seen each other today, actually he has no idea as to how Mark managed to come back to the dorm and take his suitcases without waking anyone up; but then he decides that it was because he was sleeping like dead, thanks to his anger and drunkenness.

“Listen kid, I can’t help you if you know only the hair color and height. Do you even imagine how many people pass by here on a daily basis?” The security guard says, even trying to sound nice, but Jinyoung doesn’t listen anymore, mumbling something about the uselessness of security these days, and then he decides that screw everything, he’s going to storm into the check-in area again, going straight to the check-in desk with the same question.

People waiting for their turn aren’t very into this, softly speaking, telling him to stand in the line, and the airport worker looks at him like he’s gone completely nuts – and by that time Jinyoung truly feels so – but the answer, even though worded differently, is the same.

“I’m sorry, we’re not allowed to share a passenger’s flight information without their permission or an official request of authorities.”

Jaebum isn’t calling or texting back either, and Jinyoung slowly starts to accept the worst scenario becoming true – he fucked up once again, too late and too stupid to realize his true feelings. Now Mark is leaving again and probably isn’t planning on coming back, thinking that his childhood best friend is an asshole, so everything’s lost, and he can already start beating himself up for this for the rest of the eternity.

However, it seems like the universe still has some pity, as someone bumps into him, an old couple who are rushing to go through the security check. Jinyoung, rubbing his hurt shoulder, turns his gaze to follow them, trying his best not to curse at them, but instead of the couple, his eyes spots another person.

It’s undoubtedly Mark, looking a little lonely and tired, standing in the same line for the security check. Even watching from afar he’s clearly sleepy, brown hair a sloppy mess, and he’s yawning, but Jinyoung’s heart flutters at the sight so badly, he thinks he’s going to have a heart attack; but at the same time, this is the strongest heart flutter he has ever felt, confirming everything he’s been oblivious to this entire time.

He likes Mark, and it’s not because there are some lingering attachment to their childhood spent together. He _loves_ Mark Tuan, the same one who always wakes up at 7 AM on Sundays to go for a run and once tried to convince Jinyoung to join him; the same one who always nags at him to eat something more than ramen or takeouts, because health is important. The same one who’s so warm and caring no matter what kind of mess Jinyoung always gets them tangled in.

And the latter is determined to fix all this mess; if that won’t change Mark’s decision to never come back, be it, but at least he’ll be aware of Jinyoung’s feelings.

Jinyoung finally snaps from his sentimental and dramatic thoughts back to the airport a few moments later, the security check line moving too fast for his liking, as there’s a third terminal opened to deal with a flood of the passengers that happened due to a few back-to-back flights. He curses yet again, seeing how Mark is about to pass the glass wall, indicating that his turn to be checked will come soon, and Jinyoung knows that once the guy passes the security, it’s a game over.

So he runs, runs for his life, not even sparing a glance at the people he bumps into, but he still seems to be too slow – there’s only one person left in front of Mark and he’ll go soon too. Jinyoung tries to figure out all the possible ways of catching Mark’s attention while surrounded by all these people; throwing something isn’t an option, because not only it can hurt others, Jinyoung also doesn’t want to pay for the repair works if he accidentally broke that glass wall.

“Mark!” His last resort is shouting the guy’s name, however, to top everything, Mark is still with his earphones – the universe apparently didn’t stop hating Jinyoung and stabbing a knife right into his heart, figuratively speaking, letting to catch only the last glimpse of the love of his life. Jinyoung watches it like in a slow motion movie, as Mark is getting ready to take his backpack off, preparing for the check, and then he loses it completely.

He knows it’s dumb and that he will get into so much trouble at the best case scenario and probably will be either arrested or banned from ever setting a foot into this place at the worst; but he still bolts forward, trying to get through all the people waiting in line. It looks like a very dramatic movie scene – with all the people yelling Jinyoung to fuck off and some even physically trying to hold him back from getting any further. Seems like security also notice the shouts and commotion, but Jinyoung is determined to reach his destination no matter how much it will cost him later.

When he finally almost falls face down into the floor of the security area though, it is too late – Mark, not having much to be inspected, has already passed the metal detector, and now is heading to the airport immigration to have his passport checked once again.

Words get stuck in Jinyoung’s mouth, something weird thing not allowing him to shout Mark’s name – and it’s probably because of how calm and relaxed the guy looks, looking even happy to finally go home. And when the airport security finally realizes what’s happening and grabs him by the shoulder, strictly telling Jinyoung something, his heart sinks not because of the fact that by being there he broke numerous aviation laws and regulations.

It’s because for a split second, while taking back his passport from an immigration staff, Mark seems like he turns to spare a glance at all the mess that’s happening so near him, however, he either doesn’t see Jinyoung, or just pretends not to.

Jinyoung doesn’t say a word back when the security guards put handcuffs on his wrists, because what he just did is a security breach, a trespassing if you will. He doesn’t argue, he doesn’t resist even being put into a police car and driven to the nearest Incheon police station.

He doesn’t tell anything an hour later too, when a police officer finally frees him from his handcuffs after deciding he’s not dangerous and tries to coax him into telling his version of why he did such a stupid, but extremely serious offense, when it’s very well known that most cases like this go straight to court if the airport decides to push through with charges.

He only keeps looking at a clock on a wall behind the said police officer, completely zoning out the tiring woman’s voice, telling him that they’re going to wait for an airport representative and his parents to arrive before deciding on further actions. He doesn’t hear her at all, blabbering about some departure terminals that got shut because of his stunt; one more shift of the clock arms and it feels like Jinyoung’s heart breaks into thousands of little shards that will never be possible to glue back together.

The plane which Mark is supposed to be sitting in right now just set off, forever burying all Jinyoung’s hopes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so. damn. dramatic. honestly, i didn't think it will get so dramatic lmao, but at least we have a very not dramatic flashback to their childhood, that's some fifteen year old closure before the ending.  
> actually, i was contemplating whether to post this as a 3k chapter or just write one loooong update having two chapters combined to finish the story this week, but then i decided that i'll stick to the weekly updates to have one more week with you all, guys.  
> i hope you didn't get that much confused about the timeline of this story though djkjdjkd and as always, i hope you liked it, comments are always welcomed, and bear with me for one more week, i'll back off then, i promise.


	13. Chapter 13

Jinyoung’s parents and airport representatives arrive only after a few more hours, what leaves him plenty of time to think about everything. He’s not dumb – he knows he fucked up in more than one way – letting Mark go, probably getting dragged to court and most likely having troubles in university for that as well. It’s now safe to say that his entire life is just a never ending cycle of tragic events, but out of everything that happened today, the one hurting him the most is the fact that Mark _looked back_ for a second, and that Jinyoung still has no clue if Mark chose to ignore him because of everything that went down between them, or just because genuinely didn’t see a thing.

Settling things with the police takes another few hours and disappointed looks of Jinyoung’s parents’, making the guy feel like he’s the worst son in the entire planet. One thing turns out to be only half bad though – the airport decides not to go for the highest possible punishment after Jinyoung explains that he simply wanted to see his friend off and got carried away, which is half of the truth after all. It doesn’t help him come out of this clean though, he still gets fined with a several hundred thousand won, but Jinyoung has to agree that it’s way less than he expected considering that the police officers kindly let him know that thanks to new regulations and stricter laws he could’ve been sent straight to prison in the worst case scenario.

Once all the papers are signed, Jinyoung’s parents, of course, want to take him home themselves, maybe to kick his ass in the car for acting like a dumbass while they’re on the way, but police officers shake their heads – Jinyoung will need to come to Seoul with them.

“It’s the usual procedure.” They shrug, but it’s obvious that it’s more for a show, as they all know the incident made it to the news already. Jinyoung sighs upon hearing that; when you feel trapped anyway, a forty minute ride back with handcuffs on your wrists doesn’t seem like the most terrible thing.

Before coming here, Jinyoung thought that he’s going to a war from which he, most likely, won’t come back unharmed. He still hoped that he’ll be able to bring Mark back together with him, though; however, now he’s returning from Incheon in a police car, with handcuffs on his wrists and most decidedly, without Mark next to him, thinking when the hell his life went so wrong.

When they finally get back to the city and Jinyoung enters the campus, feeling his wrists slightly numb, everyone on his way is already staring at him, gossiping and gushing about what happened, and he tries not to listen to all the people, especially when the truth is already distorted into a story of Jinyoung trying to escape to another country and getting caught in the immigration, fighting half of the airport.

“For fuck’s sake, are you completely insane?” Those are the first words he hears from Jaebum and Jackson, who are camping in now only Jinyoung and Jackson’s room, since they’re missing a roommate. Both of the guys look more scared than mad though, obviously relieved that their friend is alive and okay. “We saw the news.”

“You’re the ones who told me to go there.” Jinyoung tells matter-of-factly, but he doesn’t even sound mad. It’s not their fault he’s just a chronically unfortunate idiot, he thinks.

“Yeah, but we didn’t tell you to go there and fight with the security for trespassing. I thought we won’t see you alive anymore, this shit is serious.” Jackson is ready to jump into a heated argument, but Jaebum gestures him to shut up. It’s barely 7 PM and it’s not even dark outside due to the slowly approaching summer, but Jinyoung is already changing into pajamas to crash into his bed. Not to sleep, however – more like to beat himself over everything for the upcoming eternity.

The negative answer is kind of obvious, but Jaebum still asks, “Are you okay?”

“Peachy.” Jinyoung mumbles, getting into bed and turning away from them. All he sees now is those stupid photos from the road trip hanged on the wall, his photos with Mark, and he tightly shuts his eyes, praying that once he opens them, the photos will be gone. But they’re still there, and all Jinyoung feels is the warmth of his own tears, threatening to eventually start rolling down his cheeks.

“Should we leave?” Jaebum asks again, voice obviously softer.

“I don’t care.”

Both of the guys understand that no matter what he says, Jinyoung does need some alone time – today was a long and a very unfortunate day with a lot of unpleasant events, so Jackson, fixing Jinyoung’s blanket so that the latter at least wouldn’t freeze to death, says, “If you need anything, we’re a call away. Don’t stress about it much.”

Jinyoung doesn’t answer, finally left alone to wallow in misery, thinking of scenarios how this day could’ve gone if he woke up earlier, if he found Mark earlier, if he wasn’t such an ass to Mark all this time, if he realized his feelings earlier, if—

There’s an unbearable lot of _ifs_ and they make Jinyoung want to scream, and at some point, between angry tearing up and getting lost in various possible outcomes, his mind simply shuts down, unable to handle this much stress and overthinking. He drifts into a restless sleep, tossing and turning in bed, dreaming the airport and various flashbacks of him and Mark together.

At some point, in his half-asleep half-awake state, Jinyoung thinks that he hears doors of the room opening and closing; it’s probably Jackson, returning from wherever he was with Jaebum, and Jinyoung, rolling onto yet another side, even manages to come to a conclusion that out of this entire mess at least those two are happy, so it’s okay.

He hears his mattress springs squeaking a little from extra weight, but he‘s not surprised – Jackson, having his lair in the top bunk, sometimes puts stuff he returns with on Jinyoung‘s bed before taking care of it, and the latter, even though not really a fan of it, never opposed. The thing that surprises him though, is that the weight doesn’t go anywhere like expected, and Jinyoung lifts his head to sleepily tell Jackson to screw off with all his stuff, but even though it’s already quite dark in the room, he can clearly see it’s not Jackson.

It’s Mark, casually sitting on his bed, and Jinyoung thinks he’s getting out of his mind. He wordlessly puts his head back on the pillow, closing his eyes and feeling how fast his heart is beating in panic, thinking that this is it, he’s seeing hallucinations.

“He’s not real.” He mumbles to himself. “He’s not real, he’s not there. It’s your imagination, just your imagination, he’s on the plane going back to the States, he’s not—“

Mark laughs a little, to Jinyoung’s horror, as now the latter is pretty sure he’s hearing voices. The guy gets up to turn on the light, and Jinyoung, squinting and raising his arm – either to block the light that seems like it’s going to burn his eyeballs or to fight the ghost he thinks he’s seeing – realizes that it’s not a dream, nor a hallucination. It’s really Mark Tuan, pretty much real and back to the dorm instead of going back to Los Angeles.

“What are you…” Jinyoung is clearly having a hard to picking words.

“What am I doing here?” Mark kindly finishes instead of him, this time sitting down on his own former bed. “Well… How should I say it? Some crazy idiot disturbed the entire airport and got half of the departure terminals shut down for an extra security check, my terminal included. And by the time they finished checking everything, we were already late by six hours.” He looks a little tired, the whole ordeal probably took a toll on him as well. “Then, when I finally got some free wifi minutes before the boarding started, I learned from the news that I actually know that idiot.”

“I’m sorry, I—“ Jinyoung’s mouth opens almost immediately, apologies spilling like there’s no tomorrow, but Mark cuts him off.

“And then I decided that I need to get out of there to see that one particular idiot and make sure he’s fine, so I caused ever more fuss, and here I am. However, the rest of the passengers bound for LA probably are making voodoo dolls of me, they got delayed for two more hours, because I really needed my suitcases back.”

Jinyoung can’t believe his ears, it sounds like a plot for a very dumb absurd drama – Mark, waiting for a delayed flight for six hours, only to change his mind the last minute and decide that he needs to go return to the campus… only to make sure Jinyoung’s alive and well? _How does that make sense?_

“Why did you… Why didn’t you fly back home?” He slowly asks, for some reason afraid of the possible answer.

Mark only smiles, not wanting give it away just yet. “My answer depends on the reason why on earth _you_ put yourself in a situation like that. You could’ve gotten arrested.”

“I did get arrested.” Jinyoung tells nonchalantly. Or at least he tries to sound so, but his voice cracks a little, both from sleepiness and from this weird feeling whenever he’s looking at Mark. It’s like thousands of butterflies would be fluttering their wings in his stomach, and Jinyoung knows that he’s fucked once again. But this time, maybe, not in a bad way. “As well as getting fined for trespassing, but I don’t really regret that I did it.” Mark only raises his eyebrow at this statement, waiting for an explanation, and Jinyoung gladly offers him one, finally like a grown up twenty-two year old adult telling everything he should’ve said way sooner. “I wanted to meet you before you depart. I didn’t want you to leave, or at least I didn’t want you to leave thinking I’m a total douchebag. Which I am, I know I am.”

“Park Jinyoung admitting to being an ass, that’s a thing that certainly needs to be videotaped.” Mark laughs, but his words are as warm as ever, not mocking or making fun.

In all honestly, Mark knows why Jinyoung was in the airport. He probably knew it, or at least _hoped_ for it, from the very first second after realizing that he indeed wasn’t just seeing things, Jinyoung definitely _was_ there, being held by the security. All this time, Mark simply thought that his eyes were playing tricks out of desperation and exhaustion after a sleepless night caused by a fight they had.

“Anyway.” Jinyoung rolls his eyes, but he’s grateful for Mark trying not to make him feel like trash about this. That’s one of the many things he loves about Mark – he’s always considerate of others, sometimes maybe even a little too much, even to the point of getting hurt himself. “I’m sorry, for what I said yesterday. And for being a terrible friend all this time, and avoiding you. I… Don’t want you to fuck off, everything’s my fault, I just realized some things and… Got scared of them.”

“What things?” Mark finally gets serious, looking him right in the eyes.

Jinyoung sighs, suddenly feeling afraid, but at the same time it’s ridiculously relieving to be able to say it out loud. “That everyone around me was right. I was avoiding and ignoring the obvious just because I was afraid that one day you’ll leave again, leaving me in the same place like it happened when we were teens.” Mark opens his mouth to say something, but Jinyoung wants to get it out of his chest before he runs out of the courage again, so he allows himself to interrupt. “Those two times though, back when I was twelve and now… they’re different. Back then I was hurt because I lost my best friend. Now…”

Mark doesn’t look at him anymore, finding it somehow more comfortable to look at the corner of Jinyoung’s bed. “Now?” He asks, previous teasing tones long gone from his voice.

“During that road trip I learned a lot.” Jinyoung starts from afar, feeling like his brain would be taking one step forward and two back instead of telling everything directly. “It was messy and it didn’t always go as we planned, especially between us, but that time you asked me if Jaebum is mad at you for leaving, I got so mad, because I was just… jealous. It felt like you cared more about what he thinks about you, than what I do. And I was angry about that.”

Mark, even though a little confused about this seemingly unrelated topic change, agrees that it’s about time to get some things right.

“I know.” He nods. “And I don’t blame you, I neither phrased it right, nor did I think a lot before asking it. We did drift apart mostly because of me, I can’t deny that. I was thirteen, everything in the States was too exciting after my parents decided that we’re staying – new school, new friends… It started to look like it won’t be a big deal if I will reply to your messages later, because due to the timezones you’d be getting ready to sleep anyway, then I’d just forget about it. Or when you’d offer to have a call, by the time I’d be already tired and go to sleep without even explaining anything. It’s a shitty thing to do, and that’s where I should apologize, not you.”

“We both were stupid.” Jinyoung bitterly laughs. “I think, at first I actually tried to make you jealous too, talking about Jaebum so much once he moved into the neighborhood. Then I somehow started to get over it, and then boom, you came back, and Jackson just dragged me to that road trip, and then I got so drunk in Pohang just because you said you have a crush on someone. It didn’t sit well with me, but back then I still didn’t know why.”

“Is that why you kissed me?” Mark asks, feeling how his heart is making him uneasy, anxiously waiting for the answer. “Because you wasn’t the fan of the idea of me liking someone?”

Jinyoung’s response is honest. “I don’t know, I barely remember it. Probably it was just my mind trying to show me some things, but it didn’t work out. I realized only when I saw you with Brian that night when Jaebum got wasted and confessed to Jackson.”

“Brian has nothi—“

“I know, I know.” Jinyoung assures. “But my head just stopped working, especially when Brian said that I’m like a brother to you. I was just too angry, disappointed and stupid to think properly. And besides, you heard my conversation with Jaebum, I know you did. That was why _you_ started to avoid me and didn’t even tell you’re going home.”

Mark nods, but he’s not proud of his behavior either. “I heard only the part of you saying that you don’t even like me, and it kind of cut the cord within me. At that time, I thought we’re kind of okay, but hearing that…”

“You didn’t hear the last half of the sentence.” Jinyoung takes a deep breath, knowing that his confession is so close to escaping his lips and sending them both to the unknown.

“And what’s that?”

“I thought… I thought I didn’t like you that much to make the first move.” Jinyoung spills it all in one go, sounding like he’s about to choke on his own words, and Mark frowns, trying to understand if he heard it correctly. “But when you left, I realized that I _do_ like you, a lot. My phone’s password is your birthday, for god’s sake. I was so smitten all this time and didn’t even know it, and later refused to do anything because you had a crush on someone else. That’s why I went to the airport today, I wanted to tell you all that, just I got a little too late and got myself into even more new mess. But… I really like you. And not as a friend.”

Mark sits silent, stunned by this speech. Jinyoung tries to catch his breath in panic – everything he just said feels so dumb and artificial; if he knew how, he’d tell how Mark makes him smile, in a whole different way than everyone else does, or how Mark makes him feel loved and safe. But now he can’t do anything else but to wait for the answer, and there are only two ways this can go – either Mark will think Jinyoung’s insane, or, with a help of some miracle, realizes that he feels at least a little bit similar.

“Let’s make some things clear first.” Mark lets out a small smile and Jinyoung can’t understand what is hiding behind it. “There’s no crush, at least not in the way you thought about it. I didn’t answer to Jaebum’s question directly that night in Busan just to see how you will react, but it backfired in all the ways possible. All this time it was you.”

“Me?” Jinyoung breathes out, feeling like his heart is about to stop.

“They always say that you want things, or people, you can’t have.” Mark lets out a silent laugh. “When I came back to Korea and started living here, I admit, I just wanted to make amends for all that shit that happened earlier. But as the time went, I learned that no matter how much you ignored me, I started to like you more than a childhood friend. You’re a good person, Jinyoung, you’re warm, you like to help people and make them feel comfortable around you. And I just wanted you to be safe and comfortable in return, especially after you walked into that piece of glass in the festival. I guess that’s called loving a person.”

Jinyoung buries his head in his palms, running his fingers through his hair in frustration, unable to believe he’s been so blind all this time. Everyone was giving him hints, Jaebum even openly told Jinyoung can’t fight Mark’s crush, because he can’t fight himself, and yet he couldn’t understand what it all meant. Or actually no, scratch that – he _can_ believe he was so blind, in the end, it’s so _his_ thing to do.

“That’s why I didn’t go back to LA.” Mark continues. “At first, I didn’t know it was you in the airport, I thought I was only seeing things, because I was sure you’re sleeping like a dead log in your bed, since you didn’t even move when I returned to the dorm to take my suitcases. But then, when I read the news, I knew that only you could think of such a thing. I know that I did so little to let you know about my feelings too, so I just hoped that it was me you were chasing after, and I took the risk. And I’m glad I did.”

Jinyoung still has a hard time believe this – Mark Tuan, after all the shit they went through, is still as warm as ever, now shyly smiling and most probably admitting that he likes Jinyoung back despite all the latter’s assholeness; and implying that he’s willing to try again, this time without any bullshit.

“Do you really have to go back to the States?” Jinyoung asks, knowing that Mark isn’t returning back because he wants it that much either, and to his horror, Mark sadly nods.

“Yes. My dad wants me to help with the business, at least during the summer, because my brother is still too young in their opinion, so I really do have to go.” It feels like Jinyoung’s heart is about to break again, but then Mark’s face lights up with a smile again. “But I kind of impressed the professors with my grades and they offered me to transfer here instead of doing an exchange program. They sent me a letter yesterday, they’re ready to accept me permanently, if only I’m willing to return in September.”

“And…” Jinyoung trails off after a pause. “Are you?”

Seconds keep passing until Mark answers, every one of them feeling like an eternity. “With a condition that you’ll stop ignoring me.” Mark smiles, and Jinyoung can genuinely and wholeheartedly say that it’s the most beautiful smile he’s ever seen on him. “Oh and also, a few dates would be nice. To see if I’m really willing to stay, you know.”

Upon these words Jinyoung feels so, so light, it seems like he could fly if he wanted. “I think I can do that.” He nods, after pretending to be thinking for a few moments. “But I also have one condition.”

“What is it?”

“Kiss me.”

It’s a little bold and definitely pushing some limits, as their relationship status is a little vague, but seems like Mark doesn’t care about that at all. Before he moves back to Jinyoung’s bed, he tells only, “Well, fair enough, someone has to make up for that parody of a kiss in Pohang.”

Jinyoung wants to argue that his kissing skills shouldn’t be judged by that one time he was drunk, but Mark doesn’t wait for excuses, swiftly pressing his lips against the younger’s. And then Jinyoung realizes why Jackson and Jaebum keep acting like they’re glued together; it just feels too good, to feel Mark’s lips on his, responding to the kiss and feeling his head slightly spinning - they both have been waiting for this the entire time.

After they finally break the kiss, solely because Mark, a future doctor, remembers that they’re not supposed to suffocate this evening, Jinyoung asks him where all of his stuff is. Mark tells that it’s in a hostel near the campus, he booked a room after returning to Seoul, because he doesn’t really have a place to stay until he gets a new plane ticket.

“You’re sleeping here.” Jinyoung declares, like Mark would be crazy thinking about getting back to some hostel now.

“What about Jackson?” Mark pretends to be hesitant, but he can’t hide the smile either.

“He can sleep at Jaebum’s, I don’t know and don’t care, but you’re staying.” Jinyoung insists, wrapping his arms around the older, as if determined to put up a physical fight if Mark tries to leave. The latter laughs at this, pleading to at least let him take a shower then.

Only after some time, when all the lights are turned off, their hearts light and finally content with the outcome of this entire mess, Jinyoung, feeling Mark’s chest pressing against his back as they’re sharing the bed, says, “That road trip was one of the best decisions of my life.”

“My hair was assaulted by Bambam in my sleep, so I would disagree.” Mark mumbles into his ear, and starts laughing again when Jinyoung softly hits him. “Okay, okay, I’m glad I went too. We did some stupid shit there, but I wouldn’t change a thing.”

None of them would change anything, they both would agree on that if they weren’t busy kissing again; because the greatest part of road trips isn’t arriving to a new city or getting back home. It’s all the wild and crazy stuff that happens along the way.

And they definitely had plenty of that stuff happening.

 

It feels like Jinyoung would be flying, the wind making a mess out of his hair, just that it’s not exactly that; they’re just riding a scooter, a red secondhand scooter, one of the many ridiculous things Mark decided to get a part-time job for. Jinyoung’s hands are wrapped around Mark’s waist and he thinks he could’ve dressed in something better than some blue hoodie, so weirdly contrasting with Mark’s yellow one, but his thoughts are soon interrupted. Mark turns to him, flashing the biggest and the most loving smile, the same one that is saved for Jinyoung, and him only; the latter wants to tell him to focus on the road in front of them, but Mark doesn’t listen, leaning in for light peck the lips and Jinyoung frowns, thinking it’s a little weird and probably too hard to lean in like this when you’re driving a scooter, and then—

And then an alarm clock goes off, forcefully dragging Jinyoung out of his dream and making him grunt as he needs to get his arm out of the warm bedsheets to hit the snooze button. Just a few more minutes, that’s all he needs, but Mark, woken up by the alarm clock as well, nuzzles his head into Jinyoung’s shoulder, telling, “Don’t, you’ll be late again.”

“I just want to sleep a little more, is that a sin?” Jinyoung whines, turning around and sleepily looking at Mark, who’s equally sleepy, if not more. “I had such a nice dream.”

“What was it?”

Jinyoung smiles, eyes wrinkling into his signature cat whiskers, and Mark thinks it’s the most adorable thing ever. “I dreamed that we’re still young and carefree and you’re driving me somewhere on a red scooter. It felt nice.”

Mark only laughs at it, dragging Jinyoung closer into his embrace, not helping with the younger’s urge to just call in sick and ditch work today. “I think I’ve actually dreamed that before too, but stop acting like we’re seventy, Jinyoung. You’re twenty-eight, and I’m still technically a university student, excuse you.”

“Just because you decided to be a surgeon, don’t blame me for that. You’re twenty-nine, you’re old. And married.” Jinyoung retorts, but they both know it’s just a joke.

“Not yet.” Mark sticks his tongue out to tease.

“You will be, next week, so.” Jinyoung tries to kick him, what turns into a whole full-blown limb fight under the sheets, and that eventually becomes their usual morning making out session, before Jinyoung remembers he _really_ has to go, politicians shouldn’t be late to meetings. Not that he is one, he’s just an assistant of one for now, but he’s been promised a huge career in the field, so the point still stands.

After Jinyoung takes a shower and returns to the room to raid his wardrobe and pick an outfit for today, Mark, still lazing around in bed, suddenly asks, “Aren’t you afraid?”

“Of what?” Jinyoung turns around, holding two ties for Mark to pick.

“The one in your left.” Mark responds without batting an eyelash, because for some reason he really enjoys seeing Jinyoung with a white shirt and black tie. And then he continues. “Of getting married.”

Jinyoung, trying to wrestle with his tie so that it wouldn’t strangle him but still would look acceptable, shrugs. “The only thing I’m afraid about this wedding is that Jaebum or Jackson will get shitface drunk again and start telling everyone how they caught us having sex in one of the empty lecture halls during my last year. It seems to be their ice breaker story lately.” Mark chuckles at that, because they truly weren’t the wisest when it came to lust back then. “Other than that, if this isn’t your subtle hint that you’re chickening out the last second, I think I have a really decent man to marry, so I’m good. Besides, at least you’ll make tons of money being a surgeon, what else could I need.”

Mark throws a pillow at him and Jinyoung starts laughing. Mark tries to doze off for a little bit more, since he has to be in the hospital only at midday today, and Jinyoung, finally fully ready to go, leans in to place a soft kiss on Mark’s forehead, saying, “I’m not afraid of anything. You’re the person I truly want to have in my life, so there’s nothing to be afraid of.”

Next week, Bambam gets late to their wedding ceremony, dramatically running into the venue when the guests are asked if there’s anyone opposing this marriage, causing a round of laughter so wild, Jinyoung thinks his stomach is about to burst; Jackson and Jaebum truly do get drunk during the afterparty and tell a whole slew of embarrassing stories about the newlyweds.

They don’t feel bothered by that though, busy with other things - once in Pohang Mark said that you can cure burns with sugar, so the only thing they care about at the moment is how to become sugar to each other’s burns for the rest of their lives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woah, okay, why do i feel so nervous lmao. before i get all sappy and shit, a few important things
> 
> the dream part of the chapter was highkey inspired by a fanart that was lowkey inspired by this fic, you can check it out it [here](https://twitter.com/cloud69b/status/906436645938880512) (p.s.: check out all the other works too, avery is amazing)
> 
> okay, now i can go as sappy as i want.  
> yall know that i usually don't write fluff, so i always complained about this story on twitter, or to my friends and stuff, and constantly was talking about quitting and deleting and shit, but honestly, somewhere in the end, it finally grew on me, i accepted it into my heart somewhat and it feels really weird that it's the last chapter already. i just want to thank all of you who read this and commented and put up with my countless typos (sorry for those btw, i'm gonna go back and find as many as them as possible), you're all the real mvps that didn't allow me to quit.  
> the other reason why this story is somehow dear to me, because, i, typically, put a little of myself here. i was in all the places the boys were in this fic, more or less in the same order, with a person really dear to me; things have changed over the time, but it's probably still one of the dearest memories i have of that period of my life, so... yeah, if those places felt a little more alive to you than it sometimes happen in fics, i'm really, really glad.  
> oh god, i'm turning into a mess, so i think it's enough blabbering, thank you guys yet again for everything, and enjoy the upcoming comeback of the boys, and take care of yourselves. if you want to scream at/with me, you can find me on twitter @ jinyoungstuan, bye <3
> 
> p.s.: if this fic had a playlist, aka what i was listening while writing these messy 13 chapters:  
> jjp - find you  
> markjin - higher  
> weki meki - i dont like your girlfriend  
> winner - love me love me  
> jessica - summer storm  
> pristin - we like; we woo  
> chungha - why don't you know  
> blackpink - as if it's your last  
> bts - best of me


End file.
